Child Development Through Good Parenting
Even well-seasoned parents sometimes needs to understand the extreme importance of good parenting and what it really entails. Ninety Percent (90%)of the time, your child turns out based upon how he/she is grown and behavior instilled upon them from within the home. There are some basic skill set that all parents must know and do in order to call themselves a good parent. Good parenting skills is not being a giving machine. Neither is it being a withholding machine, but to simply find a balance between the two and basically filling any void being created by communication and love.
Child Development Stages
I had asked this question earlier and many people may wonder what the difference between growing and raising a child is. When you raise a child, you oversee the child's every growth process step by step providing love and guidance through each phase of growth. Every phase of growth of your child requires a different parental portal, channel, or raise method to deal with that stage. What would be alright for you to say to a eight year old may not transcend onto something that a teenager will need or wants to hear. The child passes through different growth stages and as such will require different levels of parenting skills and different approach to raising them. The stages of a child growth and different methods to raise your child are as follows:
- Baby - 0 to 12 Months
At this stage, all you can do is ensure that the child is properly watched, cared for and nourished. This is the first stage of bonding between parent and child. Use this stage to express deep love and care that will seep deep into the child's subconscious. Many people believe that because they don't remember their baby stages that babies do not remember events or treatments in their lives. Many people however do remember their baby stages quite vividly.
- Toddler 1 to 3 years
Ensure that your child receives a lot of attention during this transformation. Allow him/her to do things for himself and look at his developing personality. Pay special attention to toddlers as these are very curious and this is one stage that they tend mostly to put things in their mouth. Try to guide your child about basic do's and don’ts s even from this stage. Don't think that he will not understand because at this stage they understand more than you think. My example is don't laugh when he throws the cat in the television, simple tell him no and show him how to handle the cat.
- Preschool 3 - 6 years
You toddler has grown and now begins to express him/herself even more. This stage may even require you to have better conversations with your pre-schooler. Always instil stages of guidance, love and discipline at every level of growth. They are wanderers and imaginers at this stage and many build worlds of fantasy and illusion. Get on the boat with it and promote their imagination, play with them, have dad dress up in that pink apron for the imaginary tea party. At this stage they are avid players and extremely active. Their diet of course must be monitored and changed to suite this stage.
- Grade-schooler 5- 10 years
The child now has to be given greater responsibility in her own little world. The need for having their own space suddenly becomes an issue as they become more aware of themselves and their surroundings. This is also a very tender stage, at this stage parents must foster self confidence in their child allowing and watching them to do things on their own and if erred, point out where they went wrong and encourage them to do better. Always constantly let them know that they are loved and appreciated. Give them positive rewards for their efforts made.
- Teen 13 - 19 Years
Adolescence can be a challenge for many parents. This is what i call the shouting years. They are going through a phase and become very much more aware of their sexuality and feelings. Their hormones are high and many will try to quench their feelings. They are even easier to influence at this age and many do get influenced because of peer pressure from friends and societies glamorous and glitters life style. As a parent, you must sit down your child and have a serious discussion about their teenage years and how to cope with pressures exerted on them. Let them even know the law applied when teenagers do things illegally as many believe that it is cool to break the law. Build a relationship where your son or daughters see you as the first person to come to when facing difficult challenges. At this stage they are delicate and try to create a unique style for themselves. There may be many conflict between parents and teen at this stage, but the best thing to day is sit and have serious yet loving discussions with your teenager. Don't be afraid or ashamed to ask for guidance or counselling for your child if you believe that the situation requires that. Also, give your teen space to grow, their own space is really important. Teen years can be sad, happy fun and even exciting once teen and parent understand each other.
Young adult 20 to 25
Are they still at home? They should either be off to college or working at this age and either out of your home or looking to move out. At this age they are adults who are capable of making their own life choices and as such should. If you have a child who lives with you at this age, it is important to remember that they are adults and your guidance should only be optional, not the doctrine! At this age you begin to see quite little of them if at all as they venture on their own to make you grandparents
Parents Must Practice Being Parents
As a new or experienced parent, you must always be in the know regarding your child and his or her activities. There is nothing wrong in giving your child space to grow and develop, but that space given can become so wide and UN monitored that it may lead to parental negligence. Here are some important things that all parents must be in the know about:
Observe your child and look for any changes in his or her movements. Sometimes all it takes is a simple hand on the forehead to know if your child is ill. Monitor your child's health.
There are so many parents who are unaware of what their child does on the way from school. At some point in time you must go observe your child and see what he or she does when heading home. So many children get into trouble simply created mischief that they think is cool.
- Know your child's friends
Many children become influenced to do wrong by other children who may be having problems at home or simply neglected by parents. Cut your child from any bad influences and if you know if your child's friend who encourages him/her to do wrong. Speak with the school so they can contact the parent to find out what's happening. You may have just saved a child's life.
- Monitor Home Internet Activities
This is important as many children meet child molesters online who pose as even innocent children to lure them away to meet and kidnap and destroy these little souls. Install adult filtering software on computers so your child can browse the internet more securely.
Encourage Respect and Value
You must encourage your child to value him/her self and let them know they are unique. Teach them to respect themselves and respect other people as well and never do to others what they would not want anyone doing to them. The value of once self is very important to the decisions you make and teens to young adults need to practice more self-value for them to make positive and better decisions.
7 Point Parental Pointers
- Express Love to your Child
- Give them Space to Grow
- Talk To Your Child
- Commit Discipline Where Necessary
- Motivate and Encourage Them
- Lead By Example
- Keep in The Know
Being a parent is a full time job that you get no monetary benefit for. But you get something much better than that, the love that your children bring and the joy of seeing them grow to being fine and decent people. Remember as a parent you must also lead by example and if you do lead a very questionable lifestyle, don't push that life upon your children, and instead try to give them a good opportunity to make something wonderful of themselves.
© 2017 Clive Williams