Ruining a child's outlook on life is simple, if you don't care they won't care neither
Expecting kids to act as adults all the time, that's just senseless, their just kids
Pressuring them to become what you expect them to become in life.
Remedy: Ask them early in life what do they want to be when they grow up.
This will tend to stimulate a growth and maturation process of self confidence & self worth in your kids.
Meaning at a very young age they can feel assured that they have some say in what their dreams & aspirations are to become in life.
Giving them freedom to choose will indeed change future outcomes in their lives.
This may happen especially if they remain focused on their education, social activities, overall health, and their emotional well being from youth till adulthood.
Note: Parents are a major factor in the emotional stability of a child & their overall well being.
If you're not stable, they will also tend to follow suit, so try to rethink things a bit & get help yourself if its all becoming to much for you to handle.
There are many professional groups that can assist parents in learning how to become more emotionally stable, on the web & on the ground.
Here's a great resource for parenting called "Parent Further", which is a web based professional advice network for parents looking for assistance.
It was made to assist them in many area's if the need is there, & is purely informational as well as anonymous (no login or social features).
Patience is Key & Caring means everything to them
Teaching bad habits threaton a childs future
Abusive forms of discipline makes for an eventual life of harshness for the suffering child or children, hardened behaviors & lack of love as well as loss of respect for parental authority or guidance overall.
Remedy: To show them you love em, try to speak in a well controlled manner while rendering discipline, yelling isn't the answer nor is residing to physical forms of harsh punishments.
The mind controls the body, so you need to gain access to their thinking, and response patterns before proceeding into any physical actions that would render a temporary solution.
Many traditional hitting, & fear tactics aren't accepted today, so rethink how you approach the discipline arena of parenting, you might need help with it all, since many people have been brought up incorrectly these days.
Ignorance is bliss, so try to do the right thing- Lead by example
Doing drugs / Selling Drugs or any other self destructive thing around them, yup that's the best way to ruin a child's future.
Example: Smoking cigarettes around them or Drinking liquor.
Spreading rumors about others around your children, by way of gossip, your child will acquire your gift of gab, so be careful what comes from your lips, they will repeat it.
Lying, cheating or stealing things.
Promiscuous sexual partners, or indecent exposure of yourself or others.
Allowing them to view pornographic material or adult content.
Fighting with your spouse, friends, relatives or strangers, physically or yelling, its the perfect way to show them lack of self control.
Gambling around them illegally, or legally.
A host of many other personality dis-orders & social issues can stem from all of these bad habits not being corrected, which may eventfully show itself right away by the child's behavior, or somewhere else down the road in their life.
Spoiling a child by giving them everything they ask for, this leads to children never getting a grasp on the true values of life, they tend to not get the concept of sharing or helping others as well.
Remedy: Set realistic limits for your children like if they ask for more toys, set given parameters around the giving of such gifts & or luxury of having their way, so that they fully comprehend what it is they were given & what it is that will occur if they overindulge or mis-use such things being given.
This helps to show them value, there needs to be some sort of feed back mechanism in place, to show differing levels of responsiveness, which will lead to eventual responsibility for their actions, care for ones goods & understanding of others wishes as well.
Allowing them to talk back without a well defined explanation, if they talk back ask them questions, this will open an arena for discussion, understanding & possible resolution as opposed to developing the inferiority superiority complex between parent and child.
Possible Remedy: No complex will exist with complete clear communications made effective.
Our children have a voice & need to be heard, but we must establish effective communications at the beginning so we can trust their words they deliver to us & they can trust ours at all times as well.
Frowning upon their gestures or activities in the public, as an act of showing your rule over them, that's the best way to lose a child's respect
example: One of your kids is having fun with a group of friends at the playground, & you become angry about something you see them do, so you instantly scold them right in front of everyone, by yelling at them.
Best proposed method of action:The suggested way to handle this sorta sticky issue of sorts, is to handle the issue with them in private, behind closed doors if at all possible, maybe even inform them quietly what you feel, before just over reacting & jumping straight into any harsh discipline tactics.
Note: Every situation is different so by acting accordingly, it will help prevent from your child potentially becoming dis-respectful to you later on in life. Basic situational awareness is a must in most cases.
Meaning make sure that you remedy the issue entirely so not to leave it uncorrected, so that the behavioral issue or issues you've noticed cannot repeat itself.
Simply ask your child what it is they were doing, and focus attention on them being honest with you.
There's nothing wrong with removing them from their activity temporarily, at least till they correct their unwanted behavior, and if done in a kind gentler, but firm manner should help to harness their respect of your wishes.
