ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

The Parents Guide For Responsible Parenting

Updated on June 19, 2013

IT’S A TOUGH JOB FOR SURE

Make no mistake about it, parenting is a tough gig! No matter how many parenting skills books and articles you read, there will inevitably be a situation as a parent that was not mentioned in all of those guides. You will suddenly feel like the Lone Ranger without Tonto, and you will begin to question whether you are made of the right stuff.

We have all felt that way so relax, take a deep breath, and realize that the bigger picture is much more important than the daily, individual snapshots. Children are shaped and molded by an accumulation of actions on the part of their parents. Sure we may lose our cool and have a bad moment, but for most of us, those are isolated incidences that really have very little consequence.

What we need to concern ourselves with is the bigger picture. We need to lay out a comprehensive plan that teaches our children basic principles and morals that will serve them well for the rest of their lives, and that is our basic job description. It is not the job of the school, and it is not the job of our child’s peers. We signed on for this job and it is our number one priority, or at least it should be.

There are no shortcuts in parenting, and heaven help the parent who is looking for the easier, softer path. Of course it exists, but it also leads to very negative consequences down the road of life.

So what do we do? How do we raise a child to become a productive and highly-functioning member of society?

From one parent to another
From one parent to another | Source

FROM THE OLD DAYS COME THE ANSWERS

Having reached my sixty-fourth year I have gained a certain perspective about life. There is a clarity that was missing in my youth. I now have the ability to step back and look at the past, compare it to the present, and determine what worked and what failed miserably. Today I will draw on the past to take a look at parenting skills that I believe are crucial in raising a child.

We have seen over the past four or five decades a gradual drifting away from parenting techniques that actually worked quite well. This writer actually blames the decade of the 60’s for this slow slide away from what was working. Since the 60’s we have seen more and more permissiveness, and we have seen a complacency overtake this country, a complacency that did not exist in such great numbers fifty years ago. There seems to be a “take the easy way out” movement in the United States, or what could be called the Path of Least-Resistance, and it has infiltrated the institution of parenting.

I propose to you that many of the parenting skills found before the Sixties were quite sound, and parents would be well-advised to take a closer look at them and consider them in the future.

So, what were those parenting skills so long-forgotten? What are these tips for parents that are valuable and valid no matter which decade we are talking about?

MODELING PROPER BEHAVIOR

The old adage “do as I say and not as I do” should be forever banned from the English language. What a bunch of nonsense. Your children will of course do as you do; from their earliest moments they watch you and emulate you and your actions. You are their number one influence during the formative years, and you can bet the farm that they are paying attention to how you live your life.

If you use profane language you can bet they will as well. If you smoke or drink, you are telling them that it is alright to do the same. If you show them the true meaning of compassion they will live that for the rest of their lives, and if you model a healthy loving attitude towards others they will do that as well.

Never underestimate the influence you have on your children. Thus we have the first of the tips for parents: model the behavior you would want your children to model.

ENTITLEMENT IS FOR KINGS AND QUEENS AND NOT FOR CHILDREN

Of course I’m being silly about the king and queen thing, but in no way am I being silly about entitlement for children. We are seeing more and more children today who believe they are entitled to things without having to work for them. What utter nonsense!

Children are entitled to respect as human beings; anything else has to be earned.

Do not give your kids a free pass on this lesson. They need to work for anything that they want, and it is up to you, the parent, to drive this lesson home. Very few things in life are free, and in truth that’s the way it should be. Those things earned are valued much more than those things given. Allow your children to experience the satisfaction of earning their way; it is an experience they will treasure the rest of their lives.

My son has been working since he was sixteen
My son has been working since he was sixteen | Source

WORKING IS A GOOD THING

Slightly related to the last piece of advice is the idea that children need to learn the value of hard work. At an early age give your child chores to do. Reward them for doing their chores and yes, punish them for not doing their chores. This is the real world, folks, and few people are allowed to float through life with everything given to them. The sooner your child learns this reality the better.

Make the chores age-appropriate, and insist that they be done when they are supposed to be done. Most of us work forty or fifty years during our lifetime. It might be a good idea if kids learn how to work at an early age since they are going to be doing it for most of their lives. This is also a valuable lesson in responsibility, as well as a lesson about being a part of a family, and every member of the family working towards a common goal.

