- Family and Parenting
Eulogy of a Mother
Bubble hunting is a family activity
When in doubt: write it out. All the reasons your life is so great will remind you of the real reason you are living.
As stubborn and full of life as Rose was, it is a wonder that she ever died. Rose was well known for her obstinate ways, but she was also known for her kindness and her delight in her family. At any time that someone was in need, Rose would throw open her door and loudly proclaim that they must be hungry, come in and let’s talk about it. The whirlwind that would follow is one where you knew that you at the least were no longer hungry; at the best you knew you had her support.
Rose stood on many committees during her school career, mostly to fuel this addiction to argument. Few people who met her were aware of this stubborn streak until they did or said something that Rose thought was unfair or not right. By being obstinate, she gathered a great deal of pleasure from arguing. She would try to convince you that the sky was teal and listen to the argument with glee. The only person she would not argue with was her own husband, claiming that it gave her a headache to disagree with him. It is great relief to see that her own son is following in her footsteps in this. She would often butt heads with him over trying to convince him that she was in charge and not him. She was so proud of him.
Why write my own eulogy?
I think all parents go through self doubt at some point. I hit a real low trying to balance college, jobs, and motherhood. No matter how marvelous my husband was about it I still felt like I was failing some aspect of the paragon of perfection. I came to a very long and hard realization that my house may be dirty, my dishes undone and no Martha Stewart may be in sight but I didn't have to beat myself up about it.
The wonderful little boy didn't see a dirty house but he remembers the pirate ship we built out of sheets and the arts and crafts we spent hours making. It was more important to spend time doing something with him then cleaning the house and doing nothing fun. Over time, things balanced out including my guilt but this eulogy was a tool along that path.
I love you.....
Many have said that Rose was essentially a mom. She took this idea in stride, carrying with her the much needed tissues, hand sanitizer, or Leatherman tool. She would often have whatever was needed on hand, just in case. She had always been known to show her appreciation for others by carrying the things they needed just as she always had an idea of how to fix problems.
Everyone who met her would know instantly that she was very much in love with her husband. Many people who knew the couple well called it sickening in a romantic kind of way. Both were aware that they each had faults but were capable of compromising to ensure they were both happy. And she was happy; with Daniel at her side she felt she could handle anything. If Daniel was the source of Rose’s confidence then their son, William, was the source of her delight. Whenever she could, Rose would come up with an idea to entertain William and keep the childlike wonder alight in both of them.