- Family and Parenting
The Effects of Poor Parenting On Children And Society
One of the main reasons children may act out is there is no connection or bonding time with their parents. This is a necessary emotional component for any human being. We are living beings who need nurturing, love and interaction without this it leaves us feeling empty. When a child is feeling as such, they look for ways to fill this void. Many times children will act out just to get the necessary attention that they are deprived at home. In the classroom, I had seen many students who would use poor behavior to get attention. Now one-reason parents may be doing this is when they were growing up as children themselves they did not receive the necessary emotional bond with their parents. Do not give up though even if you did not have the proper nurturing that you were entitled this skill can be taught to you through therapy and reading books on parenting skills. One such great book is written by Laura Ramirez called Keepers of The Children Native American Wisdom and Parenting. This book goes into detail on giving tips and success on improving your parenting skills. Check, it out I have included the link below.
Another reason your child might be acting out is you are just too busy with a career and the daily chores of attending to a home. While you may not realize it putting a child in front of a computer or television unattended does not meet the attention needs of the child. The other concern according to experts with unsupervised activity on the television or the computer is that a majority of programs run questionable content, which children should not be seeing. Right here in Philadelphia there was an incident several months ago about a group of teens who initiated a fight with someone that started over Facebook. While Facebook is great for communicating and games no child or teenager for that matter should be left unattended on there as, you need to be vigilant in monitoring what they are viewing. Sadly, in the case of these teenagers, the incident went to such a level of aggression that they went out in their car looking for the boy to fight with and his father a hardened criminal met them. All four were shot and two were killed. This all could have been avoided if there was parental supervision. The other question that Mayor Nutter raised was why were these kids out roaming the streets of Philadelphia at 10:30 PM on a school night? It all comes back to a lack of parental supervision.
Great Parenting Tip Books
The Effects Of Bad Parenting
Unfortunately, with this downward spiral in lack of morals and proper upbringing children are committing crimes at much younger ages than in the past. Again here in Philadelphia, we had a serious problem going on over the summer months with mobs of teenagers who traveled in groups of 50 or more where they would randomly pick unsuspecting citizens to attack and wreak havoc.
In the state of Georgia in Aiken and Columbia counties children as young as 10 years old have been involved in numerous violent crimes. Four teenagers and one 11 year old were arrested after being involved in a home invasion in Grovertown. All five of the juveniles were from Georgia. The band of young criminals was arrested for holding a 42-year-old woman at gunpoint in November 2011. On October 28, a 15-year-old girl from Evans, Georgia was arrested for plotting to kidnap and kill another student. Her accomplice Christian Reef Adams-Aniis a 17 year old was also arrested for his assistance with this devious act. On Halloween, a 10 year old was arrested for pulling a gun on a woman who threatened to take his candy in Aiken County.
Officials in Georgia feel that a lack of social values and parents not paying attention to their children are the main reasons for these increases in violent behavior amongst our youth. Columbia County Juvenile Court Judge Doug Flanagan says that youth committing these crimes are getting much younger and more violent. Furthermore, Columbia County Sheriff Clay Whittle feels this upsurge in crimes by the youngsters is a lack of parents paying attention to their children as well as a lack of social values. Sheriff Whittle says this lack of values has been 15 years in the making.
So many parents allow their children to run amuck today its startling. I can personally recall one such incident when my friend and I were in the barbershop in the heart of Kensington a rather tough inner city section of Philadelphia. Two boys one about eight or nine years old, the other about six came into the barbershop. They proceeded to run around the shop wreaking havoc and knocking things over. The older brother then started punching his younger sibling in the stomach repeatedly causing him to double over in pain. What makes it worse is the owners said not one word to the misbehaving youth. I must admit I was very close to doing a reprimand to the boys but as a former employee in the schools, I know firsthand how parents do not even like you saying anything to their children. In fact, in one case a few months back someone said something to a parent on a bus for hitting her children. She had called her posse to meet her at the bus stop. When she got off, they met her and proceeded to shoot up the bus.
Parent Bonding Time Is Important
Dad And His Two Little Girls
Reward Your Children With Special Family Trips
In my experience as a former school employee, a vast majority of children have anger issues going on which is quite sad. Children with aggressive behavior issues also known as anger syndrome often get angry when they do not get what they want. When left untreated by a professional, these behaviors can progress and children can become quite violent. Such behaviors might include breaking things over the smallest of problems and even bullying other children. This is definitely not a good sign for a child's overall mental health.
Yelling is another form of bad behavior in children. This aggressive behavior should not be ignored.
Many of the students that I had dealt with that had anger problems had oppositional defiant behavior syndrome. Children with this syndrome defy anything you ask them to do. This will include refusal to listen to parents and only doing things they want to do. They will also disobey school authorities and break every rule there is and often do not care about consequences. This chronic behavior problem is often more common in boys than girls. According to the latest statistics, it affects about 20% of school age children. These behaviors often start at 8 years old but can start as young as early preschool. Other examples of the syndrome are the child is angry and resentful of others, arguing with adults, loses their temper, and will blame others for their mistakes. If you have a child that displays any of these symptoms, you should take your child to a child psychologist and get them the proper help before it is too late.
Take Your Children To The Playground
Always Monitor Your Children On The Computer
You can do many things along with buying some books on parenting skills. Do not forget Laura Ramirez's book on parenting the link is below for you to purchase. Some things that you can implement right away are avoiding physical punishment as this only teaches children how to act violently. Be a positive role model. You can do this by modeling positive behavior and appropriate ways to behave and handle problems. Remember children that are treated aggressively only learn that behavior. My personal favorite one that I used with my students and one my own sister has used with her children is a behavior contract. Just as a teacher sets up rules and consequences for the classroom, you should have something similar in place at home. List the rules of the home along with consequences and rewards for following your rules. Make your behavior plan age appropriate. For example, you do not want to put your two year old on the computer when you could do some kind of physical activity with them i.e. the playground. . Some great tangible rewards you can give your children are pencils, stickers, and a special toy that does not promote violence. Too often, I see parents buying their children these violent games and that truly sends the wrong message.
Finally show your child a warm supportive assertive parenting style. . Try to steer away from the parenting styles that contribute to aggression in children such as being authoritarian, controlling, harsh or forceful. Follow some of these tips and you will be the stellar parent you were meant to be.
Parents and Children Having Fun Together
If You Were Or Are A Parent Would Try Any Of Tips or Resources Mentioned In This Hub?
Do You Think Most Parents Are Lack When It Comes To Disciplining Their Children?
Kids With Behavior Problems
Do You Feel We Have A Lot Of Children With Behavior Problems In Today's Society?
Laura Ramirez's Book On Parenting
- Parenting Book - What Every Parent Needs to Know
Parenting Book: The Best Parenting Book