Humanity One World:  Making a difference one person at a time
Humanity One World: Making a difference one person at a time | Source

TEACH THEM ABOUT GIVING TO OTHERS

My next piece of advice for parents is to teach your children about social responsibility. Teach them to be giving; teach them to be compassionate of others who are less fortunate. Teach them the true meaning of the word community. Teach them what the words “love one another” truly mean, and make sure you model it yourself.

I am convinced that most bullying would not exist if parents spent a bit more time teaching compassion to their children.

Show them how to do charitable acts of mercy, and I’m not talking about taking two cans of food off of the shelves and driving down to the Food Bank to make a donation. Teach them how to help neighbors; talk to them about how strong communities begin with strong yet caring individuals.

LIMIT THE TIME SPENT WITH ELECTRONIC BABYSITTERS

If the statistics can be believed, the average American child spends multiple hours per day watching television, playing on the computer, and/or playing video games. Toss in the amount of time texting on the cell phone and we have a huge chunk of the day spent becoming more sedentary.

I don’t know any other way to say this….this is unacceptable! Children need to be outside exploring and playing. Children need to be interacting on a face-to-face basis with their peers. Children need to be active physically so they don’t add to the overweight statistics.

In fact, children need to spend time interacting with their families. Whatever happened to family nights? Whatever happened to families eating meals together?

The time that your child spends with electronic gadgetry is time they do not spend with you, and you, the parent, are supposed to be their number one educator about life. It will either be you teaching them about life or it will be Wikipedia. Your choice!

DISCIPLINE AND THEN DISCIPLINE SOME MORE

No, I am not talking about paddling or whipping with a belt, but I am talking about setting boundaries and raising expectations so that your children understand that negative actions have negative consequences.

If a child does something that is unacceptable, or that breaks a household rule, then they need to be punished in an appropriate manner, and that is a non-negotiable point. If that does not happen then your children will have to learn this lesson the hard way, when they are adults, and the consequences are much worse then.

A parent’s job is not to be their child’s best friend. I believe that with every fiber of my being. A parent’s job is to help their child become a highly-functioning, productive and happy human being, and discipline is an important tool in achieving that goal.

BE THE INSTRUMENT OF EDUCATION

The greatest educator in a child’s life is their parent. You, the parent, are the number one source of information. You are the person who can instill a love of learning in your child. You can instill a wonderment about life. You can teach them the importance of learning.

If not you then who will do that? The teachers? Yes, there are some good teachers out there, but have you checked out the state of the educational system of late? Do you want to count on an under-funded system to teach your children all that they need to know?

Perhaps you do want to leave it to the schools. If that is the case then you owe it to your child to be their number one advocate in school. Make sure they are being taught properly. Make sure that they are being encouraged to excel at school.

I have nothing against home-schooling, just as I have nothing against sending your child to a charter school or a public school. Good educations can be had no matter which route you take, but once you have committed on that route then make sure everything is being done to provide your child with the education that they deserve.

DO ALL THINGS WITH LOVE

This last suggestion cannot be overemphasized enough. A great many wrongs can be righted if you show your children love. The strongest force in a child’s life is the love of a parent. You can take away the possessions and the fancy home and the big car and the high-cost private school. You can dress your kid in rags and buy your food with Food Stamps, and none of it will matter if your child knows that they are loved.

Model love in your homes. Show your child what loving behavior looks like. Hug them, speak to them, exhibit healthy emotions for them, and allow them to grow up knowing that love is the most important thing in life. If you do that you will have given them the greatest gift possible.

END OF THE LESSONS FOR TODAY

There is more I could say but I need to go call my son and tell him that I love him. He is 28 years old now, and quite frankly he is the joy of my life. He still hugs me….he still tells me that he loves me….and he knows that as long as I am alive he will always have a safe harbor where he can find love and acceptance.

This lesson is over! Go give your kids a hug and begin the lessons at home.

2013 William D. Holland (aka billybuc)

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • Janine Huldie profile image

      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Great parenting lessons Bill and I do very much agree that so many of these have fallen by the way side nowadays. We try so hard with our girls to instill good vales and behaviors and also agree whole heartedly that this starts with them seeing us do what is right and not what is wrong. That said I think this was a wonderful article, chock value of valuable advice and tips for parents all over. Have of course voted way and shared, too!!

