ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

The Joys of having teenagers

Updated on December 2, 2016

The Joys of motherhood

Don't get me wrong, I truly love my children but at times they seem like aliens to me. Their language is like none that I have ever heard before. I am constantly reminding them that my name is not Bro or Dude. Their clothing should be outlawed. Nothing matches which I recently found out that in their circles this is completely acceptable. Let's not forget trying to have a conversation with them. First, you have to convince them that they could hear you much better if they removed the ear buds. I usually start by reminding them that the ear buds are not permanently attached to their heads. These are barriers but they can be breached:

1. Find a common ground with your children-This involves stepping away from the old style of parenting. It always opens up conversation when I start rapping along with a song that the teens feel I should not know.

2. Once the lines of communication are open-Keep the conversation going. This may involve turning off some of the parenting filters. Let your child be open. This involves be able to listen without jumping right into action.

3. Give some background-Let you child know that you once were a teenager. My children think I came out 38 years old. My experiences may not match theirs but it gives them some insight.

4. Give them advice without judgment- Do so without telling them what to do but give it with the 'if this was happening to me when I was your age I would'. Not saying that this works for every teen but for most.

Remember that this generation is not our generation. We are now in a more person centered type of generation. Not saying that we let our children run wild but saying that we find better and more generation centered ways of connecting with them.

Maintaining a healthy marriage while raising teens

Be prepared because teens are a little sneakier and more conniving then they used to be. If this issue is not nipped then it could cause a rift in even the most solid marriage. You and your spouse have to present as a team. Not just any team but a united team. Here are some steps on how to do that:

1. Never disagree in front of the teens. They will definitely use this to their advantage. Remember it is you versus them. We are all human and because of this we know that there will be disagreements. Let the teen know that you will need to discuss with the co-parent and that you will get back to them at a later time with a decision that you both agree on.

2. Date nights-This is super important. Often as parents our focus is on our children. We forget that we have to work and maintain our relationship. This being said, date nights are extremely necessary. It can be something that occurs just once a week. As long as you are setting time aside for just you two minus the children. This is not the time to talk about what is going on with the children. This is the time to reminisce or talk about future date plans. Talk about anything that puts the focus on your relationship.

3. Touch base daily- Make sure that you are communicating daily with each other. Often the children eat up our day and by bedtime we are exhausted. We have to make sure that we are talking to each other about our day, our frustrations, the children.

4. Begin the day and end the day with some small gesture of love. It could just be beginning and ending the day with 'I love you' or just leaving small love notes. Doing so leaves little doubt.

The relationship between the parents is first and foremost and very important to the children. This shapes how their future relationships will be.

How many teenager currently live in your home?

See results

Do you find it hard to find alone time for you and your spouse due to the children?

See results

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)