The wife has leukemia and is getting worse, husband is in denial. Their home has major problems and they don't have the money to fix them. They seem to not take it seriously when we mention their needing to move. They live 2 hours away from the closest relative willing and able to help them. How do you convince aging parents in a gentle way, that they are no longer able to be independent and need to be closer to those who can help them?
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completely understandable. It is such a difficult subject, no one wants to say to them "you're too old and frail to manage" but at the same time, it is a colossal mess in the making. Talk about no easy answers...
I completely agree. I think they need to downsize to an apartment and be closer to us. I think they can manage on their own without the stairs and without reliable help being 2 hours away. Dad is unfortunately not always forward thinking that way.
No offense, you don't know our situation. There are no siblings willing to help just us we are two hours away and she is very ill and too much for him to take on by himself. I'd obviously leave them if it was feasible.
Thank you. I'm thinking maybe not even a facility yet, but even just a ground level apartment at first, maybe a facility later on. Dad is well enough to not need a facility, but not well enough to care for mom who is very ill and worsening.
The nice thing about my parent's place is that is has diff. areas. My folks live in an "independent living" apt.. They have a van and are free to do what they want. There is also med. care on site and assisted living & nursing if or when needed
That does sound nice. There is a similar place close by my aunt was in. My problem is I think dad will take that hard and may resist because despite being independent, he'll still see it as "a home".
Thank you. I understand it's got to be awful to give up ones independence, I think maybe we will try to just show them some places in the area that are nice and at ground level. They live in a split level and it's another accident waiting to happen.