    • LaThing profile image

      LaThing 4 years ago from From a World Within, USA

      Beautiful lesson, and all these lessons are not bound by time! I think 'modeling proper behavior' and 'do all things with love' are two most important steps in raising children. And all of them are excellent pointers. Thanks Billy, for another hub that is not only inspiring, but also educational. Voting up and everything!

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Lizzie, it's always so nice having you stop by. I agree that these lessons are timeless, but there seems to be a movement away from many of them in today's society....and that is a worrisome development my friend.

      Thank you and enjoy your Sunday!

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Janine, there you are again, front and center and first out of the blocks. Thank you and I have no doubt that you and Kevin practice these principles. Have a great Sunday my friend.

    • stephhicks68 profile image

      Stephanie Hicks 4 years ago from Bend, Oregon

      Bill - this is excellent! I read the hub with a slight bit of fear (where will I be found lacking?) but feel that all, in all, I follow each piece of advice.

      I agree especially with requiring your children to do chores and to earn special privileges, modeling good behavior as a parent, and teaching compassion. And yes - the world would indeed be a better place with more responsible parenting!

      Voted up!

    • Radcliff profile image

      Liz Davis 4 years ago from Hudson, FL

      Have you read the book Nurture Shock? I'm reading it right now. Super interesting. One of the points the authors go over is the way that the self-esteem movement has done more harm than good. There's no reward for good work, no difference between strengths and weaknesses, no encouragement to challenge yourself.

      I like how you pointed out the importance of raising kids to be compassionate. We can't really expect kids to respect us and each other when we treat others with contempt and watch shows on TV that promote condescension as entertainment.

      Another great one, Bill!

    • carol7777 profile image

      carol stanley 4 years ago from Arizona

      What you have written is the perfect parent model. I like to do think I did most of these things..and yes there were those slip ups and bad moments. I had it easy raising my boys. We had few problems and they knew nothing was handed to them. Both worked and learned the value of a dollar and not asking for everything they wanted. This should be sent to all parents today as entitlement is a way of life...

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Steph, I'm laughing because while I was writing this I was wondering how I stacked up. LOL Natural reaction of anyone reading this. I see the smiles on your kids' faces in pictures and I have no doubt you are doing a great job parenting.

      Thank you my friend; enjoy your Sunday!

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Liz, thank you for pointing out the self-esteem b.s......we do not live in a La La world; what we want must be earned or it has no value. The playing field is not even for all of us, and the sooner kids realize the harsh realities of life the better. Compassion....OMG, Liz, when will parents realize that it all begins at home? Drives me nuts the way some kids are raised nowadays.

      Now I'm getting pissed. LOL Thanks #2. I love having you visit.

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Carol, it was one of the reasons I retired from teaching. There is no reality in schools today; everyone is entitled to everything without having to work for the rewards, and it is ridiculous. I know you understand this; I'm just ranting again. :) Thank you my friend; enjoy the Arizona sunshine.

    • web923 profile image

      Bill Blackburn 4 years ago from Twentynine Palms, California

      You provide some great guidelines, particularly the last one mentioned! In the end, love never fails! Great Hub!

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Web, thank you, and I agree with you about love....I have never known it to fail. :)

    • shiningirisheyes profile image

      Shining Irish Eyes 4 years ago from Upstate, New York

      I have not been on Hub pages for two days now. I am deeply engrossed in a kick-ass novel titled "The 12/59 Shuttle - from Yesterday to Today". I am on page 215 of chapter 14. I will comment on this hub after I am finished. Just wanted you to know I have been devouring it since I arrived home from work late Friday evening and have not been able to put it down.

      You are an AWESOME writer. I don't want to give anything away but it is truly a mind-trip where you take the reader! It is hard to surprise me but surprise me, you did! at every turn. There isn't a dull page!

      Awesome Bill - Awesome. I feel "Bill" is in order for such a talented story teller!

      Gotta go! Again - I'll comment on this hub when I am done reading the book!

      Love Beckie XO

    • Curiad profile image

      Mark G Weller 4 years ago from Lake Charles, LA.

      This is so true Bill, The line "A parent’s job is not to be their child’s best friend. I believe that with every fiber of my being. A parent’s job is to help their child become a highly-functioning, productive and happy human being, and discipline is an important tool in achieving that goal" is right at the heart of the matter. So many parents these days want to be their kid's best friends, and that is a huge mistake.

