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Is Child Punishment, Child Abuse?
Disciplining your children
Have you disciplined your children today? have they done something wrong recently that has made you so angry or upset that a punishment was the only way to deal with your child's behaviour?
How you discipline your children when their behaviour warrants it can be a bit of a science in its-self, too soft and your child will think that their deed was worth doing again, too hard and you could cross the fine line between child punishment and child abuse.
Most parents would love it if their children were perfect angels 24/7/365 but this will never be the case in reality, children will never know right from wrong if they are not allowed to make mistakes of judgement in the first instance.
No matter how many times you tell your child not to go near the radiator because it is hot and they could, burn their fingers they will not listen until they have touched that radiator for themselves and learned a nasty lesson.
When you become a parent the words No and Don't become the most used in your vocabulary, No Don't touch that, No Don't do that.
Hold your hands out boy!
Corporal Punishment (physical)
When I was a child, a very long time ago I was often given a little slap on the leg or the wrist as punishment when I did something that my parents felt crossed the line. to me it was a shock every time but the punishment was quick effective and I would never repeat the deed that I had been punished for.
Today if i gave one of my kids a slap on the leg or wrist I would have the police and social workers at my door in a flash taking my children away and getting charged with child abuse.
When I was at school, again a very long time ago, and I did something to upset a teacher, that teacher would reach into a drawer of his desk pull out a leather strap about a centimeter thick ask me to raise my hands and would hit my hand with the strap again instant punishment and very effective.
Teachers are not allowed to use the strap these days because it is considered a form of child abuse.
Of course before the strap teachers would use a cane and whip your buttocks. If a teacher even thought of trying this or using a strap these days they would be arrested and never allowed to work with children ever again.
Corporal punishment is frowned upon by society these days and can be considered crossing the line, hitting a child because they have done wrong should be avoided at all cost although I have turned out OK and many others of my generation and generations before us have turned out OK too.
Punishing a child by hitting them sends out mixed signals you did something wrong therefor i will hit you teaching your child that it is alright to hit someone else if they have done something wrong.
The writng is on the wall
Non Physical Punishment
Non Physical punishment such as grounding is a more popular and more socially acceptable form of punishment these days.
As a Parent again You are Grounded has become a large part of my vocabulary.
There came a time when my parents realised that the slaps on the leg or hand, to punish me for my wrong doings, were having little or no effect anymore because I was bigger and the shock factor was no longer an issue. the had to come up with a new form of punishment which would make me think before I did anything like that again.
You are Grounded became my worst enemy, actually I became my own worst enemy because i was behaving like a spoiled brat at the time, but when i was grounded I was sent to my room where there was literally nothing to do except look out of the window and watch all of the other children playing or lay on your bed and stare at the ceiling.
Two days of being grounded really did teach me a lesson although I think that is where my inspiration to write came from, the imagination runs wild when you have nothing whatsoever $6 to do.
Other forms of non-physical include taking away TV privilages, taking away their favorite toy, reading the riot act (a good old lecture explaining the rights and wrongs) and in education teacher give detentions or lines, writing out one hundred times (I must not do what I did ever again or I will be made to rewrite this out a thousand times more.)
What's your view on punishment?
which method of punishment is most effective on your children
Today when i punish my children i hit them where it hurts.
My daughter loves her android phone and really can't live without it, when she crosses the line I take it away from her for a whole day or even as much as a week depending on the severity of her misdemeanor. it is a very effective punishment which helps her to see the error of her ways.
My son spends more time with his beloved xbox than he spends breathing you can guess just how effective taking it away is when he has crossed the behavioral line.
My second son has a PSP and a Nintendo ds which go everywhere with him removing these keeps him on his best behavior.
My youngest who is just over a year old now has learned the words from the top of this page No and Don't.
Every parent has differing views on how to properly punish their children, whether it takes the form of Corporal punishment or even just lecturing your child about the rights and wrongs of what they have done.
Most Parents find a way to punish their children which does not harm them physicaly or emotionaly but it is effective and although in the words of the children "That is so unfair" we are leading them on the right path for the future and teaching them right from wrong.
Feel free to ad your two cents on child punishment in the comments box below, do you have a unique way to discipline your children that works every time? or do you blame the state of society today on the lack of parents and teachers using corporal punishment?