Unruly children may need to be taken home if their behavioral issues intensify to uncontrollable, just be wise an remain under calm control.
Consistence is also the best way to establish this form of fair play parenting controls.
Always let your children know how much you love them & mean it from the heart, it helps resolve most issues & don't forget to hug them & kiss them if they correct any bad behaviors.
I'm pretty sure you do anyhow, but you never know with parents these days & all the added pressures they faced with daily.
10 helpful Tips in dealing with discipline issues while parenting
Establish some ground rules early when children are developing.
These ground rules will set a foundation for them to follow.
Pay close attention to behavioral patterns, children can be clever at times.
These behavioral patterns are developed early at the toddler stages.
To correct some children's bad behavior you need to be firm, but loving.
Show them with kind, loving words what it is they are to do, & what it is they are not to do, but don't be afraid to become firm when necessary for the best forms of disciplinary response & stimuli with usage of words alone is to occur.
Now being overly critical or too harsh can & will quickly turn them tolerant to that behavior.
Establish a reward for good behavior system, a time out for bad behavior, & when necessary temporarily ban their usage of certain specific material possessions they expect to have or receive all the time, till the behavior is corrected. Such as games, toys, tv, any physical objects that may impair the time out session.
The time out sessions shouldn't last for more then 1 hour on end, remember getting extreme with any one thing can be damaging as well.
Never reward children for bad behavior, that is asking for them to rule you by command, by whining, and a vast multitude of temper tantrums.
Awesome new Video Cam Tech to help monitor your Kids
Parental Advisory Warnings! Technology & Gadgets
Allowing them to view negative media, tv, movies, videos, video games, music, uncensored internet sites, or any physical materials such as, photography, magazines, books, or publications that contain harsh graphics or auditory sounds that are inappropriate for children, this is a sure way to contribute to the corruption of the precious mind that our children's have from birth.
Remedy: consistently monitor your children from time to time to see what they getting into, show concern about the levels of media they're receiving and exposed to daily, because parents who don't care, will effectively allow children to develop addictions to many obscene things leading to adult issues when they grow up.
Facts: Many of the issues we all know of very well today, so it will not be covered here. Many of the negatively based topics, can and will be discussed in future hubs of this nature. Parents who show concern in what it is their children are interested in, will also help guide them away from harmful content being rendered daily on many levels.
Note: many of the technologies we have today all have some sorta of adult parental controls that we as parents, are 100% responsible for applying & activating. Seek professional assistance if you have no idea about any advanced tech you allow your children to utilize prior to exposure, in terms of the parental control settings & especially computer related internet access points.
Obviously if you purchase, or expose your child to any adult content, that is entirely your fault for ruining their innocence, which they actually do need to remain stable minded & sane, whether you knew that or not is besides the point, just try to keep in mind these crafty advanced devices need to be monitored daily or you may be in for a rude awakening in the unforeseen future.
Effective use of Speech & Reading
Talking nonsense to them, purposely telling lies to them, use of foul language around them, these are great ways to destroy a young minds potential for learning & true self confidence.
Remedy: speak sensibly to children, and definitely when they're newborn infants as well as all the way through their toddler stages.
Speaking gibberish to them all the time is only going to inhibit their senses, try to converse with them intelligently especially if you want them to have a better chance of grasping the language in which you speak, and any others you wish them to adapt too.
Reading to children is a definite way to help kick start their learning potential, its fun & helps encourage education.
Note: Play fair, if you expect them to do well in their future become more sensible with how you talk to them, children remember everything that comes from your mouth to their precious ears.
This is a very sensitive ground, the communications process between parents & their children must not be taken lightly.
Schooling, study time, homework & Discipline
The kids get home from school & you put them in front of the TV to get them out the way, or letting them run off to their devices & toys of many types prior to anything else.
The facts: many parents try to find a way to take a break from parenting.
Remedy: try to help them with their learning and education process early in the game, it will help you to see what they're getting into daily during & after school.
The learning process takes time so try home schooling young toddlers prior to their arrival & attending public or private schooling, it will prepare them for a world of challenging educational experiences & subjects.
Inviting their friends over & they haven't got any homework or studying done.
Remedy: setting a scheduled homework, study time & rest periods or nap times.
Facts: studies show that when kids have a set program in place, the tendency for them to go off track is cut down to a minimum; meaning they will have less of a chance of missing homework assignments, missed studying sessions etc...
