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How to cope with your teenagers mood swings

Updated on June 28, 2017
Tashaonthetown profile image

Natasha Pelati has published three books of poetry and writes on real-life experiences with the help of psychology.

Puberty, mood swings and teenagers

Teenagers often get confused and irritated as they think that 16 makes them adults but parents with knowledge and maturity understand that their teens have a lot to learn before they go out into the big and scary world.

They are not yet adults and they do not fit into the children's category anymore, making them confused and annoyed.

Puberty takes its toll on your teenagers as there is so much going on with their bodies rapidly developing and hormone levels changing, causing them to have mood swings and irritability.

Patience is needed when parenting a teen because this is the time that they need to learn how to make decisions that have consequences and you need to let them learn from their mistakes.

As a teenager they feel awkward with the rapid changes in their bodies, they sometimes don't fit in with their peers and often feel as though nobody understands them because they feel that they are adults and parents feel that they are not ready to grow just yet.

Hair in strange places, sweat, growing pains and shaving are all attributing factors to your teens mood changes. Hormones can lead them to suddenly have a temper tantrum or get them into a dark and depressive state.

Controlling their behaviour is still important but they need to learn how to survive on the streets without you.

Helpful hints for parents with moody teens

Mood swings are caused by puberty and hormones.

Teenagers get aggitated, irritable, obnoxious, want to rebel and they get emotional.

Depression can be caused by hormonal changes and mood swings.

Let your teenagers know that they need to be respectful.

Allow them freedom to make decisions and have patience when there is a mood swing.

Ensure that they get enough sleep, exercise, healthy diet and sunshine to avoid the "moody blues."

Coping with your teens mood swings

Some days you want to go and open the door that has just been slammed in a raging temper and slap your teen into learning how to be respectful and other days you need to check if they are alive and well.

Most teenagers will occupy themselves in their rooms, listening to music, playing PlayStation or computer games and will spend 99 percent of their day on the cellphone.

Getting a teenager to do anything can be a mission impossible but in order for you and your family to keep your sanity, you need to instill in your teenagers, manners, respect and peace.

This is the age where they will mirror some of your behaviour and they will try to bend the rules, extend their boundaries and try your patience.

Mood swings will occur often due to hormonal changes in the body and if they lash out at you, it is because of that.

For many teenagers growing up and facing adulthood is a challenge as peers and friends can be mean and hurtful. Some teens grow up too quickly in a home where there are no rules, whilst others have learnt that they are given freedom to a certain extent.

Teenagers mood swings stem from peer pressure as they are all allowed different variations of freedom, which might effect their social standings at school.

Do not buckle under pressure and if you think that something is wrong then that is how it is and they will get over the tantrum when the next hormonal change occurs.

When your teen has a mood swing, leave them to storm off and slam the door but sit them down and explain to them what is going on and let them know that you have rules that need to be followed and that there are things that will not be tolerated.

Allow them the opportunity to release their anger or sadness and keep your eye out for the kids that become reserved and introverted or isolate themselves.

Hormone changes don't last too long but you need to observe their behaviour and keep watching for signs of depression.

They feel misunderstood and awkward with the changes that they cannot prevent, causing them to loose it every now and again.

You might even find them shouting at you after you have told them to do something. Ignore this but if it continues regularly then let them know that you are not happy with their behaviour.

Mood swings can also be caused by unexplained pimples or appearance discomfort, which you need to help with if it gets too bad for them to handle.

Teenagers will want to test you and try over step their boundaries; let them know where they stand from the very beginning or you will be in for a bumpy few years.

Their friends will want to go out and meet members of the opposite gender, therefore you need to make certain that they have been told everything there is to know about life, before they make disastrous mistakes that cannot be fixed.

Peer pressure will also cause them to have mood swings, especially if they are not allowed to do what their friends are doing. Stand your ground and let them know that there are rules and specific values in your family that need to be respected.

Teenagers will turn on you and make you feel as though you are the enemy but don't get too sensitive and take it too seriously because at then end of the day, you are the concerned parent who needs to protect your child and they do still have a lot to learn.

Prevent teen mood swings with exercise, sleep and a healthy diet
Prevent teen mood swings with exercise, sleep and a healthy diet

Moody Teenagers and Coping with Them

How to prevent mood swings

To maintain a happy and healthy environment with your teenagers it is important to ensure that they have everything that they need to grow and keep them healthy.

Sleep is extremely important to a teenager and if they do not get the correct amount of sleep, this will fuel their mood swings and also lead to depression.

A healthy diet with nutrients, vitamins, vegetables and fruit are necessary for them to sustain a normal level of behaviour. Double check that they have had breakfast before they go to school.

Exercise is vital for teenagers as they get very lazy during their new adulthood. Lack of exercise can cause them to feel emotional, moody and it is also unhealthy. Exercise increases endorphins which are happy hormones that will automatically put them in a good mood.

Sunshine is a great way to keep your teenager from depression and mood swings as the natural vitamins will keep them happy.

Freedom is complicated as they need to feel free to make their own decisions but they are not ready to make big decisions without you yet. Allowing them a little freedom as they get older is a good idea in order for them to explore and express themselves in the environment with people going on the same journey that they are.

Lay down the law and let them know that you will not tolerate disrespect and that there is a punishment for teens that get out of line.

How do you cope with your teens mood swings?

