ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

To have a child.. And to not..

Updated on June 23, 2017

I thought the day i got married would be the most important day of my life but i was wrong.. It wasn't.. The day I became a mom was definitely very enriching and life changing experience.. I was in horrible pain during the labor for 24 hrs and i thought i would die that day but when i received my daughter in my arms for the first time.. I totally forgot what I went through. The most cherished and unforgettable moment for any of the women in the world. To feed her,to clean her, to spend sleepless nights with her though i myself was going through a lot of distress, to see her first smile and her first moments brought about 360degree angle change in my life.. My life was now never same again.. To sleep throughout night was the biggest blessing after she turned 3 months. Then i left

for KSA to join my husband.For the first time in my life i had to be responsible. I had to take care of her and the house which i did happily because i was done living with my in laws and their tantrums.

I had troublesome days in my marriage initially. My husband left for his job abroad after 1 months of his leave. I was manipulated by my inlaws which I had no idea of. My husband was totally different from what i expected of a man and his habits and beliefs were alien to me. To be more clear his religious beliefs were different, he was not a foodie, didn't like outings at least with me, watching t. V was his favorite pass time, wasn't emotional and didn't express himself, didn't like tea!,didn't had any hobbies and more over he abused me verbally when ever he could. Now i am totally different from him.. I was romantic (everything is dead now) foodie, loved tea, loved eating out, was talkative expressed my heart blah blah.. In short there was not common between us not even tea! Many times we argued and it reached till the point of divorce.. I was disappointed with this man but divorce? Now i was a mother..

Now that 3 years have passed by things have changed.. Though he is almost the same but i have mended my ways. Now he drinks tea.. And sometimes we do strike a conversation. 90% of the time we talk its about our daughter.. To see her grow each day is most blissful for us. My daughter loves him very much.. Now i laugh on the days i thought about divorce.. My small family is my world and i want us to be together for the rest of our lives. I often think about those couples who are childless.. About women who due to some or the other reasons were not being able to become a mom.. I feel being a mom definitely completes a woman and strengthens marriage. The man loves his wife more when she's the mother of his children and same goes with woman. And they have more to share together like dreams, responsibilities, relationships, hopes etc. But when you're not a parent world doesn't end there. I believe you are in same boat whether or not you are successful, whether you have achieved something or u haven't. Despite being a mom i feel emptiness in me.. I miss my mom and relatives, we were very close. I am living here because my husband doesn't have good job opportunities in our hometown. If a woman doesn't have children there's a lot she can do.. She can take up hobbies, work full-time job without any guilt, travel the world without thinking twice and more.. I know when you have facilities you can do all this as a mother too but it's a lot different when you have kids and when you dont. Moreover she doesn't have to through the labor pain and the difficult days of new mom and a new born.. Mostly 0-3 months.. Even if you have the most supportive family those months are difficult.. And most women in this world after being a mum live their lives for their children.. Every thing they schedule they do according to their child's schedule.. They cannot save now.. In fact are always out of cash.. They are constantly worried about their child's health, education, growth etc.. So am i.. I mean we forget to live for ourselves after being a mom.. And do we have a choice.. Being the emotional gender...

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)