- Family and Parenting»
- Parenting Skills, Styles & Advice
Life of a Teenage mother.
Looking down at my engorged belly under my gold, sequined dress, not exactly how I pictured spending my senior prom. This was it, I thought. This is who I am now. Or is it? Do I have to be a mom? Can't I just pop this thing out of me and give it to a good family? I don't have any money, I don't even live with my family. I live with him and his family. I love him so much, but are we ready for a baby? I looked up as my best friend nudged my arm. "Kegan, come on, let's dance." "Hmm? Oh right." I stood up and glazed over the crowd of mid-pubescent teens to see my boyfriend grabbing a girl's ass. I wasn't surprised, I was just frozen for a moment as I thought, "This will NOT be my life."
His mom picked us up from the dance a couple hours later, her New York accent filling the entire car, competing with the radio. He just sat there on his phone, probably messaging a girl or one of his friends to get weed, but I just sat there. I just sat in the back, staring out of the window dozing off, which I had been doing a lot since I found out I was pregnant. I loved the thought of me being a mom, I really did. I was just scared. I was scared of the reality that maybe I wouldn't be a good mother. I was scared that my family would eventually stop talking to me if I decided to keep the baby. I felt guilty for being happy when the baby would move inside me, or for being excited to have a little human to look up to me no matter what. I hid my feelings of joy because I know my family didn't think this was something to congratulate.
As I slept that night, I woke up to a beeping noise on Mikey's side of the bed. I sat up and saw a new message alert on his cell phone. I looked at him, his mouth open and eyes closed shut, and I thought for a second to take his phone. I couldn't decide what to do because I didn't want to wake him and start a fight. On the other hand, who would be messaging him this late at night? I quickly grabbed the phone and clicked on the new message. It was a text from a girl whose name I didn't recognize. It read: Did you fall asleep baby? I miss you so much. Have you told her yet? I made sure to message you late so she doesn't catch us. Love you!
I laid back down and suddenly started to cry. I didn't want this to be my life. I truly didn't think I was going to keep my baby girl.