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Help Your Kids Overcome Their Fears

Updated on February 20, 2018
Fear | Source

Help your Kids Overcome Their Fears

Kids have different fears. Fears that are considered common among their age. Consider yourself when you were still young and there were so many things bothering you which frightens you to try something new just because you were afraid to do so. Sometimes most of us, we often forget to pay attention to the very least details wherein kids can hardly express themselves, too. This sometime becomes related to our kids emotional stresses. We even forgot what exactly they were afraid of, right after trying to convince them it was just nothing.

Common Fears of a Child

  1. Fantasy
  2. Enemy
  3. Anxiety
  4. Rejection
  5. Scene/Scenario

Fantasy There are two sides of every fantasy in our children, the first gives them happy thoughts that they really enjoy. It helps them to sometimes end up dreaming and fantasizing wonderful things for themselves. While the second one is the evil side to every fantasy wherein some frightful scenarios retained to their memories and leaving kids frightened when it flashes back in mind.

Enemy According to Lawrence Cohen, children were vulnerable to two kinds of pain. It is the normal social and the other is the serious social (pain). While most children experienced the first than the latter. The normal social pain does not continue firmly.

While Michael Thompson, Ph.D. , said that fifteen the percent of kids were vulnerable to extreme social risk, and the other eighty five percent were attacked by social challenge.

Once the child experienced extreme social pain, he/she is already vulnerable to fears.

Anxiety We all knew fears among children changed as they mature. Fears of ghost and ugly creatures such as monster, being injured , afraid of the dark, thunder and lightnings, and anxiety about things that are not reality based.

Rejection The early age of rejection can be seen commonly to those preschoolers. As one grows, this rejection will teach us somehow to misbehave and change varies in many ways.

Scene Some scene that comes from the movie they're watching could be very frightening. Violence, scary faces, emotions, rolling thunder, lightning and sometimes even roars from wild animals.

What should We Do?

  • Give your child sufficient attention. Show them that you understand their fears.You can tell stories from your childhood.Tell them your own childhood fears and how you did face all of them.
  • Ask what is bothering your child.Listen to what your child is trying to tell you. And try to identify things that bothers them which they can't tell.
  • Be aware of their feelings. Be patient when asking so that they may be able to speak their thoughts clearly. Show them you care. Show them you love.
  • Pay attention to them and try to evaluate their fear. Give them a nice explanation why they should not be afraid, or tell them that you always have time for them. That they can come to you at any time of the day.
  • Be their hero. Show your sympathy and caress them with your love. Even adults needs someone that they can trust to. Someone they can lean on.
  • Do not coerce them to instantly remove their fears instead help your kids dare to face those fears
  • Do not laugh or castigate them through their fears. Laughing them can make them feel the worse. It won't help, kids will not open up their feelings when being laughed.
  • You too, should show bravery.
  • You cannot easily keep them away from fearful characters but you should keep their fantasies distinct from real ones.

creativity | Source

Divert the Fears

As children grows, they constantly change their fears. Until such time they can handle their own emotions and manage their own fears. This happens to most individuals.This happens to most of us. Psychologist says, 'Fear' is okay as long as one can help himself recuperate. Our world is now changing, The dilemma of 'before' has already been patched currently by rapid growth of unique ideas on how a child can divert their fears into a unique activity. There are so many activities out there wherein we can let our kids join and help them enhance the creativity inside them. Good thing, some encourage the guardians or the parents to join with the kids. Parents nowadays had so many choices wherein they can leave the kids and have learning. Do not just leave your kids in front of television, and consume most of their time watching movies. Media has a tremendous source of unnecessary things that might be dangerous to your kids.Educate the kids. It's more fun learning, visualizing and analizing things.

Let Them Pray

Prayer is still the most powerful tool for any kind of fear. Teach your little ones how to pray. Let them know all about Jesus and you'll be surprised how they react once you mentioned the name. Let them pray alone.

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© 2013 agapsikap


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    • barbat79 profile image

      B A Tobin 

      5 years ago from Connnecticut

      Always my pleasure...I will be reading more and more :)

    • agapsikap profile imageAUTHOR


      5 years ago from Philippines

      Thank you barbat79 for reading and commenting.

    • barbat79 profile image

      B A Tobin 

      5 years ago from Connnecticut

      What a wonderful hub! I can recall dealing with my children and this is such a useful article for parents! Thumbs up! Thank you for your writing!

    • agapsikap profile imageAUTHOR


      5 years ago from Philippines

      Dear Martie, it is so true, grown -ups has a lot more issues of fears. Kids are lucky enough to face that fears of a child and overcome it later rather than struggle facing the fear of an adult. It is just the total ability of one person to determine how he can outgrow that fear and dive-in for a more purposeful recovery. However, it still vary from which circumstance a person belong to. Oh, Sorry that it took me so long to answer back on your comment. Nevertheless, thank you for always being there visiting me and never tired of giving me a ' thought-provoking' comments, too.

    • MartieCoetser profile image

      Martie Coetser 

      5 years ago from South Africa

      Excellent explanation and advice about the fears of children.

      Studying (and supporting) my grandchildren and their first encounters with fear makes me understand myself and others so much better. In the past I was too busy to survive and to teach my children how to survive to ponder over the primary causes of fear.

      When my granddaughter of 9 recently learned for the first time the terrifying consequences of saying something - even the merest - behind another one's back - i.e. of being accused of doing something you haven't actually done or meant and of experiencing the rejection of a close friend - her emotional pain (cries and sobs) almost broke my heart. She was totally devastated. And actually she was not that wrong, but her friend was unreasonable and too bitchy for words.

      And so we all also obtain the fear of doing the wrong thing...

      Just pondering the fact that everything we do is rooted in fear. Fear of poverty, fear of rejection, fear of lost, fear of dying....

      Very thought-provoking and inspiring hub! Thank you agapsikap :)

    • agapsikap profile imageAUTHOR


      5 years ago from Philippines

      Thank you so much DDE! A person whose words are so real can uplift someone's spirit. Thanks for commenting and for the vote.

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 

      5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      A well advised hub in Helping kids to Overcome Their Fears, you have mentioned helpful points here voted up!

    • agapsikap profile imageAUTHOR


      5 years ago from Philippines

      Thank you midget38 for reading. I'm glad you like it.

    • midget38 profile image

      Michelle Liew 

      5 years ago from Singapore

      Yes, we should never make light of the fears that children have because these can be so real to them. Thanks for sharing!

    • agapsikap profile imageAUTHOR


      5 years ago from Philippines

      Janetwrites, its true and it keeps on rising. Isolation from them is not easy. As if at some point, media manipulates us all. Every weekend we tried to isolate the kids from television, computers, etc., but friends and peers could be another reason why they keep on insisting. I've seen several moms who complaint pertaining to this matter.

    • janetwrites profile image

      Janet Giessl 

      5 years ago from Georgia country

      Thank you for sharing this useful hub. In today's world there are a lot of factors that could trigger fear like the media you mentioned. It's not always easy to prevent children from those bad things.


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