ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Dr. Laura ism's

Updated on August 20, 2014

Dr. Laura Schessinger

I listened to Dr. Laura way back in the day on AM radio. This was before I had ever married, or had a child.

OK, let's face it, I didn't know jack shit back then, but I certainly thought I did. Or at least I tried to let the world think I did

- know jack shit that is.

And I certainly had an opinion about Dr. Laura. Can we say beee aaaah tch!

Well not back then, that phrase wasn't even around.

Why did I think she was a beee aaaah tch?

You know back then - I honestly don't even remember what I thought of her ideas, suggestions or advise. I just remember being completely turned off by how blunt she was with her callers. Being the people pleaser that I was I could not possibly imagine coming across to anyone in this way.

The hear and now

Hearing Dr. Laura now, I realize I'm like a lot of people who call in and tell her, "I just found you again on Sirius!"

Just to be clear, I don't agree with Dr. Laura on every issue, like her political points of view, and a few other hot button issues.

But I LOVE what she has to say about relationships, kids and family.

So now, rather than just hearing her, I am actually listening to the Dr. Laura show.

Here are my five favorite Dr. Laura ism's

Number 1

"Choose wisely, treat kindly"

Choose wisely when choosing a spouse, then treat kindly.

Now choosing wisely means making an educated choice, which means asking questions, having discussions and learning about the other person.

Did I take the time to learn about the other person? Did I ask questions? Uh... not really, no. My main driving force was - are you ready - LUST. You never acted on this impulse? Really? Never?

It wasn't until Hubby number 3 that I took my time and asked questions. Thing one and Thing two husbands? Well lets just leave it at that.

Number 2

"I am my husband's girlfriend"

Dr. Laura says, "From their mothers to their girlfriends to their wives, men look to women for attention, affection and approval. That's why women have all the power in relationships..."

Number 2.5:

"She's my woman. He's my man."

I love when Dr. Laura uses these terms. It implies ownership, not in a possessive way, but in a protective way. When you treat kindly, and yet look out for the needs of "your man," how tempted will he be to stray?

Some women even go so far as to say, "I am my husband's sex kitten" Now what man wouldn't LOVE that!!

So listen up Bee aaah tch's! Once you realize this is true, it's easier to treat kindly


Number 3

"I am my kids mom"

This is really the most important one in my book. Especially since there are so many of us that have screwed up in the marriage department.

Which screws up the kidlets.

Actually, this is my most favorite thing about Dr. Laura. This Bee aaah tch not only believes that children come first, she points out all of the ways we may think we are putting our children first, when we are not.

No institutionalized day care, or even Pre-K. Children need full time mommies. That's what it means to be your kid's mom.

Many mom callers point out how scared they are to quit working. Dr. Laura very adamantly points out that children confront scary things every day. Going to school is scary, stepping up to bat the ball, playing a piece at the piano recital, not coming in last at the swim meet, getting teased by other kids, getting ready for school by themselves.

SO many things that are scary for children. COME ON PEOPLE! Put yourself in the child's place.

She is absolutely right about this one.

Number 3.5

"Divorced with minor children? Don't date, have sex or marry until the children turn 18"

Don't date, and especially don't get married. Dr. Laura points out the divorce rate among 2nd marriages is 70%!

I'm all fine with statistics, but the real point here is that dating, second marriages and step parenting is NOT the way to "Put the children first."

Imagine being a kid. Dad has a new wife and kids, they're with him all the time and now I have to share him with them at my "visits." To make matters worse, I have to listen to the new wife, abide by her rules, show respect, etc. Yukk! My feelings hurt just thinking of this.

And if mom re-marries? Some new dude that I have to share the TV, the hot water, the kitchen and the time I had with mom, and now I have to follow his lead? Yeah right. Good Gawd! What if he walks in on me in the bathroom!

Oh Chickens and Biscuits!! Now they're having a kid of their own! Well where the hell do I fit in?

