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Parenting Troubled Boys

Updated on May 29, 2010

One of the most testing times for the parents as well as the teenagers is the teenage years. Approaching teenage years make the boys go through a lot of changes physically as well as emotionally. Most of the times parents keep grumbling about their child's changed attitude, without thinking that blaming them is not a solution. Parents have an uphill task in helping troubled boys in overcoming their numerous problems. 

First of all parents should question themselves as to how much time do they actually spend with their teens. Parenting these teens is an effort that parents have to make on their own. Parents should always remember their teenage years and then appropriately handle these troubled boys pressures and problems. Boys normally do not show their feelings. Therefore one needs to know how to tackle the worries faced by them.

Progressive and open attitude of parents is very important during this crucial development period of their teen's life.

Some common problems faced by teenage boys- 

Peer pressure - Teenage boys normally face identity crisis in a group, leading to worry and unrest. They feel out of place in their high school group. They are unable to handle this peer pressure with a worry of being accepted by the peers. 

Unpopular and unattractive - Popularity is a major issue in young teens. Being accepted by and looking attractive to the opposite sex is the most important thing for these teenagers. Lack of this leads them to feel troubled. 

Grades worry - A teenager is always under pressure to excel in his subjects. But if the grades don't reflect accordingly to their parents' wishes as well as their own, it leads to depression. 

Drugs, drinking and smoking - Troubled boys often tend to try drugs and smoking when depressed and also are pressurized to go for them if compelled by friends. 

Some tips for parenting troubled boys 

  • Love and understanding - During their growing times the teens require a lot of love and care. Appreciation shown by parents even for insignificant issues goes a long way in placing trust in each other. This will also help in building a friendly relationship between the parents and their teens.
  • Positive approach - A positive approach is always helpful in instilling confidence in the teens. Parents should be genuinely concerned and not become hyper when these troubled boys land in problem. They should be gently explained how to avoid problems in future.
  • Healthy environment - Unhealthy environment during raising the children hampers them in the long run. Teenage boys feel insecure when parents have differences among themselves. This bickering should be avoided and parents need to be honest about their feelings to their boys.
  • Role model - During their growing years troubled boys face a lot of problems. Here parents should set a good example .When parents are the role models their teenagers look up to them and copy them. This helps in reducing the insecurity feeling and lack of confidence.
  • Strong communication - Parents should always discuss with their teens and make them to talk. They should be made to feel comfortable and secure while confiding in their parents. Parents should not nag and should be calm in treating the troubled boys in a mature way. Strong communication helps clearing all doubts of the teenagers and then they have a positive attitude towards life. Parents should educate them about puberty and changes in their body due to it. Always discuss their problems openly.

Parenting troubled boys requires more than just time. Parents have to be their friends, philosopher and guide. This can be done when parents help the teenagers to overcome their emotional problems and make them feel comfortable with themselves. This will lead into a beautiful relationship to cherish between parents and teens.


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