      Mark

    • Deborah Brooks profile image

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      Bil.. you are so right being a parent is the hardest job in the world..

      I am so proud of my sons.. they both have families and great jobs and when i go see them they take care of me.. in fact they would love it and fight over me.. I love it. Now I am not going to say it hasn't been hard it has over the years.. but all the discipline and hard work has paid off.. I thank God for that... there are still things in fact a lot of things I wished I would have done different but that's the past.

      Great hub Bill

      sharing

      Debbie

    • tillsontitan profile image

      Mary Craig 4 years ago from New York

      The only people who should give advice on parenting are parents, as you have so aptly proved. Progress doesn't mean changing the way you love and raise your children. Every time I see a kid sitting at the table with his parents, texting, I want to knock the phone out of his hand. Where is his respect for his parents?

      You are always right Bill, good, old fashioned common sense in raising children never goes out of style. You know my motto is "livin and lovin" and this is a perfect place to apply it!

      Voted up, useful, awesome, and interesting.

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Oh Beckie, how sweet of you. I'm so happy that the book got there early and you had the weekend to read it. Thank you for your kind words, and I'm very happy that you are enjoying it.

      But please....it's billy to you and always will be. :)

      love,

      billy

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Mark, I saw that mistake made over and over again when I was teaching, and it just doesn't work. I know you know that; I'm just repeating it for myself. :) Thank you my friend.

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Debbie, the proof, obviously, is in the pudding. They turned out just right, so obviously you did thing correctly. while they were growing. Well done, Mom! Pat yourself on the back.

      Thank you!

      blessings, always

      bill

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Mary, I'm trying to imagine what my dad would have said if I had texted on the phone while eating dinner with him. LOL It would not have been pleasant.

      Thank you as always; livin and lovin....hard to go wrong on that path.

      bill

    • tobusiness profile image

      Jo Alexis-Hagues 4 years ago from Bedfordshire, U.K

      Billy, you are still smoking!!.. I find myself nodding my head in agreement as I read. All true, mostly common sense.

      Children will always learn from their parents; what they learn depends on the parents. Society seem to have taken a wrong turn somewhere along the way, and it will take time to get back on tract, We've had enough from the psychologists, it's time to give common sense a chance. This article is a good place to start. Another brilliant gem.

    • profile image

      Sueswan 4 years ago

      Hi Bill,

      My hat's off to you and my deepest respect to parents like you who take responsibility in parenting their children . Being a parent is so much more than bringing children into this world.

      Voted up and sharing.

      Take care :)

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Jo, I love that....we've had enough from the psychologists. Very true statement my friend.

      Thank you as always, Jo!

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Sue, those are true words. It's a job that lasts a lifetime. :)

      Thank you my friend; you take care, too!

    • aviannovice profile image

      Deb Hirt 4 years ago from Stillwater, OK

      Yes, this was the parenting of yesteryear. For some reason, it became necessary for both parents to work, then the kids got to busy themselves with something. That something was just a substitute and then it took over as the generations multiplied. It would be easier if we could have stay at home moms again. However, with billy's guide to parenting, it sure is a step in the right direction.

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Thanks, Deb, and you hit the nail on the head with your comment. Society had a shift after the Sixties,and we have not recovered from that shift. Hopefully we will see more families in the future where at least one parent stays at home and actually parents their children.

    • girishpuri profile image

      Girish puri 4 years ago from NCR , INDIA

      Bill, this is perfect parent model hub, and only a perfect parent can write such guidelines, thank you so much for writing this jewel, god bless.

    • Mhatter99 profile image

      Martin Kloess 4 years ago from San Francisco

      Thank you for this. Both of my kids are quite successful. I might have shared this already. When Peter was 1, I realized these times will not last forever. So I made the most of family life.

    • midget38 profile image

      Michelle Liew 4 years ago from Singapore

      It is so important to teach children to realize that the importance of boundaries. Sadly, not many people do so or recognize these.

    • Life Iz Beautiful profile image

      Salini 4 years ago from India

      Thanks for the Lovely hub Billy... well I am gonna use some of the suggestions from here...:)

      Voted interesting and useful...

      Have a great day ahead...

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      girishpuri, thank you for your kind words my friend. Hopefully this hub will help others. :)

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Martin, congratulations to you, Sir! A job well-done!

