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Are You too Busy to Notice That Your Child is Lonely?
Busy Parents And Their Lonely Children!
© Chitrangada Sharan May 2013
All Rights Reserved
Some examples that you may have noticed around you---
1. A small boy aged around five developed cavities in his tiny teeth.
2. Another small girl aged around seven put on a lot of weight at such a tender age.
3. Have you noticed children biting their nails, bed wetting even when they have crossed that age.
4. There are children who lack self confidence, find it difficult to communicate, are self conscious or have low self esteem.
5. Speech defects like stammering, lack of coordination while having food or doing any work.
The reason :
- Parents of such children may be senior executives in big companies and they do not have enough time for their children.
- Of course they have employed caretakers for their kids. But can they take care of the kids, as properly as the parents themselves.
- To keep them engaged, they are either given chocolates or cookies, and their mouth is not cleaned properly after that.
- Or they are engaged to watch Television like a couch potato.
- There can be many stories such as these around you.
- Have you noticed small children sitting and peeping from their windows.
- They might smile at you, when you look at them, might even run out of the door, only to be pulled back by their caretakers.
Parents Point Of View:
When you talk to the parents about this, they might say, 'What can we do? We are doing this for their better future only.' Should we leave all the success and money at the cost of emotions?'
You do need money for better education and higher education and even for a respectable living, isn't it?
They are right!
How do you define this then-----On one side, parents struggling hard to give a respectable living to themselves and their children. On another hand, a lonely child, with all the worldly riches and facilities, but no one to share his moments of happiness or sorrow.
Do you spend quality time with your child?
Parenting Tips: How Can Loneliness Affect Your Child?
Few Decades Earlier:
To leave children with a caretaker or a house help was not a common thinking some three to four decades earlier.
In those days most of the families had joint family system and even if both the parents were working, children were not left alone in homes.
They had the company of their affectionate grandparents.
With the prevalence of nuclear families or single parents, the problem of lonely children is ever on the rise.
The Negative Effects Of Loneliness Among Children:
1. The Psychologists observe that, the Emotional and healthy development of the child can be adversely affected, if the child is left alone at house.
2. The child might develop a suppressed emotion or feeling towards relationships, including own parents.
3. The feelings of, 'Share and Care', with parents vanishes gradually. The child might in fact get close to anyone who gives him/ her company, even the wrong one.
4. It is easier to learn bad habits than the good ones.
Watching programs which are not right for his age, on T.V. or Internet, getting fascinated by criminal activities, learning to avoid studies are some of the serious results of Loneliness in a child.
5. Such children might develop sleep disorders, may not mix with people, may not talk much, might develop distance from parents.
6. Lonely children grow up into complex personalities. As such they may find it difficult to have cordial relations with anyone.
How to find a balance between your busy life and your kids?
- Society and its setup is always changing, according to the new situations and requirements. And when new things happen, it does take sometime to adjust to changes. There is always a particular reason for a major change in society.
- Nowadays, it is a necessity for both the parents to be working, in order to manage a decent living. As such, we must try to analyse the above mentioned issue, with a positive frame of mind and find out a solution, keeping the interest of both parents and children.
- If the parents understand at the right time and take corrective measures, there is a possibility that the problem will be solved and no damage will be done.
1. Howsoever busy the parents may be, spending some quality time, with your child is a must.
2. Even if the parents are not present physically, remain connected, mentally and emotionally, even in their smallest activities.
3. It is the responsibility of the parents to give direction to their child' s thinking or thought process.
4. If you show examples of firmness, confidence, the capability to handle difficult situations and remain calm and collected, your child will learn and develop similar qualities.
So, teach by example.
5. Make your child feel special. Instead of scolding over their mistakes, explain the good and the bad with patience.
6. Listen to them, their small fears or even new ideas.
FINDING A BALANCE:
- Many schools have employed Counselors, to look into the rising problem of loneliness and depression among children.
- Do attend Parent-Teacher meetings to discuss issues related to your child.
- You never know, you might find a way to deal with small issues, before they become big issues.
- This issue is not an isolated problem, it can give birth to many other problems.
- While mothers think it necessary to go for jobs outside to support the family and children in particular.
- The parents themselves, might develop differences due to lack of communication or out of guilt feeling, they might blame each other and may even result in broken families.
- In order to avoid this, parents must find a balance sensibly, keeping in view the child's proper physical and emotional growth and their own busy life and career.
© Chitrangada Sharan 15th May, 2013
All Rights Reserved.
PROTECTED: PLEASE DO NOT COPY!
At what age your child can be left safely at home source: You tube
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© 2013 Chitrangada Sharan