- Family and Parenting
Hurtful Words- Deep Scars!
Devil Child wears Pink!
Freckle Face in Tears!
When I was a young girl I was called "Freckle Face" by other kids that wanted to hurt or tease me; we all know that kids can be cruel. I remember one time in particular when my family and I had been invited to the birthday party of the son of some family friends. The birthday boy (Sean) was the same age as myself. I loved going to birthday parties where I would get to dress up in a pretty dress and shoes to match. I would also get to pick out some pretty ribbons for my hair; which my mother would fix up in a special way that was reserved for special occasions such as birthday parties. I got a new pink sparkly dress, pink shoes and some lovely pink ribbon to wear to the upcoming birthday party.
Matching Sparkly Pink Dresses
I wasn't allowed to wear my new outfit until the day of the party; it was only a couple of days away but it seemed like an eternity to me at the time. My mother wore a dress that was made of the same sparkly material as mine as well as a lovely pair of pink high heels. Our outfits were different styles but we looked like the Queen and the Princess in Pink on the day of the party.
When the day of the party finally came I was so filled with excitement that I bugged my mother from when I got up until the moment she finally let me put on my new dress. I could barely sit still as my mother fixed my hair in a bun with my lovely pink ribbons. I pretended I was a real princess as I danced around with excitement waiting for my family to finish getting ready.
Anticipated Birthday Party
At last we were ready my mother and I in our matching outfits and my dad and brothers in their finest, (which didn't compare to the Queen and Princess of Pink) we headed off to Sean's much anticipated birthday party.
Birthday Cake without Flowers
I was walking on air as I thought about all the lovely treats that we would be eating at the party especially the birthday cake. I remember wondering if there would be flowers on Sean's cake and if so I was hoping to get a flower on my piece. The cake ended up not having flowers on it but believe you and me it did not deter me from eating every bit of my slice of cake. The party was going wonderfully or so everyone thought as it had all the elements of a good birthday party such as food, games and dancing. Then all of a sudden the party had a turn for the worse!
Demon Child in Pink!
Sean the birthday boy asked me to dance with him; everyone thought this was so cute until they heard my awful response! I answered in a cold voice "I am not allowed to dance with Chocolate boys!" I know at that moment my parents had wished that the floor would have opened up and swallowed them; I really had shocked and embarrassed them that day. I would like to point out that we were the only white family at this party; our friends were from Ceylon, the other guests were all relatives. This comment I had made seemed even worse given the circumstances. I remember the shocked faces that surrounded me including my own family not believing what had just came out my mouth. They were probably thinking this Demon child should be dressed in Red not Pink!
Leaving in Shame
My parents tried to get me to apologize to Sean but at this point I had clammed up and had drawn into myself. My parents apologized to the hosts and their son for my awful behavior and with that I was rushed out of the door as the party was over for me at this point. My parents led my brothers and I to the family car both filled with shame and embarrassment from my appalling hurtful words that I had said to the birthday boy.
Well the car ride home was filled with both my parents spewing out the anger they felt towards me and my awful behavior. I sat quietly in the back of the car with silent tears rolling down my freckled face. They did not understand what would make me say such a hurtful thing. Well they were about to find out as I errupted shouting out that Sean had called me "Freckle Face" first so I wanted to hurt him like he had heart me. My family was well aware about how sensitive I was about my freckles and how hurt I felt when ever anyone called me "Freckle Face". This at least let them understand better why I had said what I said to Sean. My mom was always for "two wrongs don't make a right"; as I am now older and wiser I agree with her. At that time in my childhood I just reacted using the defense mechanism I knew as a six year old child.
Phone call of Appologies
I remember my mum calling and talking to Grace (Sean's mum) explaining the whole situation; she then asked Grace to put Sean on the line as I wanted to apologize he was told to do the same. We both reluctantly appologized to each other under the watchful eyes of our mothers; who made sure we said the right thing to one another this time round.
Stop Bullying of Any Kind!
I am glad to say that both our families remained good friends sharing many family parties after that one for many years to come. We all must remember that words can be just as painful or even more so than getting a direct punch in face. We must try and put a stop to bullying of any kind; if we see it happening in our communities we must take immediate action to help stop it!