parents getting old
It's been on my mind a lot lately
So even though it's technically Friday right now...It still feels like
thursday. That is because I haven't gone to sleep yet and it's pushing
3AM...Everyone else I know is asleep, but I can't find it in me to do
that right now. I have the day off and I just want to stay awake and
think for a little bit.
I'll probably think about my child hood and I'll think about what it is to grow up...getting old...watching my parents get old....Grey hairs, and wheel chairs...It's kind of a sad thing to see your parents get older. They aren't the people you remember as a little kid...All of a sudden...they just become normal people like you and me...Sure they are still your parents, but they don't seem so parent like once you get to your twenties and live on your own. They could all of a sudden appear to be like every other customer that has gone through your line at work. Their super powers seem to have left them, and now they are normal people like you. They can't solve all of your problems, like when you cut yourself playing on the playground, or when you had a fever and they gave you chicken soup. You take care of that now...
Something happens to a young adult...the parent figure sort of dies and becomes a part of themselves...as young adults get ready to be a parent themselves, the parent figure in the people who raised them tend to vanish, at least to a certain extent, and it gets reborn in themselves. All of the little sayings you heard as a kid, all of the special treatments you received, all of the kinds of discipline, just sort of shows up in your personality. You prepare yourself to replicate how you were treated as a kid whether good or bad the child you are about to have yourself.
So yeah....I don't really know. It's just all a weird feeling. It's definitely not a new feeling to me. I'm 22 now, and I started all of "This" back when I first started college at 18. It's just been on my mind again lately. Don't really know why.
You know...They say children go through a phase as a kid of coming to the realization of death, and that it will happen to their parents one day....I think we go through it at least one more time as young adults, and our older loved ones start getting sick and start to die.