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Lets Encourage a Noble Cause - Adoption

Updated on August 24, 2015
Dr Vishal Varia profile image

Dr. Varia is a humble educationist, thinker and contributor in the field of education, parenting and character development.

Adoption - A Noble Cause

Let’s Encourage a Noble Cause – Adoption

Adoption is the legal act of permanently placing a child with parents other than the birth parents. In this process, the parental rights of the birth parents are permanently terminated. The adoptive parents then assume full legal responsibility for the child. The child, in turn, gains the same legal rights as that of a child born to the adoptive parents.

Before continuing the matter on Adoption, lets first talk about Parenting… To be parents of a child is a blissful state for the adults. Parenting provides a very fulfilling experience that cannot be expressed in words or in feelings. Being parent to a child gives one the feeling of being complete human. Male and Female genders may have different experience and emotional state of being a parent. Being a Father to a new born child is a matter of pride and joy. Being a Mother gives a lady a sense of a complete Woman. Being Parents to a new born the couple has sense of being promoted naturally from mere Son and Daughter in Law of the family to being a Father and Mother in the family. It also promotes the elders of the house to be Grand Parents of the Child. Thus parenting is a natural process of promotion that promotes a couple to be father and mother of a child which is in it a fulfilling reward that is beyond comparison to any other rewards in life.

Many alternatives are available for those unfortunate couples who are not able to bear pregnancy in normal cause. Such alternatives include medical treatment for both the partners, IVF, Surrogate Mothers, etc. However, there are a few couples who still do not achieve success in this process and are unable to promote themselves to be biological parents.

For such unfortunate couples there is still one ray of hope to be parents and that is ADOPTION. Adopting a child is a two way process and even more blissful an experience for such couples. By adopting a child not only the couples receive the rewards for being parents but such an unfortunate child also gets parents. Thus giving shelter and intimacy of a father and a mother to such unfortunate child is even more blissful than being just a biological parent.

Adoption is not simple care giving to a child or taking possession of child. It is a legal process and has to be accompanied by authenticated set of formalities and papers. Adoption involves a great deal of paperwork, as well as the assistance of lawyers, social workers, and judges to finalize the process. It is a permanent arrangement, just like a natural parent-child relationship. However, for most families, adoption is ultimately an act of love and the desire to enrich their family and the life of the child who becomes a part of that family.

There are many reasons why people choose to adopt a child. Some adoptive parents choose to adopt a child because they are medically unable to bear children. Some families choose to adopt because they believe they will be saving a child who otherwise would not grow up with the benefits of a loving and supportive family. In this case, adoption is a means of saving the world, one child at a time. Consider the case of Angelina Jolie and Bradd Pitt the famous Hollywood Couple who have adopted 7 children.

Still other adoptive parents choose adoption because they lack an appropriate partner. Single people may choose to adopt a child rather than use a sperm donor or surrogate mother to produce a natural child. It’s relevant to quote Sushmita Sen the popular bollywood actress and former Miss Universe who has adopted a child being a single parent.

Children who are waiting to be adopted arise from several different circumstances. Such circumstances include irresponsible parenthood, economic crises of parents that force them to give away the child for some money or for child’s good, abandoned children due to societal fear of illicit relationship and children getting abandoned due to death of parents in natural calamity. In all the circumstances discussed above, whether from the perspective of the adoptive parent or that of an unfortunate child or that of creating a healthy society, adoption is a very appropriate alternative and a virtuous deed worth committing.

Adoption is both a legal event and a lifelong experience that affects birth parents, adoptee, and adoptive parents. The birth family, the adoptee, and the adoptive family are known as the adoption triad. Adoption benefits everyone in the adoption triad. Adoption can bring a positive ending to a problematic situation and can benefit everyone involved. The advantages of adoption are endless. Whether it’s giving an infertile couple the joy of parenting, helping the birth mother continue her life, or providing a child with countless opportunities in life, the advantages of adoption permeate everyone who is touched by it.

The day the couple chooses adoption, it signifies the end of their struggles with infertility. It signifies that they are ready and will soon become a mom and dad. Adoption benefits the couple because they now have a child to share their lives with, to teach right from wrong, and to carry on their name. The child gives the parents a reason to wake up in the morning and to go to bed at night. Everything truly revolves around the child, and the parents often wonder why they waited so long to choose adoption. For those reasons, the opportunity to experience parenthood is the greatest benefit some couples could ever hope for, which may not have been possible without adoption.

The day the child gets adopted, he/she gets a new life, a new family, love and support of parents and in some cases brother or sister. The child gets a new future with being adopted by capable parents without whom the life would have been meaningless. Apart from the child reaping the benefits of adoption there are other countless benefactors. The family as whole is enriched by a new member that will carry forth their name in next generation. The society at large gets a productive and polished fellow member who otherwise would have been a burden on society. The nation gets a responsible citizen to be proud of.

But there are many issues connected with adoption. Such complications may be technical, legal, financial, or psychological. Taken for granted that technical, legal or financial problems involved in adoption may get some solution apparently let us focus on psychological issues of adoption.

The society at large is still not open with the process of adoption. The adoptive parents and child may face resistance and abuses from the society at large considering the lack of biological bond amongst them. People may not welcome the concept of adoption and may back bite the family or child with ill comments and remarks.

The family suffers much from emotional stress during the process of adoption. The elder generation in the family may resist the concept of adoption merely on the basis of not being their own blood. In such process it is first the duty of the adoptive parents to create a positive and welcoming environment for the child to be adopted.

Can you imagine what catastrophe it creates in the mind of child that is unwelcome after being adopted? It creates many social and emotional disturbances that may develop narrow mindedness in the child which in turn results into development of negative thoughts and antisocial behavior. There are many such psychological issues connected with adoption that is beyond the scope of this discussion. In short, such psychological issues must be forecasted and provisioned and if need required help of family councilors or psychiatrist should be taken.

The decision of adoption must be a matured one. Everyone in the family should support the decision and contribute in the welcoming of the new member without any bias or grudges. The new member must be accepted whole heartedly and with full responsibility as if the child has taken birth in the family. The adopted child should not be realized or uttered of him / her being adopted or it was an act of kindness done to such child. The child should never feel the burden of such act of kindness as it was not only the requirement of the child but also of the family to have a legal heir to bear the family name. So in a way adoption is a two way process where in not only the adopted child or the adoptive parents gains but the family and society as a whole also gains.

The society at large should support such a noble cause of adoption and should have open mindedness with families that go for adoption. It is a moral duty of every being to support the new born of their species. There are cases where animals are found to support the new born babies of heterogeneous species. One such example is of a famous story character MOGLI, the jungle boy who was said to be brought up by Wolves. If such helpless animals can support and show a responsible attitude towards the new born of species different from their own, then it definitely becomes a greater responsibility of the human beings to support their own species’ by way of adoption.

Let us be kind to our own species and develop a better society. Let us not think of Adoption as merely an alternative solution to parenting but as supporting our forthcoming generation with better and responsible citizens. Let us encourage families to go for adoption and spread cheers, smiles and countless opportunities associated with it. Let’s encourage a noble cause – Adoption.

vishal_varia@ymail.com

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