Best scenario, stay in the marriage until the kids are 18 and out. If you have to get divorced then focus on the kids only.

Why do we feel it's OK to put our social life or our sex life for gods sake, above our children?


Number 4

"Blood is NOT thicker than morality"

I love, love, love this quote. So many people call in that have problems with Aunt Bridget the alcoholic, or Brother Bartholomew who rages at people. What about Uncle Farthead the pedophile?

You DON'T have to be around these people, just because they are family. Will other family members be upset? Yep - oh well.

On more than one occasion I've heard Dr. Laura reference Charles Manson, "If he was your brother would you still go to the wedding?"

Especially don't bring the kids around to these events. Why would you put them in the position of having to experience the alcoholism or raging? Or chancing it with the swept under the rug pedophile?

Don't have kids and you HAVE to go? "Smile and be nice"

The main message being - don't get so invested! If you go to a family event and you know there's going to be trouble, don't argue.

When I was a bartender I was taught to never argue with a drunk. "There's an alien in the corner with an elephant? Oh, that's nice. No I'm sorry you can't have another drink."

Number 5

"Now go do the right thing."

Dr. Laura closes the show with this comment. How hard is it to do the right thing?

Well it can actually be pretty confusing. We may think we are doing the right thing, especially when you figure in all the messages that society gives us.

How many people have thought they had to get divorced because children don't want to see there parents unhappy? We fool ourselves into thinking little Salmon will be happier when parents have an additional spouse and he goes from an in tact family to visits with his own parents.

Adults who have children should be mature enough to know how NOT to let the kids see they're unhappy. Putting the kidlets first, that would be the right thing.

Society has consistently given the message that working moms are OK. Day care is OK. No matter how much little Apple cries when you leave her at daycare.

Society easily accepts that step parenting is normal for children.

Oh that Bee aaah tch, ahem, Dr. Laura - she seems to have a handle on doing the right thing.

OK, it was a little over five

But who's counting?

Learning the hard way

If I'd have tuned in to that Bee aaah tch years back, would things be different? Probably.

In fact if I had tuned in prior to getting married to Thing One or Thing Two, or prior to having a child, I'm certain she would have helped me a lot.

If you've ever called Dr. Laura and been on her program, I would love to hear from you.

Now go do the right thing.

Dr. Laura's radio program

Have you ever listened to Dr. Laura?

See results


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • Hankscita profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from Florida

      Thank you Breonna. I don't always agree with her, and sometimes I'm still put off by how she talks or the way she comes across. I try to take what I can and learn from it. Thanks for reading my Hub!

    • profile image

      Breonna hayes 

      4 years ago

      I agree with all of the Dr. Laura isms yes some of her things she talks about I don't like but yes there are a lot of callers that help with all of my everyday issues!!! I think the whole blood isn't thicker than water is just wonderful I have personally experienced that first hand

    • Hankscita profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from Florida

      Thank you fpherj48! Thank you for the comment and the welcome. Very much apprectiated.

    • fpherj48 profile image


      4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

      I will confess, I took the time to seriously listen to Dr. Laura more than twice. Both times must have been particular issues that she and I are worlds apart from in terms of opinions/beliefs.

      I was totally turned off by her opinions, advice and attitude. I am sorry to say that she came off very blatantly as mightier/holier than thou, judgmental and condescending.

      I will also admit that this was more than a decade ago and I have not listened to her since. Perfectly willing to agree that people do "change"...I may see her differently now.....don't really know.

      I do know that I thoroughly enjoy your writing style. This was fun to read from beginning to end. The Doc's quotes are common sense & based in morality for certain. I like that.

      Going on to read your bio and follow you, Sandy. Welcome to Hubpages!!...UP+++Pinned & Tweeted & Shared

    • Hankscita profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from Florida

      Thank you honey! To those who are wondering why I would comment on my own Hub. This was my hubby reading my Hub on my page. So this was really his comment.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)