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The Effects of Poor Parenting On Children And Society

Updated on March 28, 2012

Poor Parenting

One of the main reasons children may act out is there is no connection or bonding time with their parents. This is a necessary emotional component for any human being. We are living beings who need nurturing, love and interaction without this it leaves us feeling empty. When a child is feeling as such, they look for ways to fill this void. Many times children will act out just to get the necessary attention that they are deprived at home. In the classroom, I had seen many students who would use poor behavior to get attention. Now one-reason parents may be doing this is when they were growing up as children themselves they did not receive the necessary emotional bond with their parents. Do not give up though even if you did not have the proper nurturing that you were entitled this skill can be taught to you through therapy and reading books on parenting skills. One such great book is written by Laura Ramirez called Keepers of The Children Native American Wisdom and Parenting. This book goes into detail on giving tips and success on improving your parenting skills. Check, it out I have included the link below.

Another reason your child might be acting out is you are just too busy with a career and the daily chores of attending to a home. While you may not realize it putting a child in front of a computer or television unattended does not meet the attention needs of the child. The other concern according to experts with unsupervised activity on the television or the computer is that a majority of programs run questionable content, which children should not be seeing. Right here in Philadelphia there was an incident several months ago about a group of teens who initiated a fight with someone that started over Facebook. While Facebook is great for communicating and games no child or teenager for that matter should be left unattended on there as, you need to be vigilant in monitoring what they are viewing. Sadly, in the case of these teenagers, the incident went to such a level of aggression that they went out in their car looking for the boy to fight with and his father a hardened criminal met them. All four were shot and two were killed. This all could have been avoided if there was parental supervision. The other question that Mayor Nutter raised was why were these kids out roaming the streets of Philadelphia at 10:30 PM on a school night? It all comes back to a lack of parental supervision.


The Effects Of Bad Parenting

Unfortunately, with this downward spiral in lack of morals and proper upbringing children are committing crimes at much younger ages than in the past. Again here in Philadelphia, we had a serious problem going on over the summer months with mobs of teenagers who traveled in groups of 50 or more where they would randomly pick unsuspecting citizens to attack and wreak havoc.

In the state of Georgia in Aiken and Columbia counties children as young as 10 years old have been involved in numerous violent crimes. Four teenagers and one 11 year old were arrested after being involved in a home invasion in Grovertown. All five of the juveniles were from Georgia. The band of young criminals was arrested for holding a 42-year-old woman at gunpoint in November 2011. On October 28, a 15-year-old girl from Evans, Georgia was arrested for plotting to kidnap and kill another student. Her accomplice Christian Reef Adams-Aniis a 17 year old was also arrested for his assistance with this devious act. On Halloween, a 10 year old was arrested for pulling a gun on a woman who threatened to take his candy in Aiken County.

Officials in Georgia feel that a lack of social values and parents not paying attention to their children are the main reasons for these increases in violent behavior amongst our youth. Columbia County Juvenile Court Judge Doug Flanagan says that youth committing these crimes are getting much younger and more violent. Furthermore, Columbia County Sheriff Clay Whittle feels this upsurge in crimes by the youngsters is a lack of parents paying attention to their children as well as a lack of social values. Sheriff Whittle says this lack of values has been 15 years in the making.

So many parents allow their children to run amuck today its startling. I can personally recall one such incident when my friend and I were in the barbershop in the heart of Kensington a rather tough inner city section of Philadelphia. Two boys one about eight or nine years old, the other about six came into the barbershop. They proceeded to run around the shop wreaking havoc and knocking things over. The older brother then started punching his younger sibling in the stomach repeatedly causing him to double over in pain. What makes it worse is the owners said not one word to the misbehaving youth. I must admit I was very close to doing a reprimand to the boys but as a former employee in the schools, I know firsthand how parents do not even like you saying anything to their children. In fact, in one case a few months back someone said something to a parent on a bus for hitting her children. She had called her posse to meet her at the bus stop. When she got off, they met her and proceeded to shoot up the bus.


