New Drug Teens Abusing
We all know that emotionally troubled teens will do whatever it takes to achieve an altered state. If you are a dysfunctional parent, your child IS doing drugs. Here is the who, what, where, when, why, and how.
Disclaimer. As you can see from my comments and other articles, if you are too straight-laced to appreciate a healthy dose of satire, the following may include what appears to be an unseemly casual attitude.
Teens all across the great wide world are hittin' spliffs, smookin' doobies, and even putting alcohol into their eyeballs. Sounds freaking nuts, but the latest craze in America is called "Catching Z’s." Teens are taking the over-the-counter sleep aid Zzzquil to get high “legally,” and many believe that because it is legal, it is not dangerous. Users and abusers are mostly young boys, but the demographic is quickly spreading to the daughters of our wonderful nation. Check your kids' rooms and backpacks for the little purple pills before it's too late!
Adults are also being seen abusing this. Some adults think it's fun. Some adults use it to pregame a night out at the club to dance the night away before going home with strangers they just met whose names they’ll never know (and vice versa). Some adults then take it again just before their walk of shame back home.
Teens Do Drugs
Zzzquil is an over-the-counter sleep aid that is basically just an allergy medicine. The active ingredient is an antihistamine, and it pretty much just puts you to sleep. However, if you fight the sleep off, you end up in a dizzy, disoriented state. Zzzquil comes as a purple pill or in liquid form for those teens who are also boozers that like to chug liquids like their step fathers who won't give them the time of day let alone a pat on the back or a "good job" every now and then. I fixed the mailbox you hit when you came home last Friday night, you drunkard, the least you could do is say thanks!
Theoretically teens looking to abuse an antihistamine could just take Claritin or any other over-the-counter allergy medicine, but popping those wouldn't let you use such a cool phrase as "Catching Z’s.” As in:
Hey man, want to go catch some z’s?
Jill and Cindy were catching z's today in Math class. It was hilarious.
Steve was catching z's so hard on Friday that he took a razor blade to his own eyeball just to see how the inside of it looks.
I caught a few z's today, and I realized that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there is no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves.
Seriously though this stuff is worse than budder.
You would think kids would be taking this during the night so they could sleep, but that's far from the reality. What's actually going on is that these teens are taking the drug during the day and fighting the sleep to hallucinate or "trip balls.” Some of them even take it before or during school, at sporting events, and in your own home! Your teenager will probably be tripping out on this stuff at the dinner table tonight. You don't eat dinner with your kids every night? Well, that's obviously why they're using Zzzquil in the first place. PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR CHILDREN.
The biggest problem with Zzzquil is that it's over-the-counter and perfectly legal. Just like cold medicine, kids can pick this up at their local grocery store any day and get high immediately. CVS, Walgreens, or any other pharmacy-type convenient store probably has it.
The best thing you can do is prevent your teens from going anywhere because this is so easy to get, you can't really fight it. They have it, their friends have it, the majority of the American people have it. There's nothing you can do to fight it except homeschool your kids and not allow them to ever leave the house. Maybe become Amish? I don't know.
The universal question is "Why?" The answer is: because they're stupid. Kids and teens crave attention and acceptance and will do anything. You remember high school. You slept with everything that glanced at you. Why did you do that? Because your mom was never seen without a bottle of wine and your father worked so much he was never there. And now you are projecting that on to your children who are becoming failures. They're taking drugs and fornicating with each other while on drugs, making babies left and right. Are you going to pay for those babies? They're everywhere, children are crawling out of the walls like cockroaches. They're all over my keyboard and computer screen oh wait I forgot I took 6 Zzzquil before writing this (for research purposes_
Are you serious? They put it in their freaking mouths. I guess it's not that strange of a question. We know kids have done stupider things, like pour alcohol into their eyeballs to get drunk. That doesn't work, I’ve tried it. Smoking nutmeg? They do that, too. But this is pretty ridiculous. Catching Z's? You can't make this stuff up. There's the liquid they can drink and the pills they can swallow or shove up their butts. Usually, they take three times the effective dosage. That's enough to make you see dancing pink elephants for 12 hours.
It works because antihistamines do crazy things to our brains. So when you take it, if you take enough and then fight through the sleep, you start seeing funny things. It's pretty nuts. You also could get an upset stomach, and regular antihistamine use has been linked to memory loss, but with smart phones and tablets, do we really need memory? I put everything I need to know into my phone and set a timer. Robots run my life!
Pretty soon these dumb kids will be putting it into their waka flakka vapes.
Question Of The Day
Are Your Teenagers Catching Z's?
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