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      I agree Michelle! Sadly it is not done often and we will all pay for it in the end.

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Life Iz Beautiful, thank you so much. If this helps you in any way then I am happy.

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Fuller 4 years ago from Southern Illinois

      This is wonderful Bill. I have a son Jack who calls me every day from Arkansas. We talk about everything. We always have. He is a diabetic so he has his problems, but he knows i am always here for him. We have our differences, ie, gun control. He is an avid hunter and loves the taste of wild meat, which makes me GAG, but we don't own our loved ones, we support them and hope they will remember the good things and instill a giving spirit to his family. After all that's all we can hope for. Birds ' gonna fly..Loved this..Thank you..

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Oh Ruby, what a great sentence....we don't own our loved one, we support them. I love that and I wish more people understood the wisdom in those words. I think you need to write a poem about that. I'm serious!

      Thank you Ruby! Have a great week!

    • btrbell profile image

      Randi Benlulu 4 years ago from Mesa, AZ

      Great hub, Bill! It's filled with practical, realistic advice. You would think it would be a give! Thank you for sharing! Off to to hug the kids and kitties(my furry kids)

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Randi, you would think it was a given, wouldn't you? Sadly there are quite a few parents who might have forgotten a few of these common sense concepts. Have a great hug and thank you!

    • janshares profile image

      Janis Leslie Evans 4 years ago from Washington, DC

      Bravo, bravo, bravo!! I cannot tell you how many parents/families I've seen for counseling who do not sit down together for dinner! What? They get their food and spread out to their corners of the house. This is the norm. I've actually prescribed for them having a family dinner on Sundays at least. Voted up, useful, and awesome, Bill.

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Jan, it is madness. The most important people in our lives and we don't spend time with them??? What sense does that make? I shake my head and wonder who we can be considered an advanced race! :) Thank you Jan; you are a person I would love to meet one day.

    • janshares profile image

      Janis Leslie Evans 4 years ago from Washington, DC

      Ditto :-)

    • grandmapearl profile image

      Connie Smith 4 years ago from Southern Tier New York State

      Billy, this is awesome! I am so glad you wrote this. I hope it goes around the world! I totally agree with all you say. Children need to be taught respect, responsibility and the fact that 'kindness matters'. I don't believe in entitlements or many of the liberal policies that seem to have undermined this country. They had it right in the 50's, and we need to revisit that time. Voted Up across the board and shared.

      Pearl

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Pearl, it goes back to the old saying "if it ain't broke don't fix it. " Our parents did have it right, but somehow we got sidetracked and took a detour as a society. We need to find our way back to the old days in more ways than one. Thank you my friend.

    • acaetnna profile image

      acaetnna 4 years ago from Guildford

      Simply a great read. thank you!!

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Acaetnna, thank you very much!

    • phoenix2327 profile image

      Zulma Burgos-Dudgeon 4 years ago from United Kingdom

      I find it hard to believe that you actually have to tell someone this. I though it was common sense. How did everything turn so bad?

      I'd go and hug my daughter now but she's asleep and will probably swat at me for waking her up.

    • lrc7815 profile image

      Linda Crist 4 years ago from Central Virginia

      Well Dr. Spock, you have written quite a guide to parenting and a worthy one it is. Your attitude (and mne) may seem a bit dated to some but those old-school forms of discipline and attitude worked. You know me, if it ain't broke, I ain't fixing it. I'm right there with you on this one Bill and I think your ideas should be incorporated into a class in our educational system. Fabulous write my friend.

    • pstraubie48 profile image

      Patricia Scott 4 years ago from sunny Florida

      Yes, Bill, nuturing our children is the most important job we will ever do and we do not get do-overs so getting it right is crucial. Back in the day my parents taught me so many things about how life should be lived. And I am thankful now that they did. I am not sure that I was so thankful then, I must admit.

      Parenting means making the hard calls and being unpopular with our kids...they do not need a best friend till they are grown..they need all of the things you have suggested here.

      Great hub as usual...

      Sending you lots of Angels my dear Friend....:) ps

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Phoenix, I find it hard to believe too, but it is true. Somehow common sense fell by the wayside in society.

      Thank you my friend; wise move not waking your daughter up. LOL

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Thanks Kindred! As much as I loved being a teenager during the 60's, I blame that decade and the thoughts that came out of if for the current glut of good parents. Now how do we turn it around?

