I never knew either of my grandfathers -- I met my maternal grandfather, saw him twice before he died, but never my paternal one. Of my grandmothers, one never played favorites. She treated ALL kids like her grandkids, and whenever we went to visit she had all the neighborhood kids stopping by and calling her "grandma" too. The other grandmother, however, plays favorites BIG TIME. She has no issue playing family members against each other, and seems to make judgments based on her assumptions about people rather than getting to know them. For instance, she has always assumed that I'm like my mother, and that I'm spoiled because I'm the youngest. As such, I've always been the not-favorite. Neither is true in the eyes of the rest of the world, but she's convinced, and I've felt her displeasure since long before I could understand why I was treated differently. She is the only grandparent still alive, but is no longer interested in dealing with the person she thinks I am, and I am no longer interested in her scorn for that imagined person who always stands in front of me when she looks my way. This is where I'm thankful that it is possible for us to redefine "family," allowing us to regard only those who participate in a mutually supporting unit as such.