ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Family and Parenting»
  • Parenting Skills, Styles & Advice»
  • Parenting Advice & Tips

To the parent who made me feel like I was just money

Updated on July 22, 2016

To the parent who made me feel like I was just money. I love you. But making me feel like I was just some money that came out of your paycheck really hurts. All I wanted was for you to be there. But it seemed as though, you were annoyed at the fact that you had money coming out of your hard earned paycheck. I know you have a family of your own to support, but that doesn't mean that I'm not your child too.

Growing up, people would ask who you were and why they had never seen you around before or a lot. I would tell them that my parents are divorced and that would be the end of it. I thought it was cool to have two birthdays, two Christmases, etc. but it isn't. Not if two people can't co-parent. It's miserable.

For years I've tried to figure out how to make it easier and not to see what was so clearly in front of me. I wanted you to love me for who I am. I know you tell me you love me and I believe you. But the way you talk about people like me, makes me wonder.

It hurts knowing that you never really got to know me. The real me. Do you know my favorite color? My favorite song? How I'm doing in school? Or the person I'm in love with? All I've ever wanted was a relationship with you.

But I am so proud of you. My younger siblings know who both of their parents are and know they are loved. I'm so proud of you for learning how to be a parent and to be a care taker. Maybe one day we'll be able to have a normal parent/ child relationship. Until then, I hope it makes you happy that no more money is coming out of your paycheck.

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 20 months ago

      You don't say which parent you're referring to mother or father.

      However lets say it's your father: Most divorce men resent their ex-wives and unfortunately view the offspring of that marriage or relationship as being (her). This is especially true if she is constantly pestering him about money or trying to steal his joy with a new mate.

      Can you imagine "hating someone" and yet being forever tied to them?

      Some men feel like if they send their support check or alimony money to their ex they're upholding their end of the bargain.

      While this isn't fair to the child it also becomes more understandable when that child eventually has their own "failed relationships" or marriage. A part of you will not want to have {anything} to do with your ex!

      Once a child becomes an adult and deals with breakups of their own they might be able to forgive their parents and how they handled it.

      Trust me it was never about "you". If your parents had gotten along better after the divorce your life would have been different.

      One of your other hubs mentions that (you) yourself hold grudges. One can only imagine how many divorced couples hold grudges against one another or wish them ill will.

      Ultimately a divorce is a public admission that a "mistake" was made in the "mate selection process" by one or both people in their decision to marry.

    • Jay C OBrien profile image

      Jay C OBrien 22 months ago from Houston, TX USA

      Almost 50% of marriages in the US end in divorce. Divorce hurts children emotionally. It is not the children's fault, but the parents. All the child can do is learn to forgive the parents.

      My mother divorced my father because he was mentally ill. That is easy to understand and forgive. Why was he born mentally ill?

      Lastly, if you ever need to get a divorce, get a good lawyer!

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: "https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr"

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)