Like Mother Like Daughter
Interesting facts about daughters
It is indeed very interesting to find that daughters are similar to their mothers in more ways than one. I have heard about this a lot of times but started to give it a serious thought only recently when my daughter has become quite grown up and I find the same similarities between her and me that I have heard people say as existing between me and my mother.
My daughter was entirely different from me in looks and nature. I used to even be happy (!) that she wasn't as loud (I'm not intentionally noisy but my voice borders on the rougher side and can never be as soft as I have always wanted it to be however hard I tried whereas her voice was sweet) or as excited as me. I am out to enjoy life, like to laugh a lot (except that I had forgotten to laugh those few years I was ruthlessly affected by rheumatoid arthritis) but she was the quiet type who would not want to open up as I did very often. She was more of an introvert whereas I was the other extreme.
I did not give a serious thought to all this because every individual is different and unique in their own ways and we should only learn to respect their traits if they are good or ignore them if they are not so good. Of course when we find our loved ones having an unacceptable nature, we may try talking to them about it and help them change for the better. My daughter's nature was however nowhere near 'unacceptable' so I did not worry about it.
This year my daughter turned sixteen and I see a lot of changes in her. I loved her for what she was and continue to love her for what she is but am struck by the stark similarities between me and her now.
Mama, my friends say I sound like you
I am surprised how a voice as sweet as hers changed suddenly this year as she turned sixteen and is almost similar to mine that her friends who call her on the phone are not able to recognize who has picked up the phone. They get confused for a split second and then of course they realize who it is at the other end of the line.
Years ago there used to be a situation when my mom used to answer phone calls for me from my friends and there have been instances when they have even spoken to my mom thinking it was me on hearing just a 'hello' without stopping to ask who they were talking to. Then my mom would say that she would call me. There would be some laughing over it and that was how it was. Very strange how similar mothers and daughters can be in certain respects.
All of a sudden, my daughter has become an outspoken girl and I am very surprised about it. Of course children keep changing during their adolescent years but I hadn't expected such a drastic yet welcome change in her. She was never bolder, more confident and excited than she is now and I am very happy about it.
I am convinced that daughters watch their mothers go through their daily routine even though they are never actually involving themselves in any of the work that the mothers do. For instance, my daughter does not come to the kitchen unless otherwise she badly needs something. She is never there to help mommy in cooking. Of course she makes her own noodles or potato fries when she feels like eating and also when I ask her for help.
But strange is the fact that when she is preparing her own dishes, she is like me when it comes to the way she washes the vegetables or cuts them and cleans the place after her work. I mean the little things, so I infer that they keep observing their mothers all the time even when we think that they are engrossed in something else.
The same with my daughter-in-law
Recently I was visiting my son who has been married for almost a year now and living in the middle east. My daughter-in-law had never done much cooking at home until her wedding but started trying her hand at it only a few months before her wedding just to familiarize herself with the basic things to do when she would be on her own.
When I went visiting them recently, most of her activities around the house followed a pattern that her mother adopted in her own home. I was very much surprised by this. How does this happen? The only reason must be that children are very observant right from their toddler years. Her mother too was surprised by this similarity when I mentioned it to her. In other things also like spending and her attitude towards life she is very similar to her mother.
I am like my mom in everything
In the same way, my daughter is just like me not only in the way she works in the kitchen but in so many other ways too. Very often you can see the elderly people at home mentioning that the little ones are behaving just like their father or mother. But most often, girls take after their mother in most respects with a few exceptions of course. Especially the mother's nature is reflected in the daughter more as her age progresses.
We should understand something very important from this. Mothers should set a very good precedence for their children to follow in their life. If we are snobbish and arrogant it is highly likely that our daughters also turn out that way. On the other hand, if we are gentle and kind, the same qualities are likely to be exhibited by them too.
Sometimes the reverse happens when the child, after a certain age, starts realizing that her mother is not right in many things. I have seen such instances but they are very few. Stray cases I would say. Generally you can see many similarities between the mother and daughter like looks, speech and behavior and even mannerisms.
Another area of similarity would be that if you are good in arts and crafts your daughter is most likely to excel in the art. You cannot force them to learn the craft but you'll find that they develop a natural liking for it when they see their mothers make a beautiful quilt or paint a beautiful picture.
Though we can justify all this by saying that a child gets to spend most of his/her time with the mother, it is strange that only the daughter gets to imitate her mother in many aspects. Of course, the younger generation follows the latest trends and styles in dressing and make up that change with the times, yet in their heart, their mother is always their idol and they mostly behave like them. I emphasize the fact that there are exceptions to this but generally this is the case. Of course I am open to different inputs from you all and would love to hear you express your views on this topic.