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How to emotionally connect to your child?

Updated on February 20, 2013
Connecting with your child
Connecting with your child | Source

How to emotionally connect to your child?

Do you struggle talking to your child? Is parenting becoming a challenge or difficult task? Do you secretly regret having a child? Connecting with child is a parenting skill that can be gained by simply understanding the dynamics behind most basic human relationship, parent and child. Once the basic parenting principles are understood and applied, parent child relationship can be the most awesome relationship where understanding and communication is free flowing on both sides.

Here, I will share some of the principles which can help the parents to connect to their child in easier and efficient ways:

1. Quality time is more important than quantity time with children. It does not depend whether you are busy father, full time mother, working women or homemaker. The important thing is quality time. It can be just 15 minutes in a day where you spend time with your child. If the quality is good, that is all what matters. Many parents might spend whole day with their children without giving them good attention even for a short span and this might be just not useful. When parents want to spend time with children, the key principle is to remove all distractions like mobile gadgets, television and just focus on the child. When we give our attention to our children, our perception power is high. We can understand non-verbal clues of child and our awareness is heightened. This results in good communication and easier flow of ideas between parent and child.

2. Respect your children. It is easier for parents to claim that children do not respect us. However, the most important question that they need to ask themselves is whether they respect their own child. When we respect our children, we don't control them. We respect their ideas and try to understand things from their perspective. It is easier to say that they are wrong and they need to obey what we tell them. Once we give up our right to be right all the time and let go off our false egos, our communication will start in right direction. We will understand more and will empathize more. Once children feel they are understood, they will tend to reciprocate and understand us too. Thus, the free flow of ideas will be smooth and communication will be at deeper levels. This will lead to mutual respect and great problem solving in case of difficult situations.

3. Be positive and think positive. When we are positive, we attract good things. Similarly, when we are positive, children are drawn to us. They are likely to communicate and speak to us if we are good role models of positivity and happiness. If they see us down and depressed, they will most likely withdraw and look outside for good role models whom they truly admire. So, the law of attraction works in parent child relationship too. Parents who are positive, happy and optimistic about life tend to have children who enjoy talking to their parents. Hence, when we take care of our own emotional needs, we will automatically help our children too. Thus, it is important for parents to be happy and emotionally stable before they communicate with their child.

The above principles are simple and easy to be applied in everyday life. Once applied, they can create most beautiful relationship, parent-child to be harmonious and smooth. Parenting is to be enjoyed and not endured. As the famous quote goes, happiness is in the journey, not the destination. Let us not delay our happiness until children become adults and we can enjoy our fruits of labor. That ideal time might never come. The best time to enjoy is present. Let us be happy while we are growing up our children.


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    • Ruchi Urvashi profile image

      Ruchi Urvashi 4 years ago from Singapore

      Thanks Ruchira. I know you are a caring mother for your child and I am glad that this article help you to go even further.

    • Ruchira profile image

      Ruchira 4 years ago from United States

      Useful pointers, ruchi.

      I needed them as my kid is growing, and such useful pointers.

    • Ruchi Urvashi profile image

      Ruchi Urvashi 4 years ago from Singapore

      thanks Torrilynn for your feedback. When we connect with children by spending quality time, life is better for both child and parent.

    • torrilynn profile image

      torrilynn 4 years ago

      really nice hub. the best thing to do as a parent is to connect with your child no matter the refusal you may or may not get. Thanks. voted up.