Parent Bonding Time Is Important

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Dad And His Two Little Girls

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Reward Your Children With Special Family Trips

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Anger Problems

In my experience as a former school employee, a vast majority of children have anger issues going on which is quite sad. Children with aggressive behavior issues also known as anger syndrome often get angry when they do not get what they want. When left untreated by a professional, these behaviors can progress and children can become quite violent. Such behaviors might include breaking things over the smallest of problems and even bullying other children. This is definitely not a good sign for a child's overall mental health.

Yelling is another form of bad behavior in children. This aggressive behavior should not be ignored.

Many of the students that I had dealt with that had anger problems had oppositional defiant behavior syndrome. Children with this syndrome defy anything you ask them to do. This will include refusal to listen to parents and only doing things they want to do. They will also disobey school authorities and break every rule there is and often do not care about consequences. This chronic behavior problem is often more common in boys than girls. According to the latest statistics, it affects about 20% of school age children. These behaviors often start at 8 years old but can start as young as early preschool. Other examples of the syndrome are the child is angry and resentful of others, arguing with adults, loses their temper, and will blame others for their mistakes. If you have a child that displays any of these symptoms, you should take your child to a child psychologist and get them the proper help before it is too late.


Take Your Children To The Playground

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Always Monitor Your Children On The Computer

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Parenting Tips

You can do many things along with buying some books on parenting skills. Do not forget Laura Ramirez's book on parenting the link is below for you to purchase. Some things that you can implement right away are avoiding physical punishment as this only teaches children how to act violently. Be a positive role model. You can do this by modeling positive behavior and appropriate ways to behave and handle problems. Remember children that are treated aggressively only learn that behavior. My personal favorite one that I used with my students and one my own sister has used with her children is a behavior contract. Just as a teacher sets up rules and consequences for the classroom, you should have something similar in place at home. List the rules of the home along with consequences and rewards for following your rules. Make your behavior plan age appropriate. For example, you do not want to put your two year old on the computer when you could do some kind of physical activity with them i.e. the playground. . Some great tangible rewards you can give your children are pencils, stickers, and a special toy that does not promote violence. Too often, I see parents buying their children these violent games and that truly sends the wrong message.

Finally show your child a warm supportive assertive parenting style. . Try to steer away from the parenting styles that contribute to aggression in children such as being authoritarian, controlling, harsh or forceful. Follow some of these tips and you will be the stellar parent you were meant to be.


Parents and Children Having Fun Together

Parenting Tips

If You Were Or Are A Parent Would Try Any Of Tips or Resources Mentioned In This Hub?

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Parental Discipline

Do You Think Most Parents Are Lack When It Comes To Disciplining Their Children?

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Kids With Behavior Problems

Do You Feel We Have A Lot Of Children With Behavior Problems In Today's Society?

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    • Olde Cashmere profile image

      Olde Cashmere 5 years ago from Michigan, United States

      Extremely well thought out and written hub, William. This is a major concern of mine for our future is dependent on the kids of today. Parents everywhere can walk away from this article with plenty of helpful tips and knowledge for this issue. Great job, voted up and interesting.

    • William Gerace profile image
      Author

      William Gerace 5 years ago from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

      Hey Cashmere thanks again. I know it is very important to keep our parents informed of what is going on with children today. As an educator I saw a lot of these issues firsthand. Thanks again and have a great night.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image

      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi William. This hub should win all sorts of accolades. If more parents took the time to "parent," we would certainly have less problems in this nation. Great tips!

    • William Gerace profile image
      Author

      William Gerace 5 years ago from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

      Thank you so much Dexter. I couldn't agree with you more. There is a big problem with this today. After being in the schools for twenty years and just seeing the children in my own neighborhood it's clear that this is a valid concern. That being said I hope this Hub does help some folks. Thanks again for reading and the comment. Have a great day.

