- Family and Parenting
People Should Cage their Children
It’s has to do with what the parents didn’t do
It is also not going to solve the problem now is it?
Here is yet another remark that appeared in a person’s Facebook status line. It resulted in an ongoing discussion related to experiences that the comment posters had with mostly other people’s children that were showing various degrees of uncontrolled and undesirable behaviour in the presence of the writers.
Needless to say, caging the children won’t solve the problem but it would keep the children isolated from all the other people that would appreciate the peace and quiet that would enrich their daily lives, in their opinion. No doubt, the parents of the obnoxious child would never actually initiate such treatment since the parents wouldn’t know how to do deal with the uncontrolled screaming and yelling that would certainly take place on all sides.
The answer isn’t in confining the child from social contact; it is about the parent doing their job properly. When one takes part in the multitude of processes of rearing a child, they have embarked on a very important journey in the development of that little tyke. If you aren’t prepared to take the necessary steps to do what is necessary to raise a child effectively, well then don’t have one in the first place. One of the posters suggested that “lady, you should cross your legs”. It involves the father too, of course.
Sending the bad-behaving child outside to play, to their room, giving them a time out, etc. is not the answer. It involves talking to your child, educating, reasoning, loving, disciplining, punishing, rewarding, etc. etc. It means that you teach them valuable life lessons like respect, how to act in public, values, and one earns things for effort, one gets punished for bad behaviour, etc. When a parent buys them the latest toy to get them off their back, it only results in the bad-behaving child repeating the behaviour that got them the toy in the first place. That’s how they learn! They put 2 and 2 together and figure out that bad behaviour gets them a reward. So it seems the parent screwed up royally here despite their good intentions.
We all need education when it comes to doing any worthwhile undertaking better. Raising a child is no different. The answer lies in copying the techniques of other successful parents and is not likely to be found in the clinical writings of all the experts that mostly don’t have children of their own. So your grandparents, parents, relatives, neighbours and coworkers would serve as a good sounding board for how to raise your child effectively.
In my day, my mom would go next door to a neighbour’s house to have coffee with a number of the other mothers on the block. No doubt they talked about their children during these social get-togethers and learned from each other. Sadly, this doesn’t happen too much today since the moms are often out working to ensure that ends get met.
We need to find a way to talk across the picket fence again. We need to share our experiences in what works and what doesn’t. We don’t need to chase the next Bimmer. We need to re-examine what is important for enriching our lives. Maybe we need to teach our children well and realize that this is something worth chasing.
I know if I were that little guy in the photo and did that in public, I wouldn’t be able to sit for a week and rightly so. It would have never happened though because my mom taught me better manners since I would be appropriately punished if I didn’t show proper respect. He isn’t at fault though; his parents let him get away with this more than once, no doubt. They all are in need of some help don’t you think? If it isn’t caught now what kind of adult will this little guy become? I certainly wouldn’t want to be his friend.