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Homecoming and Prom Dresses Can Look Too Provocative for Middle School

Updated on April 6, 2013

Too Mature for 14 Year Olds!

Does Glitter and Gold Beads Compliment Your Look?

My daughter was asked to go to a freshman home coming. She was elated she was asked. Girls at this age love shopping for dresses that are for special occasion. For years when she was little she would glance over at the pretty dresses and could not wait to be old enough to wear one. Now that she is old enough to wear one, the styles the designers manufacturer are in my own observation too adult, glitter, sleazy, tight , short and just not appropriate for some girls.

I no prude, I am the farthest from that. But when it comes to fashion, I think teen girls should dress with a teensy bit of modesty. I think most mom's would agree. But the fashion choices are limited. So many of the dresses just exploit our teen daughters. It sells sex....not beauty.

Today I took her dress shopping. We went to Dillard's and most dresses were off-the-shoulder or all covered in gold polyester, gold sequins and beaded sequins.They reminded me of the disco era; a nightclub dress.

So many of the dresses I saw were also in shocking shades of reds and blues, too tight and and some so short in the hem, your daughter's buttock cheeks would be exposed if she bent over. Some girls at this age are not in a B cup, "How in the world can they wear those strapless dresses without over padding the breast area?"

I told my daughter, "Many girls chooses dresses that make them look like walking flashlights or Christmas trees." All girls want to be noticed. It is a very special occasion. But choose carefully because you have 30 sec. to make an impression and no one forgets. "Too much flash isn't always the most glamorous."

You can not escape those strapless dresses. Most strapless dresses look too sexy and adult. I am not so sure i want my 14 year old at home coming with a hormonal freshman boy. As parents we have to draw the line or hope that our daughters have some sense to dress feminine and not dress like they want to be a sex kitten at age 14.

Too Sexy at This Age

I want to know where are the dresses that bring out the beauty of the person.I thought to myself, the dress should compliment a girl and act as as an accent to the natural beauty of the girl. The other concern is date rape. If your daughter is dressed so provocatively, "Who is at fault?" We all know at this age hormones are raging in boys. I would rather be on the safer side and have my daughter dress less sexy than to hear that a boy could not control himself because her dress was too short and her boobs hanging out. We as parents have a some responsibility in the examples we set forth.

Found a Dress at Charlotte Russe

We walked into Charlotte Russe out of curiosity. We do not normally shop there. I have always thought of Charlotte Russe as more adult. Their merchandise borders adult/older-teen/post college. The price points are somewhat reasonable and in my opinion very trendy.

My daughter found a dress in tank style with a netted bareback. The color is a soft pink/peach with a brush of gold imprinted on the fabric. The lines are clean and simplistic and perfect for a 14 year. My only obstacle was find a bra that would stick on with no straps. I thought i found a bargain until I walked into Victoria Secret and purchased the stick on bra. I could only justify the expensive cost by the fact that she will be attending more dances. You are supposed to get at least 6-8 wears from this bra. The sales clerk was imperative about following the directions on use. Yes, i could have purchased the cheaper disposables, but I was concerned about fit as well as how they would stick while dancing. The Victoria Secret brand is suppose to stick while you are dancing up a sweat. I have to admit I was shocked about the cost. The bra cost more than the dress. Some one should come out with a brand that is half the cost.

Simple with a Hint of Gold Woven in the Fabric Details

What girl doesn't loves shoes? We found the perfect pair at DSW Shoes. I suggested to my daughter that we find a pair of shoes that are gold tone, this way the shoes can be worn again for other dance occasions.

Shoes and Earrings

Accessorizing the dress

This dress can be super dressy or more casual depending on the accessories. She only wanted to wear earrings and a ring. My daughter said when you wear a necklace it jumps when you jump and bracelets get in the way.

She chose geometric shape gold-tone earrings and a ring to wear. The earrings are long. It can be worn with your hair up or down. My daughter is wearing it down foe the event.

Netted Back to Waist

BackLess Brassierre from Victoria Secret

A Netted Dress Back Requires a Different Bra

Well, after she tried the dress on and I looked at her back. We realized it was netted. Obviously you can wear a regular bra which would mean purchasing a stick-on bra. I, at first did not know if we could find one for her being an A-cup. I could have bought the cheap disposables, but after looking at the package, I had this fear that it would not stick. It would have been utterly embarrassing if the bra fell down while dancing. The sales associate assured me that brides wear them.

