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Family Life vs. Single Life

Updated on February 12, 2010

Initially, when first thought of, it's obvious that there's a difference between living the single life as opposed to the married/family life. Most people who are single typically are out often, and most weekends, usually gone past midnight hours, going on the latest "mission" (lol!) always up for a drink, and flocking towards most any huge social get together. Most people who are married or living the family life with kids are typically home through the week, looking for babysitters for a night out on the weekend, planning the next family outing, getting to bed early (if they're lucky lol!) and opt for any outing that doesn't involve noise restrictions.

 Though there are those obvious differences, it didn't really hit me until I had a conversation with an old friend. We're both 31, and had met back in the seventh grade. We were pretty close for a few years, then lost touch through high school. We never kept touch at all till we found each other through Facebook.

So we're catching up on basic things and she tells me she's single living up north, no kids, and working full time. I respond by explaining how I'm married now, still living in town, 3 kids, and home full time. Complete exact opposites! This was neither a good or bad thing, just an observance. She seemed pretty happy, and we talked.


Then the question comes up, "So what do you do for fun?" my friend asks. My mind paused for half a second, not because I couldn't answer her question but because I realized that my answer and hers were completely different. I recalled in my mind the nights that just my husband and I spend together away from the kids, late night soaks in the hot tub, family bowling nights, movie nights in with the kids, going on family bike rides, big family get togethers with lots of home cooked food, catching a comedy show with friends, etc. She mentioned earlier of her nights out late at the clubs, or parties, basically hanging around the dating scene. Nights I remember quite well myself! So I proceeded to answer her about what I actually do for fun. By the end of our conversation, I realized we were in two separate worlds. I used to be in her shoes, so I knew that she would never really comprehend my sources of "fun". It's just amazing the difference between the two, when you have the opportunity to be able to compare both sides of living the family life vs. the single life.

It was that conversation that inspired me to really reflect on my life. I loved that my friend was living happily single and enjoying herself. I noted how different our lives were, and again- I don't believe either lifestyle is any better, because I do think that either way whether you're single with or without kids, married, etc. everybody is different and has different wants and needs to cater to. I guess for me this conversation was simply a bit of an eye opener to how my life has really changed.

 I've experienced the whole single scene, so it's interesting to look back and pull up old memories and feelings and comparing them to where I'm at now. I remember the days of living for the weekends! The week was just a countdown for what was really goin on. I do have to admit, my priorities weren't exactly where they should've been at all times. But that for me, was a while back now. Staying up all night was never a problem, in fact most of the times I wouldn't leave the house till 10pm to start off the night. Those were good times for sure!


 I'm still experiencing good times, in ways more fulfilling to me now than before. It's a different kind of enjoyment when you've got your family involved through everything. It definitely has you on your guard for keeping your priorities straight, because more than just yourself to look out for, there's now a whole other unit; my husband and 3 kids. Going out with friends back then all the time, never really knowing what was gonna go down for that night or weekend, were all great times. But I have to say that living the family life now, involves times that are just as good, if not better.

Now, especially being home full time I'm far off from starting my nights out at 10pm. I think most nights I'm about drained and ready to call it a day by 9pm. It's even better when you have someone who shares your life, helping you work towards the same goal. I think the family life I have has made me really stop and appreciate all of the little things. Don't get me wrong, there's plenty of times where I'd love to just step away from all the "madness" of the kids and all, but that's just part of the whole package. Maybe it's me getting older...I mean- wiser! Hahaha! Like I said, something to reflect on and share. To say the very least, who I am, where I'm at, and what I have now, I am deeply grateful!


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