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      PS, I'm absolutely sure I did not appreciate the lessons my parents taught me....not then. Now, I can't imagine life without those lessons. Live and learn my friend.

      Thank you as always; sending hubs and blessings and always thanks for those angels.

      bill

    • profile image

      Susan 4 years ago from USA

      Amen! I am sooo glad there are people out ther who agrehat being your childs "best friend" and not their parent is a disaster waiting to happen. From my first hand experience, you end up with a dummy, who has no clue about anything in life, who is worse than lazy and is very very immature. They expect everything to be done for them, and have no desire to get off thei duff and do anything for themselves. Thei only life is that of watching moves, playing games and texting, eating in their rooms and becoming out of shape at 18. It's a disgrace that any parent would raise a slug on purpose because its just easier that way. PLEASE!!!

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      speakinmymind, I almost feel sorry for my son. LOL Almost! He had to grow up with me as a single parent; he's twenty-eight now and the lessons I taught him have served him well, but it was not an easy ride for him. :)

    • DemiT profile image

      DemiT 4 years ago from Greece

      Simply beautiful! Your experience has produced this great lesson. As a mum of a 2yr old, I must admit I agree in everything you wrote. I wish more people had these views, so many children can become happy and responsible adults.

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      DedmiT, thank you! It sounds like you will do fine in parenting. I think sometimes people make parenting more complicated than it is. Common sense is usually a pretty good barometer.

    • teaches12345 profile image

      Dianna Mendez 4 years ago

      I always say children only know what parents role model. Your words here are all sound and so helpful for parents. Today's generation holds onto the entitlement attitude and it is one that prevents them from learning how to cope with life's disappointments.

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Dianna, the selfish side of me says I have already raised a child so no sense in being concerned, and yet I am very concerned and I think we all should be. The future does not look bright unless we start raising responsible children to be responsible adults. But then you know that. :)

      Thank you Dianna!

    • Glimmer Twin Fan profile image

      Glimmer Twin Fan 4 years ago

      "Do as I say, not as I do" is one of the most, if not the most hypocritical things I have ever heard. Luckily my parents practiced the things you talk about here. I can only hope that my husband and I are doing the same for our daughter. We make missteps, but I know we must be doing something right when our daughter gets angry with us for telling her something! Pinned, up and awesome.

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      LOL..Glimmer, that is a sure sign. When our children complain about a lesson being taught to them, you can bet that lesson is valuable. Thank you for that great comment.

    • jainismus profile image

      Mahaveer Sanglikar 4 years ago from Pune, India

      Great Hub on parenting, thank you Bill for the useful advice.

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      You are welcome, Jainismus; thank you!

    • Jesmo profile image

      Jesmo 4 years ago

      Thanks for writing this, I whole heartedly agree with every point. Such a simple framework to allow our kids to develop into balanced individuals, full of love and respect. It´s good to be reminded that what we do and how we act influences them and moulds their lives. You´re a wise man.

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Jesmo, I don't know about the wise part, but I have lived six decades and I've learned from my mistakes.....considering that, most of us are wiser after we have aged a bit. Thank you for the second visit; have a wonderful weekend.

    • Jamie Brock profile image

      Jamie Brock 4 years ago from Texas

      Oh, this is SO important! It's so easy to get away from what is important these days. It's all about instant gratification. And at who's expense? Our children...our children's lives and their future. The future of this country! Thank you for sharing this... This is another reason I love the Walton's. If anyone needs to see how to do it, all they have to do is watch an episode of the Walton's. Great hub, Bill and so, so important! This should be a mandatory read for every parent. I agree 100% with everything you pointed out. Now having said that, I'm not perfect... I mess up but I'm going to keep trying. Thank you for sharing :)

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Jamie, I'm always happy to see you visit. This stuff just seems like common sense to me, and yet it is so hard for some parents. Common sense and love will go a long way towards being a good parent and raising well-adjusted kids.

      Thank you my friend; have a great weekend.

    • Pinkchic18 profile image

      Sarah Carlsley 4 years ago from Minnesota

      Awesome hub here! I've been working since I was 16 too, and before that I helped my dad out with carpentry work to learn the ropes. It's a great way to teach responsibility!

    • billybuc profile image
      Author

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Thank you Pinkchic! Obviously I agree with you. :)

    Click to Rate This Article