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Love that is not expressed somehow, is not love. How do you say I love you.

Updated on December 12, 2013

Siblings share a great love

A held hand is a fine showing of love, especially when it exudes safety and confidence.
A held hand is a fine showing of love, especially when it exudes safety and confidence. | Source

How do you say, I Love You?

Communication of Love. There is a fellow who wrote a book called something like “the five love languages” Dr. Chapman I think. He believes there are five languages of expressing ones’ love for another: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch. I think there are two others of significance. Sacrifice and Prayer.

I think that it is important to do all of them to others. And I think that the intention behind our conduct speaks louder than the acts.

But a cool thing about the above is the use of the word language. Language to me means speaking and speaking to me means communication. And most assuredly we can communicate without words.

Public Displays of Affection

I just read a question about kissing in public. We call that a pda. That is one communication that is more to show the world than your lover. But by showing the world we do tell our lover. Caution, moderation must be used.

Being too effusive or too remote causes anxiety and that is probably not the intention, just clumsy.

The bottom line is that you have to communicate that Love. It is wrong to assume it is communicated. It is right to express it. I suppose the inverse is accurate. No communication would reflect no love. I certainly know that If I do not communicate with those I love then I am not really feeling the love. I avoid eye contact and the phone with those I do not want to interact with, I shut down communication.

Probably the most important communication of Love is prayer. You need to let God know you have Love. (surely God knows but that misses the point completely as with any Love) God is generally a non-verbal communicator. Thank goodness. Can you imagine if God actually broke into our lives and was constantly talking to us. Well I guess the same is true for Dads. Sometimes the greatest communication is “I love you so much, I will stop bugging you”. Well I think I will just keep communicating and understand that if I do not get an answer, my friends and family are just communicating back a different way.

(hey I just realized that another form of communicating Love is through food –My wife loves to feed me, I will never think of what she gives me as just food again)

Let us change some gears here.


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    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Thank you. You remind me of the notion of, being there. No physical act is required no stated purpose need be mentioned. But I am cautious with this because, it is ever possible, that the object of our affection, is not reading it, not all have empathy. So I lean toward the sledge hammer approach just to be sure ;-)

    • Dolores02 profile image


      6 years ago from earth

      I enjoyed reading this hub, Ericdierker. Thank you for writing it. :) You mention that we are able to communicate without words, and from my studies and life experience, I know that is a very important truth. I have read that our thoughts and our emotions are communicated constantly to the whole world, no matter the physical distance that separates us. While I agree with you that we must actively (physically -- through speech, etc.) communicate our love for one another, I also think that even if there is no physical communication, the people we care for will know it, even subconsciously, and they will benefit by it. There are people in my life who I have not spoken to in years, but I know they love me. When I get caught up in relying too much on my physical senses rather than my intuition (which is a receiver of this non-physical communication), God sends me dreams to reinforce the message. In the same sense, if we harbor feelings of resentment or hatred for others, they will inherently know it, without our speaking a word or doing a thing to show it.


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