I don't know enough about your situation to offer a solution. Hopefully I can be a quarry for ideas. I have four children as well and my experience has led me to a few conclusions. First, daycare today is much better than it was 10 or 20 years ago. In most cases, I think professional daycares do a better job of fulfilling a child's needs for activity, relationships, and learning than most mothers will do. Second, most women I've known hate (or get bored) staying home and raising children. I don't think women have ever liked doing it. It's ironic, because women are the ones who want to go out and work at a job and men prefer to stay at home. Yet society places the man in the job role for some reason. If you go to work and you find your entire paycheck is going toward daycare, you are still doing ok. Here's why: Option 1) Your children spend time in daycare and learn to read, write, draw, and play with other children and adults in an environment that develops adaptation skills. Meanwhile, you are not bored because you are out working and interacting with other adults. Your family makes no extra money from you working due to the daycare, but maybe that will change someday. The downside is your husband will not be able to focus singularly on his own job as he will have to help out around the house after work. He will feel his quality of life has diminished, while you will feel that yours has increased. Option 2) You bear the brunt of raising your children and keeping the house clean. You are unhappy and your child may get bored too. You don't get paid for all of this work you do, but your husband is able to have a better quality of life. It all depends on how much you will be gone at work and how much money you plan to make.