Close to death after birth
When I found out I was pregnant with my sixth child I can't even begin to explain the emotions I had. First of all I wasn't suppose to be able to have more children, I was also on birth control and I hemorrhaged when I had lost a baby two years earlier. I knew being pregnant again was such a huge risk and I was in the beginning of my divorce.
I talked to my friends about it and they all agreed it was way to risky for me and for my other five children to loose me if I decided to keep the baby. I was in a state of fear and panick because with my personal believes I couldn't just get rid of my child. I went to the Dr. and was given a sonogram and I saw my babies beautiful heart and I knew my miracle baby was going to stay. I was immediately referred to the high risk Dr. because I had a complete placenta previa. With my fear of hemorrhaging again this really didn't help at all.
The high risk Dr. told me they would take my child at 36 weeks via cesarea And have blood ready if I started to hemorrhage. The fact that I knew they would have the blood ready made me feel a little comfort since this was always my biggest fear. I was advised the chances of a complete previa resolving was very low and again Dr's were wrong. I went in again at 27 weeks to find out my placenta had moved just enough to have a natural labor.
So now I'm back to my birth plan and wanting to do a natural child birth and drug free. With it being my sixth child I was already feeling really overwhelmed and had been on bed rest for a long time. Once it was starting to calm down I started to show signs of pre-eclampsia. My blood pressure spiked and I had protein in my urine. I had to do extra tests and sent to the hospital for extra testing. Well just like everything else with this pregnancy it seemed to just resolve itself. I had been beating the odds one obstacle at a time.
I went in for my 37 week check up and with size of baby had my induction set for 39 weeks. I went in that morning with my Mother and started poticin as planned. it all started so normal but in the back of my mind I couldn't shake that I was going to die having my child. I had nightmare after nightmare about hemorrhaging having my baby. Who could blame me after the last experience I had being pregnant and with all the information I had been given.
I went to get a epidural because my Dr. said would be best. I won't go into that much detail but he basically messed up and it didn't take. The baby at this point is stuck above my hip bone and the pain is for sure the worse I had ever experianced in any of my deliveries. It was around this point when my fears started to become very real. When I would have a contraction at the very peak I would get very light headed and almost black out. It felt almost like I was being hit by something and this scared me even more.
The staff couldn't find any reason I was feeling this way and gave me oxygen to try to calm me down. With the pain still insanely high because of amount of poticin and all the issues it was finally time to push my beautiful baby out. I remember looking at the Dr. helping before mine showed up telling him he better catch her because I'm pushing fast. I'm not sure if he thought I was kidding but three big pushes and she was here. My Dr. was standing behind the other Dr. when she came into this world.
I had wanted the skin to skin contact right away after delivery and they passed her on top of me. All the sudden I felt my Dr. pushing and pulling on me and working very fast. I didn't think much of it at first then he told the nurse to take the baby. The nurse looked at me and said "we're going to clean her up and we will bring her back". I looked at my Mother and said "something is wrong with the baby because they took her too fast". I remember the look in my Mothers face and I had never seen that look before and it scared me.
I told her to go get my baby because I wanted to see her. My Mother was refusing to leave my side then looks at me and says "please don't leave us". The pain was starting to fade and I could feel my body getting weak. I knew at this point it was me and I was in trouble. I heard the Dr. making orders and working on me fast. My 14 year old son had a fear I would never come home after having the baby and had made me promise him I would come home. I couldn't stop thinking that I would break my last promise to him and I was so sad because I knew that this would hurt my children so much.
The room had a window and I could see the top of the trees and I remember looking at them thinking this just can't be it because I'm just not ready. My Dr. asks me if I have asthma and I told him yes and he puts his head down and says "we can't give her that" then he looks up and says "give it to her anyways I'll take the consequences". Whatever he injected me with worked fast because the bleeding was starting to stop. The mixrure of stuff they had done manually and drugs were working. Once things had calmed down my Dr. explained what happened. He advised me to breastfeed as soon as possible and for aslong as possible to have my uterus start contracting. This was going to help keep the bleeding from coming back.
I was given a few blood transfusions and had a extended hospital stay but I was alive and I beat all the odds. I'm writing this crying and holding my now three month old baby girl and being so thankful God blessed me in so many ways. My daughter helped save my life the same way I gave her life. When I had her I was reborn with the fear of the end so soon. My life will never be the same in so many ways. I'm just so thankful I almost died so I could become a better person.