ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Teenage Depression and Suicide - Should You Spy On Teenager?

Updated on June 30, 2017

Looking Through Cell Phone Text Messages

Spying On Your Kids or Checking On Your Kids-There's a Difference

Spying or being concerned?
Spying or being concerned?

Know What Your Child Is Doing-Monitor Your Children

The question here is basically, is it okay to spy on your teenagers or your child? Well, I believe that we have mostly all done it at some time when your kids were younger. You got a little nosey and decided to snoop around in your kids computer to see what he/she was looking at. After all, they were about 11 or 12 and you wanted to make sure they weren't talking to a predator. Keeping kids safe online to me, well, that was what I should be doing and is fine and my right!

Why Snooping On Your Teen Could Be Important

Below I will talk about why I think snooping or "spying" on your kids may be in fact, a blessing or at least, something you could be glad you did. You will also read where, in some instances, your child will be glad you did as well. It can relieve them of something they had really needed to talk about with you and were afraid or embarrassed, etc.

At first, you may be ashamed of yourself by even thinking about spying on your child and think, "what kind of mother am I". I know I would have really been po'd at my mom if she did. However; now that I'm older, I know she did and it was her right as a parent and also it was being a concerned mother.

A Mother Going Through Child's Computer

Spying and checking your child's computer
Spying and checking your child's computer

Caring Is Not Disrespecting

Young adults and their privacy should be respected. I am not disputing this at all. But now your kid is now growing into a young man/woman and you really want to check, but you know it's just not right and it's an invasion of their privacy. I would NOT want my mother to snoop on me and I'm old now.

So, my question is: When is the time to start snooping? Here are a few tips that I believe is the right time when it's okay and you aren't just being nosey.

It's Okay to Snoop IF:

  1. Is your son/daughter very edgy and not acting right?

  2. Do they seem depressed?

  3. Are they ignoring you or avoiding talking as much as they can?

You pretty much know your child, and you know if something just doesn't seem right.

If you have answered yes to just one question, then my advice is to go for it. I know there are a lot of you who disagree, and believe me, at one time, I did too. However; my teen was going through some teen things, and he didn't want to talk about it to mom and dad (of course). Well, by snooping, and NOT BEING NOSEY, it was a good thing in our case. Nothing catastrophic, and nothing outside normal teenager troubles, but it was something that needed to be addressed. I'm glad I snooped. Only to know that something was going on and I knew something was troubling my child. I honestly didn't do it out of boredem, I did it because I was concerned. Bad parenting? No! Good judgement? Yes! Cross the line? Absolutely not and I would do it again if I thought my child needed me and now he knows he can always come to mom and dad about anything.

Of course he's still a smart-ass, and knows it all, that hasn't changed. What did change, is his attitude a little bit and not walking around with his head down and not talking and disappearing in his room to cry alone.

Mothers, do what you have to do to save your kids..you can't be there for everything, but if you can help them anyway at all and you feel something is wrong, go for it. Only out of concern, not just being a nosey rosey. End of story

Video About Checking and Spying On Your Children

Take The Snooper Poll

Do You Snoop on Your kids?

See results

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • weezyschannel profile image
      Author

      Lisa 6 months ago from Central USA

      That's not a bad idea- children didn't come with an instruction booklet and again, I'm sorry if others don't agree with me; but I believe the peer pressure is so great nowadays, that i don't feel as if it's invading privacy; I believe it's preventing a catastrophic outcome

    • weezyschannel profile image
      Author

      Lisa 3 years ago from Central USA

      great comment Hyphen!

    • weezyschannel profile image
      Author

      Lisa 3 years ago from Central USA

      Good nybride...hope all turns out well! good luck

    • weezyschannel profile image
      Author

      Lisa 3 years ago from Central USA

      Good for your AlUR..you have to!

    • weezyschannel profile image
      Author

      Lisa 3 years ago from Central USA

      I am sure that I am getting some really mixed feelings on this subject, but until it actually comes down to it and happens, there is no way anyone would not spy and check on the child..actually, spy is really not a right word to use, it should say "making sure your child is okay."

      Thanks for all the feedback, good and the "non" agreeable"

    • bettybarnesb profile image

      bettybarnesb 3 years ago from Bartlett, TN

      Hey Weezyschannel - I was reading someone else post and saw yours and it was a "must read." My children are grown now but growing-up I periodically spied. It was necessary and important to stay in their lives, even the part they tried to keep me out.

      Good article..

    • Hyphenbird profile image

      Brenda Barnes 4 years ago from America-Broken But Still Beautiful

      I do not consider it snooping, prying or invading privacy. Children require supervision in all areas of their lives because they are not capable of making experienced decisions. One way we eliminate potential for problems is that computers are in common rooms only. They do not go into the bedrooms, etc. This way, we have nothing to hide. It is a difficult and interesting subject you have here.

    • profile image

      Xaxa 5 years ago

      Come on, are you seriously wondering if snooping what your children do online is ethical or not? All of you are being spy by your goverments at this moment and you seem to accept it (or maybe do not want to think about it). It is about "security" they say... ok, the same applies to your children, right?

    • weezyschannel profile image
      Author

      Lisa 5 years ago from Central USA

      thats a great idea..I really honestly felt horrible snooping, especially when my son is 17...not on drugs, not a trouble kid at all, just depressed. It's hard growing up these days, especially with all the peer pressure. I do have to say some of the not talking is partially my fault because I have been ill for many years, and he doesn't want to bother me with his problems too. I say, if you are very concerned, then it's okay to go through emails, phone messages, etc. sorry for anyone who disagrees, but it's my kid and if something was to ever ever bother my child to a degree that it needs looked into, then I don't want that on my conscience that I didn't do enough to foresee or know what is going on in my child's life. Thank God it wasn't anything devastating, but it was enough to warrant talking to and getting it off his chest. Thank you for the input

    • nybride710 profile image

      Lisa Kroulik 5 years ago from Minnesota

      After I got a call from school about my 15 year old acting depressed, I went into her room and found some drawings that confirmed she needed help. Since then, I look at drawings and stuff she leaves around the house to try to gauge if she is feeling depressed.

    • weezyschannel profile image
      Author

      Lisa 5 years ago from Central USA

      Well, I agree Alur. I got a facebook to watch a little too. Good thing I did..that's kind of how I knew something was wrong as well. I think it is more of a responsible concerned parent, than it is over reacting..thanks for your input

    • ALUR profile image

      ALUR 5 years ago from USA

      I wouldn't say "snoop" but as a responsible parent I try to be aware. I find however, I'm vulnerable than I thought when I overhear a conversation or notice a facebook post she's made!

    Click to Rate This Article