To My Deceased Father
To my deceased father,
I was 6 years old when I lost you. My memories flood in each day I look in the mirror and see you looking back at me. Why? Because I look just like you. When u died it seemed like my whole world changed. You were my angel in a human body that got to be my dad for only 6 years of my life, and that was the best 6 years of memories that I carry with me each day. I had nightmares of you dying almost every night, and I would scream for you when I was sad and, I had to realize you weren’t coming back. You are what held our family together. You were the man indeed.
Every time I felt ugly I would run to your lap and you would tell me that I was the prettiest little girl God could ever create. You protected me with your life, which hurts because I couldn't protect you from the massive heart attach that stole you away from me two days before Christmas. Growing older I was angry at the world. I remember wishing to see you one last time every year on my birthday until I was about 15 years old. After that I gave up on that ever happening.
I wrote this letter for you to tell you that you taught me more in those 6 years then you would ever imagine.
You taught me to never take life seriously because, life was to short to take anything seriously.
You taught me to pray ever night before you go to bed. Even if you come home late from work.
You taught me that green beans really won't kill me if I eat them, and that the sun still rises in the morning for a new day, after a bad day.
You taught me that one junk food night out the week was ok, and starving was never a option.
Most importantly dad, you taught me the true meaning of unconditional love. We had a bond stronger then anything I could ever imagine. You were my best friend.
I'm getting married soon and I went to visit you today. Obviously you're not there but I like to think you are at times. I sat down and told you how angry I was that you left me here, and can't walk me down the isle, that I'll never get to have my daddy daughter dance. You never got to threaten the boy that broke my heart for the first time. Your never got to see me get my diploma from high school, or make my first home run in softball. You never got to here me sing at church for the first time or be proud of all the painting I painted.
You were just gone out of nowhere, still to this day I cry to be in your arms, and watch you wiggle your toes together as you napped on the couch. Even hearing you yell at football games on TV or in real life didn't really matter to you, because no man was as passionate about the Jasper Bulldogs other then you.
Dad you were the best father I could have ever had and I was your only a little girl and now I'm going to walk down the isle and be married and you can't be the one to do it, and let me tell you it's heartbreaking.
Because of the man you were I know what a good man is. I will always have you safely in my heart. Until we meet again dad, I will forever be your little girl, and the one face I can't wait to see when it's my time to go is yours standing there waiting on me to come home to you.
Until we meet again dad I will make you as proud as you were when you first held me. You may be gone but I made a promise to not let you down. I will always love you.
Love always, your pookie girl.