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How do you deal when your family is falling apart

Updated on February 12, 2016

How do you deal when your family falls apart?

It is the story of a close family who fell apart because of the newcomers to the family's bad attitude. There was a family of three sons and the mother and the father, they were very united, the mother became the unifier of the family. The father was a head teacher, and the mum stayed at home looked after her husband and the children. The father was a good man, very strict and belonged to the old school. He was so good at his job so that the villagers approached him for private tuitions, so he was forced to do that for some people out of curtsey, and some paid him the money. It was going on for quite a long time, and they were supposed to be well of having a peaceful and happy home. The eldest son James couldn't get into higher education from the University due to some shortfall in the marks for one of the subjects, even though he was clever in his studies. The father was having hundreds of students coming to his house for after school studies but his own faced the failure in his career. His eldest son almost joined the private tutor to help poor students.

His second son Tom went into higher education, and he was favored by everyone at home, particularly the parents. But, with all that, the other two boys did not show any prejudice towards their brother as the mother kept the unity of the family very carefully. therefore, there was no question about the jealousy among the children They were like role models in the village for the other people showing how to live their lives in peace. The attitude that the elder brother had was, I cannot be offended because I couldn't achieve anything and I will be silly to get offended be feel proud of my brother's achievement. The second son got an excellent job with the prospects for further education and advancement in his job. The mum and dad were extremely pleased with this son. The parents John and Linda couldn't foresee that their family will fall apart due to the status difference in their family

How the family is beginning to fall apart?

Let me move on to the third son Peter, he too didn't get into higher education due to too many political issues in the country, but he had all necessary grades to get into higher education. Once the political trauma was temporarily calmed down, Peter managed to get a good job with his existing qualifications but with the prospects of progression. He started working in a different state bit further away from the parents. The family thought now is the correct time for their eldest son James is old enough to get married, the father and the mother were far too old fashioned they never encouraged their children to make their choices. During this time, they had a small old house with some land to the house. The parents decided to give the house to James and the land to be divided between the two younger sons, equally. So, they started hunting for a girl for Tom, the eldest son. After a long search, they found a girl for him and she was a university graduate, so the mum and dad were jubilant over the selection. They arranged the wedding; it took place in the woman' s area, and they moved in here with the James's parents to live, everything went on for a while very smoothly and happily. The happiness didn't last long and who will expect that their first daughter- in-law Sonia will create issues to go to the extent of making her marriage fall apart.

Everything is falling apart

Then the parents, John and Linda, started to think about the second young man Tom and they decided that he should get settled. After the extensive search, they found a woman near the eldest daughter in law's place, but she was bit different compared to Sonia. She was pretty, had a university degree and the family was quite well off. All the arrangements took place, and they had the wedding, so, Tom got married and the second couple also came to live in that small house with the parents. I am the author of this story and not completely aware of the changes in the family; it is normal that anyone will not know about the internal matters apart front the real members of the family. Some reason or the other all the problems started with the family and everything began to fall apart. I think the main reasons were, jealousy, pride and greed, for that small house they had. In the meantime, the mother of the family fell ill, and they were not in a position to get proper treatment for her. The illness went on for a long time, and the eldest daughter in law Sonia started creating significant problems and also threatened them saying that she will go back to her parents as her marriage also has fallen apart. In the meantime, the second daughter in law Cathy was living with her husband on and off. After all these Toms also had some illness, but no one had the proper finances to give treatment to the two sick people the mother and the son Tom. Linda's and Tom's health were deteriorating on a daily basis; there was no proper medical assistance due to lack of funds. James didn't' have a good job, nor he couldn't make significant sums of money. The father was a pensioner, who couldn't keep up with his private tutor, lost the income, so the family couldn't raise the money that they wanted. Mothers health came to the situation beyond repair; there was no money to give a proper treatment. Toms sickness was also deteriorating without the help of appropriate financial assistance. Sonia had many problems, regarding the small house. Then later she decides to move back with her parents. After a couple of months, Sonia and the two children moved out of the husband house and went to her mother's house and told the man where were you when everything was falling apart. The parents were devastated as they were going to miss their grandchildren, knowing her that Sonia will never allow the children visit the grandparents. John pension was spent more or less the medication and food for Linda, and he always had the financial problem.


What did John do, when his family was falling apart.

The family was in great distress, James ‘s wife has left him, a mother was severely ill, Tom was also seriously sick, and the only person who was left behind without any distress was Peter. The father Tom felt that everything has fallen apart and felt helpless, and regretted that enormous mistakes made. But John didn't give up, he advised and helped James to move to an entirely separate accommodation for James and his wife to live away from them. That worked well, and James and Sonia started to live happily in the new place, I guess the reason for Sonia's happiness was, that she was enjoying the independence and she didn't have competition, that was Cathy. John and Linda were able to feel the calmness in the family, but as they became concerned about Tom, they advised Tom to live with his wife in her house as she received a home from the parents. But after a while Linda died John was sad, but he didn't feel the pressure of other problems on top of it. John and Peter lived in that house, and the two sons were visiting them frequently that made John feel happy and came to a conclusion when children get married never bring them into the parents’ house on a permanent basis.

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