My Top 10 Favorite Kid Excuses to Avoid Cleaning

As a stay at home mom for almost four years now, I have heard my fair share of excuses from my children. I get it - they don't want to pick up their toys or clean up their own mess. But what they don't understand is that this mom doesn't want to either. Over the years, they have come up with some whoppers of excuses. Some have made me laugh, while others have irritated me right down to the core. I thought I would share some of my all time favorite excuses of how my boys avoid that awful, dreadful moment of cleaning time.

Cleaning and picking up toys happens twice a day in this household - right before their Dad gets home and again right before bedtime. Here is a top 10 list of the most commonly heard excuses to avoid cleaning in our house. Enjoy!

1.) (Yawn) I'm so tired. I think I need a nap.

I hear this one all the time from my 3 year old. The first couple of times I thought "Hallelujah!" and would let him go lay down for his nap. He might as well just stamped "SUCKER" on my forehead because half the time he never went to sleep. Now when he tries to use this one my response is "As soon as you get finished picking up your toys, by all means feel free to go take a nap!" Motherhood is all about learning from your mistakes and believe me my boys have taught me so many lessons along the way!

2.) But my head (or insert other body part) is hurting!

Another excuse I hear quite often is suddenly a part of their body is in pain. Most often it is their head. I can't help but laugh at this one. They were running around like two wild monkeys but suddenly feel pain when the thought of picking up their own mess comes into play. I often find myself telling them "Well, we might need to call the doctor and get you a shot or a dose of some yucky medicine for your pain." It is quite funny how a mention of a doctor visit cures all sudden symptoms!

3.) It's too heavy for me to carry by myself!

It is amazing to me how toys seem to gain weight after my boys successfully carried them out of their rooms. I often hear things like "Look Mom - I am so strong!" But as soon as I mention cleaning time, they no longer have the muscles to carry them back to the room. Now I have to stand firm on this excuse - if you can drag it in here, you can drag it back!

4.) But Mom - I can't do it ALL by myself!

Now I know every mom or dad around the world has heard this famous kid excuse. I always come back quickly with "But son - you had no problem bringing all these toys in here by yourself!" Of course this comment is always followed with a reminder, if you would only get one toy out at a time - then you wouldn't have a million toys to pick up at cleaning time. Do they ever take my wise and wonderful motherly advice? How I wish they would, but unfortunately no they are as stubborn as their Daddy!

5.) My legs are not working.

Good one son, but that ninja kick you just showed me proves that your legs are working just fine. I am not sure how often this happens at other homes but any mention of cleaning time makes my kids' legs to stop working. It really is a medical mystery that I hope a doctor can soon find a cure for in the future. Again, one mention of a doctor visit usually cures this sympton with a quickness.

6.) Oh my belly is so hungry! I am going to need a snack before I start.

Anytime I mention cleaning, someone is automatically hungry. I must admit - a fine and clever strategy of procrastination - thought up by my children. Does this strategy work with ol' Mom? Absolutely not. I am still not sure why they even try to use this excuse. Snacks and other rewards are only given after the task is fully completed around here.

7.) But I didn't get that out! (Pointing at brother) He did it!

Oh yes, another great excuse quite often heard in this household. The ol' blame game is played daily around here. Instead of trying to find out exactly who got the toy out, I save myself a lot of time by saying "I don't care who got it out. Just pick it up." Now this may seem unfair to the nonguilty child, but I have no doubt that the victim will get his revenge at the next cleaning session.

8.) (Scratching head) I don't know where it goes.

If I had a box of academy awards to give out, my children would get one daily with this excuse. They really think I will fall for their "I suddenly forgot where my toys go" routine. With a room full of cubbies and organizer bins, they know exactly where every toy goes. This sudden case of amnesia is quite the epidemic around here during cleaning time.

9.) But Mom my cartoons are on!

Good try with that excuse. Thanks to the 10 different cartoon channels now on television - your cartoons are always on 24 hours a day. Chances are my boys have seen that certain episode at least 20 times before, but any mention of cleaning time, and it becomes the most important and favorite cartoon ever! Often times, the television has to be turned off to ensure a prompt pick up of the toys.

10.) I'll give you a million zillion dollars if you do it!

Wow! If I had a million zillion dollars for every time I heard this excuse, I would have an estimated 156 million zillion dollars in the bank. It sounds really tempting but I am pretty sure that change in your piggy bank won't cover what you owe me for my cleaning services. Again, nice try but this Mom won't be falling for that one!

Listing my top 10 favorite kid excuses to avoid cleaning makes me wonder what clever excuses my kids will come up with next time. Will aliens invade their room or will the blame be put on that mischievous elf on the shelf? Will it be another mysterious illness or sudden painful symptom? There is really no telling with these two boys. But I am sure within no time, a new batch of excuses will surely come out in hopes of avoiding the awful and dreadful cleaning time!

Do your kids have a favorite excuse they use to avoid cleaning? How do you respond? I would love to hear your answers in the comment section below!