    • mary615 profile image

      Mary Hyatt 5 years ago from Florida

      This has been a big concern for me as a parent, grandparent, and greatgrandparent. We have allowed children to go without disipline far too long. This is an excellent Hub on the subject. I voted it UP, etc.etc.

    • William Gerace profile image
      Author

      William Gerace 5 years ago from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

      Thank you Mary. I totally agree with you. There is a big problem with the kids today and behavior. I see kids running around causing havoc they're not supervised and it just makes for a bad situation you know. Thanks as Mary for your lovely comment and reading. Have a nice day.

    • bethperry profile image

      Beth Perry 5 years ago from Tennesee

      Hi William,

      I found your Hub very useful and am voting up. I agree that we ive in a time when parents too easily leave the parenting to everyone but themselves.

      I have to say, though, I think society has had it drilled into our heads we can't do for our families without conforming to the advice of the so-called "experts" whose bread and butter depend on sales of books and television audiences. And taken too far this is just another form of parental neglect.

    • William Gerace profile image
      Author

      William Gerace 5 years ago from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

      Thank you so much Beth for reading. I appreciate your comments they are quite valid. Thanks again and have a terrific day.

    • andromida profile image

      syras mamun 5 years ago

      What I feel is that everyone should take a course on parenting or read some hubs like this before parenting.I have seen many parents interacting inappropriately with their kids.I have seen kids complaining that their parents even do not keep the promise they make with their children.I am going to tweet this hub to my friends.Thank you so much.

    • William Gerace profile image
      Author

      William Gerace 5 years ago from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

      Andromedia

      Thanks so much for the fantastic comment. As a former educator I have seen this so many times it is disheartening. Thanks again and have a nice day.

    • James A Watkins profile image

      James A Watkins 4 years ago from Chicago

      Thank you for publishing this illuminating article. When the Supreme Court decided in 1963 to kick God out of the public schools it was deemed as a necessary action to make schools "neutral." But of course we know this was not the intent of those involved nor the result. It made schools favorable to the Secular Humanism favored by the Father of Modern American Education, John Dewey, but hostile to its opposite view: the Christianity upon which this nation was founded.

      We now reap the children of this spiritual sowing. Human beings are spirits inhabiting bodies and when we deny this to the young with the authority of a government school they are lost.

    • William Gerace profile image
      Author

      William Gerace 4 years ago from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

      I couldn't agree with you more James. Taking the religion out of schools was the beginning of the end in my opinion. Thanks for reading. Have a great day.

    • LifeisLovely profile image

      Megan 4 years ago from Clearwater, Florida

      This is written very well. I appreciate all the information. As a young mom I always worry about the way I am raising my child. I know from personal experience what it feels like to not have an active parent. So I make sure I don't make my child feel that way. Thank you for some words of wisdom.

    • William Gerace profile image
      Author

      William Gerace 4 years ago from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

      Thank you so much Life. I'm glad you enjoyed the Hub. I'm sure you are terrific parent. I just like to make folks aware of the pitfalls that are out there today. We live in a really tough world today and there are so many challenges that can lead any one of us astray. Thanks again for the great feedback and have a fantastic day.

      Bill.

    • tbsingh profile image

      tbsingh 4 years ago from INDIA

      well written.

    • profile image

      Breana S. 2 years ago

      This article was very insightful and correlated nicely with a paper I am currently writing. All the examples you provided of increased violence makes it clear that something is going wrong in parenting. Sadly, I don't believe enough parents are noticing the great impact they have on their children and are therefore continuing to add to this negative cycle. I don't think any real change will come unless more of the consequences are put on parents, leading them to change their styles of parenting.

    • profile image

      Roger Fannon 17 months ago

      does anyone know where I can get a book titled Death of Parenting?

    • Anita Hasch profile image

      Anita Hasch 7 weeks ago from Port Elizabeth

      Very interesting hub. Children need to be taught to respect others as well as behaving in an appropriate manner at all times. They should be taught this from an early age.

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