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How to Beat the Blues of a Husband Being Away During Pregnancy (Or Whenever).

Updated on September 24, 2013

My Master Plan

The moment he told me it was the time of year for drill, I felt my heart sink. I swallowed hard with the realization that I would be alone for two weeks. "No", I thought, "I will not cry. I will be strong". And for the week leading up to his departure, I tried to tame the sad sappy beast I so often fight during pregnancy. While it engulfed my unconscious, I was trying to think of anything and everything else.

I came up with a few fun activities that my husband and I could do before he left to get my mind off things. We went to the beach with our dog, only for him to pee on a passerby. Then we loaded up on quality TV via Netflix, Huluplus, and HBOGO. That went better.

Suddenly arrived the day he was supposed to leave. He went to work that morning, and I was able to gather my thoughts. It was here, so how could I make the best of it? Thrilled, I ran downstairs. I had a plan.

For every day he was gone, I wrote him a note on a slip of paper. I stuck all 14 slips into an envelope, then into his bag. I then wrote him a love letter, and stuck that in his backpack. Suddenly I felt better.

When I drove him to the airport later that day, I instructed him to read the first envelope on the plane. With that, my soldier was gone for the next 14 days.

The first day alone, I went to the grocery store. And then I cried.The same night, he Skyped me. I was eager to find out what he thought of my first letter.

It was hilarious. He was giddy like a child. He loved my letter. It went something like this: "I love you so much....this is my love letter to you. These are your instructions: only one slip a day, and you must skype me afterwards."

For the next 14 days here was the breakdown (Keep in mind, you would write him notes based on your own experiences with your spouse) :

Day 1: I sketched a drawing of an inside joke between us.

Day 2: A little note and a link to a youtube video I thought he'd enjoy.

Day 3: A little note and some puns that I knew he'd enjoy

Day 4: We love . I looked up the word "cereal" because he eats about three bowls a day. I wrote down my favorite definitions

Day 5: I wrote down a link to a website that was solely dedicated to horror stories in his profession. I then wrote down the link to a video of a prank also related to his work.

Day 6: I had him Skype me for his surprise. It was this: He always asks me what the dog and I do when he's not home. So I made a funny video especially for him, posted it, and gave him the link. It was funny to watch his reaction over skype, and he got a kick out of it.

Day 7: I drew him a ninja and asked him if he was learning any valuable skills.

Day 8: He often has trouble working out while away, so I left him some motivating quotes along with hilarious ones about exercise.

Day 9: I drew us as stick figures dancing. I also wrote him a note saying I probably missed him, and wrote a list of fun things to do when he returned.

Day 10: He loves our dog. Day 11 was on a wednesday. I sent him a video of weim dog being bad (HUMPing it's owner for hump day, it was funny), then below I told him to Skype me for a better weim, ours. At this point I had made a video of our dog for him.

Day 11: On fridays, I switch weeks for my pregnancy. I was 20 weeks this day. So i wrote how big the baby was according to the "What to expect when you're expecting" website.

Day 12: I told him I was busy cleaning for his arrival home, and not to bother me.

Day 13: I wrote him a love note!

As you can see, I was mighty occupied with this little shindig I had set up. I was honestly pleased with myself. Making the youtube videos was the best part, I think. It made me put on some make up and have some fun. My husband was really happy that I did that as well. And though 14 days was much too long to us, I knew I could get through it; at least he wasn't deployed.

Two days after he returned home, we found of the gender of our baby...a baby boy!

Good luck to everyone writing your notes and making your videos. Remember to make the videos you'd feel most happy making. This is all an effort to cheer yourself up, and interact with your husband in the process.


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    • Lori P. profile image

      Lori Phillips 

      5 years ago from Southern California USA

      I'm pleased to read how you so productively and creatively made use of the time you and he were separated. I hope this inspires others to look for ways to enrich their lives during lonely times. I used to work on self-improvement from learning new languages to exercising so I would be a better person when he got back.


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