The Miracle Of Life & Frustration Of Infertility
The Rising Rate Of Infertility
Remember having a desk next to the class clown in sex ed? Yeah, so do I. There were times, where the comedic relief was welcome. Like when he broke into the condom stash and stripped one down over his head and the teacher walked in, grabbed him by the shirt collar and walked him across the hall to the principal, still wearing the condom. Other than that, I distinctly recall sitting there red in the face that entire semester, staring down the clock. I think we all did. Then came the Miracle of Life video and I swear every girl in the room clinched her knees together. Myself included. The guys mentally agonized over how painful it must be too. Except the class clown. His main focus seemed to be making jokes and commentating every video all semester long, so this video was no different. When it came time for the birth, he delivered his final joke: "Looks like a wet Saint Bernard squeezing through a cat door!" As you can imagine, he paid the principal another visit.
The Miracle of LIfe
Conception: Not Always An Easy Task
Back in high school, those sex ed videos sure made it seem like anyone who had intercourse, even once, was going to end up with a baby 9 months later. As adults, we can see that it was a pretty good scare tactic. We know now that every time you "knock boots" a pregnancy doesn't happen. For some, that's a good thing! If you have an infertility diagnosis or know someone who has one, you know that an instant pregnancy is the stuff dreams are made of. In practice, it's not always as simple as inserting "A" into "B" and 36-40 weeks later you have a baby. In theory, doctors recommend that couples engage in unprotected intercourse for at least a year. It takes an average of one year for couples to conceive. If after that time, conception hasn't happened they suggest it's time to make an appointment. Here's where things tend to get a little hairy. There tends to be some reluctance by one or both individuals. First of all, make sure you're on the same page. Do you want the same things? Secondly, Sure, it's a little embarrassing talking about your naughty bits but in the larger scheme of things, it takes two to tango. What's good for the goose is good for the gander- in other words, if the wife is getting a look over, so should the husband. It's best to rule out things all at once to progress with your family building plans. Many who have been diagnosed with fertility problems will tell you to sit down with your family doctor, take a list of questions and concerns and ask for recommendations. It is extremely important for both men and women to participate in these appointments and ask questions.
1 in 8 Couples Affected
- Family Choices | Interactive map of fertility and infertility
Explore fertility and infertility rates around the globe. Produced by PRI's The World and Pulitzer Center.
- Infertility in Men - In-Depth Report - NY Times Health
- Myths and Facts About Infertility - RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association
- Infertility | FertilityAnswers
Patience, Persistence and Planning
From my personal experience, my diagnosis came early, at age 13. This was long before pregnancy was something that ever crossed my mind. There wasn't a lot known about my condition back then and because of my age my parents didn't concern themselves with looking into my diagnosis, PCOS (poly cystic ovarian syndrome), and what the future might hold. Fast forward to the future and it took my husband and I about 2 years to conceive and welcome our son. After his birth, the PCOS really reared its ugly head and there's been no slowing it down. Our son will be 12 years old in 8 months. We've been trying to conceive baby #2 for nearly 10 years. Some couples would have already given up hope. We redirected our focus. The thought is still there. But we were blessed to have Son-shine and adoption is the path we chose, in addition to still working with doctors, to grow our family.
From my experiences, I can tell you that even making those initial doctors appointments can be a task. Ultimately, the doctor can make or break the situation. For example: It's challenging for me to lose weight or keep it off with my diagnosis. In the past, when I have scheduled appointments to discuss my options the first thing I heard was to lose some weight and then come back in a few months. It's extremely discouraging to have someone look you over, make an assumption without even flipping open your chart, and then brush you off. I have been bulied into taking medications, like birth control, despite the fact that I'm trying to conceive because the doctors said it was the only thing to regulate my body. Do not stand for this. Do your research. Look into your symptoms, find support groups. Social media is a very powerful thing and can lead to great resources. Research doctors. Finding the right doctor might take some time, but be patient - I know it's hard. Be persistent in your quest for the perfect healthcare provider for you and your situation. I am on my 7th family doctor, general practitioner, because of this. I can tell you that I am so happy that I "shopped around". My current doctor is an absolute gem and we are making a lot of progress. Remember: The biggest advocate for your health and well-being is yourself.
Pregnancy & Fertility Quiz
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Infertility is a heavy topic, but here are some lighthearted links on the subject :)
- Weird Things Couples Do To Get Pregnant
Let's make a baby. Or die trying...
- Men, Ice Your Balls To Make Babies—and Other Male Fertility Fixes - The Daily Beast
How can men take charge of their fertility problems? By keeping everything cool down there—including your skivvies.