Across the corridor at the mall was Victoria Secret. We went to the bra experts. We purchased one that would get multiples wears. I think the lady said at least 8. The key is to follow instructions. You are wondering how hard can it be. It isn't. Just don't slather on body lotion. It will make it less sticky. Keep those clear plastic tabs. You have to reapply them to bra when not in use.

Cellphone Bag or Clutch Bag?

It will depend on your daughters preferences and habits. My daughter doesn't wear lipstick, carry perfume or powder. She does carry a cell phone. A cellphone bag might do the trick.

Hair and Nails

My daughter is lucky I am professional stylist and so I can save a bundle on hair. I know some girls go to a salon and get those services done. I will paint her nails for her or she can do it with a friend.

Where to Shop

We tried on 40 dresses. Dillards had the most in my area. My daughter did not like any of the dresses she tried on at Dillards. Many of the boutique store chains like Forever 21, H & M have several really fun dresses that can be dressy depending on how you accessorize. The nice thing at those stores is you can get great things for great prices. Most girls will never wear the same dress twice. The fall formal is not as dressy as the winter formal. You can get away with a shorter dress.

The Cost for Each Dance

Imagine spending $50 for a bra and $26 for a dress. YES! I was taken by surprise. I looked at the bra as an investment for future dances with strapless dresses. I think I did pretty good coming in under $135 for her ensemble. But I have seen dresses as high as $150.

I don't know what winter formal will be. I just know that If I am going to buying all these dresses, they have to be appropriate for her age, they should compliment her and be within a budget.


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    • Writer Fox profile image

      Writer Fox 

      5 years ago from the wadi near the little river

      I enjoyed reading about your personal shopping experience for this event. I just go online instead of to the Mall!

    • RichieMogwai profile image

      Richie Mogwai 

      6 years ago from Vancouver

      Fantastic article. I will definitely come back to read more. By the way, we have nice shops here in Vancouver that specialize in those types of clothing, like the one at the Tinseltown mall, oh in fact there are two. You can get these clothes on average for like $30 a piece. And as for the bras and other underwear, I think a $10 or $15 budget would suffice say, at La Senza. La Senza specializes in sexy lingerie I know but they do have some classical cuts I have seen like the ones in your picture. Oh well, just sharing. Thanks for the article again.

    • alphagirl profile imageAUTHOR


      6 years ago from USA

      Teaches12345, luckily my daughter likes simple clean lines! Thanks for stopping by!

      On another note! After I read your hub about whoopee pies, I

      Then noticed them at the stores! Yum!

    • teaches12345 profile image

      Dianna Mendez 

      6 years ago

      Pretty dress and shoes! I am sure it was a lot of work but she will look stunning on that special day. I remember those days, had to go with the more reasonable cost rather than style. Enjoyed the read!

    • Jackie Lynnley profile image

      Jackie Lynnley 

      6 years ago from The Beautiful South

      I doubt the boys are thinking about their own clothing, lol, watch those girls!

    • alphagirl profile imageAUTHOR


      6 years ago from USA

      Jackie Lynnley, seeing is believeing, but living it with my daughters...the emotionas are high and it makes me crazy. no matter how progressive women are, there still lies the cinderella factor. The I want to be perfect for a boys and look great. I wonder if boys go through this for girls?

    • alphagirl profile imageAUTHOR


      6 years ago from USA

      Add sen.sush23 ,Thanks for voting up and sharing. Welcome to the community!

    • sen.sush23 profile image


      6 years ago from Kolkata, India

      Alphagirl, I don't have a teenage daughter, but I do have nieces and lots of friends with teenage daughters. Several times I have been shocked or surprised at the overtly expensive or loud attires that mothers flaunt on the teensy bodies of their kids. I think your hub, which is very well written both from the style point of view and the parental guidance should strike a note- but I doubt if those who need this advice will really have access to this hub. I wish they would. Some amount of style and good sense need to be infused into teen kids- so that they can grow up and not be dissatisfied with their looks or habits. I really am one who has no prudish considerations in matters of attire - but what makes one look good and feel happy is something that has to be learnt too, just like one's alphabets. Good hub. Voting up and sharing.

    • Jackie Lynnley profile image

      Jackie Lynnley 

      6 years ago from The Beautiful South

      Nice dress, simple and elegant and the shoes and jewelry will set it off! I got to serve at the senior prom when I was a freshman and would you believe with the theme I had to wear a special made dress from about the 1800s! Well it was nice seeing the prom anyway! lol Interesting hub. Up and sharing.


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