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Why teenagers have mood swings

Hormonal changes are a big factor in teenagers mood swings. Their bodies are growing at a rapid rate and hormonal levels can increase or decrease in the blink of an eye.

Homework and pressure at school with studying or after school activities can have a negative effect on your teen.

Friends that are also going through puberty might change or grow quicker than your teen, which will result in them feeling awkward and strange. Their friends might also be pressuring them into doing unreasonable things that would make you unhappy.

Hormone changes don't excuse them from wanting to spend time with a member of the opposite sex and this could lead to break ups and heartache, which could leave them feeling moody or miserable.

As their bodies change so does their attachment to you as a parent. You will find that they do not want to spend much time with you, if any at all.

Teenagers mood swings  Source: wordpress
Teenagers mood swings Source: wordpress

Signs of depression in teenagers

With the hormonal changes, rapid growth of body hair and bones, your teen could become a little confused and will hide from the world. Depression is common in teenagers but for many it goes away as they begin to understand their thoughts, actions and standing.

You do need to keep your eyes open and look for symptoms of depression before it is too late.

Depression in teens is common and it usually goes away but it can happen for months and reoccur.

Changes in sleep and appetite, poor school performance or lack of concentration, lack of interest and withdrawal from social activities can be signs of depression.

If depression lasts for more than three weeks than you need to pay attention as they get irritable and agitated a lot more than usual.

Medication needs to be given out by a medical professional and self medicating is something that you should not do. Children with depression need to seek outside help as you cannot understand or help them through it. Avoiding the visit to a psychologist could lead to serious problems and tragic events.

Depression can be caused by a number of events or situations that your teen just cannot cope with and it is important to get them to speak to someone immediately.

It is not the end of the world and teenage depression can be resolved in order for them to lead happy and healthy lives as long as you treat it.

Alcohol is a bad idea and you have got to let your teen know that it is not a good idea to drink.

This also adds to a factor for depression and it will not make things any better, only worse.

Giving your moody teens space

Give your teens some space
Give your teens some space | Source

Teen mood swings

Give your moody teen some space

Teeangers are moody, agitated, irritable and rebellious. This is normal behaviour for a teenager and the best thing that you can do is to develope patience so that you can get through the stage in one piece, without grey hairs appearing on a regular basis.

Let them have some freedom to express themselves and allow them time to unwind and let their hair down as school can be demanding, not only with the work load but with peer pressure too.

Give them time to be with themselves and let them know that you are there to support them and give them advice when they need it.

Your baby is growing up and they are no longer wanting to hold your hand or let you know that they love you in public, accept that and give them all the love that you can give.

Have an Open Communication with your Teens

It is important for your kids to know that no matter what happens they are able to come to you and speak freely about anything.

It is important for you to listen and to avoid judgement while they express their feelings. Once you have heard what they have to say, take a moment or two to process the information and think about how you are going to answer and if this is going to be helpful.

By allowing them to express themselves you are welcoming them to open up and speak to you about what it bothering them without them having to feel judged, even though they will probably feel that way anyway.

It does give them an open door and the words coming out of their mouths might not ne what you would like to hear but just listen and allow them to speak to you no matter what.

This can save so many complications and feelings because you are able to get how they feel without having to guess and you can help them with advice even though they might not want to listen to it.


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    • Tashaonthetown profile imageAUTHOR

      Natasha Pelati 

      5 years ago from South Africa

      Thank you!

    • starme77 profile image


      5 years ago

      This is a really nice hub with some really good advice :) voted up and useful

    • Tashaonthetown profile imageAUTHOR

      Natasha Pelati 

      5 years ago from South Africa

      thank goodness!! wait until she gets to 10 then you have your hands full!

    • Tashaonthetown profile imageAUTHOR

      Natasha Pelati 

      5 years ago from South Africa

      children do need space to move and make their own choices as long as parents are there to catch them when they fall.

    • Tashaonthetown profile imageAUTHOR

      Natasha Pelati 

      5 years ago from South Africa

      wine has become a good friend of mine! teenagers are hard work and it doesnt get any easier!

    • sassypiehole profile image

      Lisa René LeClair 

      5 years ago from the ATL

      Ain't it da troof!

    • Tashaonthetown profile imageAUTHOR

      Natasha Pelati 

      5 years ago from South Africa

      we need to keep a sense of humour lol!

    • sassypiehole profile image

      Lisa René LeClair 

      5 years ago from the ATL

      I'm already grey... Guess I'll end up looking more like Betty White one day. That's okay, at least she's funny! ;-)

    • Tashaonthetown profile imageAUTHOR

      Natasha Pelati 

      5 years ago from South Africa

      Thank you! I forgot to mention that grey hair comes with teens turning 16!

    • Eiddwen profile image


      5 years ago from Wales

      A very interesting and well informed hub which I am sure will benefit many.

      Voted up and shared.


    • sassypiehole profile image

      Lisa René LeClair 

      5 years ago from the ATL

      True dat! I'm going to have my hands FULL when she gets older though. She told me the other day that she's "in love" with two different boys (that's my girl)! Good think she doesn't know what it means (yet)! ;-)

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 

      5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Teenagers have more issues to deal with and parents got to realize the changes and give teenagers the space required. Your hub has helpful parenting tips for teenagers.

    • sassypiehole profile image

      Lisa René LeClair 

      5 years ago from the ATL

      Great. Now I'm concerned that my six-year-old is really 17!

      Thanks for the heads up on what is to come. I think I need a drink now. ;-)


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