Note: if they need tutoring try your best to make sure they get it from a qualified tutor, by their teachers & or an after school program.
Be a more caring & responsive parent - After all their your responsibility
Acting as if your kid's aren't your responsibility, like pawning off your parental responsibilities to others is a perfect way to show them you don't truly care.
Try to show some love to them, our children crave attention & loving care, so if you don't give it to them, there's going to be a great hole to be filled, that many people never forgive their parents for placing there, for the lack there of.
Facts: where a parent lacks, others will attempt to fill, & artificial love is the worst kind.
Remedy: try being honest & genuine with them in how you handle anything related to your child's nurturing process.
Note: if your parents didn't show love or care to you when you were a child, you may need counseling to learn how to care & love others. It all begins with self love, and takes a great deal of time to heal from any psychological damage you may have received from your own childhood.
This can happen ever so slightly even if you pawn your responsibility off to your spouse including response times to all situations that can & will arrise, this is the greatest potential in unseen damage to a child's psyche.
Growth requires good nutrition
Instead of always taking your children out to eat fast foods & stuffing them with snacks, try developing a pattern of healthy food shopping for organic products, cooking at home & eating at the table at home.
Following these tips will ensure good wholesome values that our children need to learn today.
Note: There's nothing like a good home cooked meal, if you need help learning to cook, there's many resources online such as EHow, where you can learn literally anything.
Nutribullet fruit juicer, health notes and what insp... Today our overall health awareness has raised to an all time high worldwide. Foods have been genetically altered and modified for years in many ways, to make for a better appearance, appealing taste, and life cycle on the shelf as well as fast sell,
Good Nutrition works wonders
Eating in front of them without offering them any or simply not sharing at all, now that's plain training them to become selfish.
Definite Remedy: don't be stingy, sharing is caring & plan ahead to offer your food items; meaning don't go purchasing food only for you without thinking about them first, children actually should come first in anyone's book.
Forcing them to eat something that really taste nasty, like unseasoned uncooked vegetables, now that will make them lean more towards harmful foods.
Remedy: maybe try to work out a more sensible menu palette for your children, any forced acts that can & will make them sense your being overly controlling will possibly create a rejection complex, where they will begin to auto reject certain foods.
Also try organic alternative foods as opposed to processed foods, your kids senses are keen and can detect when something isn't right. (Juicing of veggies works wonders with fruits)
Listen to your kids when they tell you that something doesn't taste right, it can help you avoid many future issues in dealing with health issues, such as allergies and other unseen issues that are bound to arise.
There's also loads of recipes online to help assist parents in the cooking, & the food preparation process for many menu items for the family overall as well as for toddlers, young kids & teenagers.
Over doing it with anything can spell doom when it comes to children especially when it comes to food & feeding them unhealthy choices of food items, such as junk foods, candies & a host of other miscellaneous processed foods.
Fact: Many parents have the tendency to get extreme with things, if you overdo something it may become your child's extreme tendency in their future.
Remedy: try to become more balanced in what you indulge in doing in front of your children & seek more stability in good health, whether it be physical, mental or spiritual in nature so that happiness can be achieved on all levels possible.
No Nonsense - teach them bad habits spells doom for kids
Wrongful hitting in any form of physical abusiveness, torcherring, taunting, sexual abuse, or threatening them.
Acting as if they don't exist at all, not acknowledging them, & showing favoritism of one child over the other.
Remedy: let them know how important they are to you, & to themselves, simply give them attention when they need it, spend some much needed quality time with each child equally.
Note: try to make sure not to favor one child over the other to much, it tends to harbor jealousy in many children.
By sharing the love equally can help them to repeat the favor with one another, because favoritism can also create separatism.
Be wise and think before you do something in this area of parenting, because how you treat your children will reflect on you in the long run.
Bad habits like this one can and surely will come back to haunt you as your children mature in age, possibly even ruining the family cohesiveness we all desperately need today.
End result if the pattern of favoritism goes uncorrected: many children treated unfairly at such a high frequency throughout their youthful learning & development stages, will have the tendency to become loaner's.
Children can even experience unavoidable sibling rivalry's, that may not have existed otherwise, possibly suffer huge personal losses of love, maybe even develop personality complexes/disorders, the list goes on & on.
Especially those of whom have been somewhat singled out on a daily basis by their parents and eventually peers, as the unfavored one, and on some extreme cases throughout their entire youth and in many families it's a norm to do so.
This particular bad habit many parents exhibit to their kids, has the potential to somehow cause a development of a low self esteem, that's usually etched into the heart and mind of their child.
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