WELCOME TO NIBBLER'S NOSH!
This light-hearted lens is devoted to amusing aphrodisiacs (better known as fanciful foods and boisterous beverages with romantic repercussions).
From ancient times to modern day, Casanovas, Lotharios, and Romeos not to mention more than a few Cleopatras, Queens of Sheba, and Naughty Ladies from Shady Lane have learned that the best way to a lover's libido is through the tummy. (This explains why happy-seeking homo sapiens often end up with a big belly ache after having consumed far too many clams, oysters, and ground rhino horn not to mention chocolate cupcakes for their own good.)
Thank goodness man also invented antacids to eliminate heart-burn, and anti-flatulence pills to quell those wayward winds, both of which are common after an amatory adventure or culinary caper. So get ready for some good mood food!
Image Credit: djmickens' photostream on flickr.com
If you must scratch yourself silly ... - Then at least eat yourself sexy!
Image Credit: Duane Bryers
If you want to know "How to look good naked" (in Canada), you may want to follow international nutruition sensation, Gillian McKeith, in her new TV program appropriately entitled, "Eat Yourself Sexy".
Good-food gurus know that libido-challenged ladies can use a little oomph every now and then, especially when they're trying to juggle three balls in the air, while washing the dishes, clothes and family pets not to mention listening to everybody's tales of woe.
Thirteen women find some helpful hints on how to reclaim their long lost mojo with the aid of some merry morsels of munchies made especially for them!
WHY DON'T YOU GET OUT OF THOSE WET CLOTHES AND INTO A DRY MARTINI? (Image Credit: Joe Alterio@flickr.com)
Is chocolate an ardently amorous April aphrodisiac?
BACON is sex in a skillet. It's the ultimate aphrodesiac for all living things...except pigs, of course.
A TOADILY AWESOME TREAT FOR VALENTINES DAY! (Image Credit: Bill Bayer@flickr.com)
"For those of you who like to scarf your popcorn in the sack, the good news is that Newman's Own contains an aphrodisiac."
(Paul Newman, 1925-2008, American actor)
EROTIC EDIBLES FOR PASSIONATE PALATES
Pray tell what did our ancestors, those curious cave-dwellers, do without delightful diversions such as the drive-in movie theater, the boob tube, or thrilling theme-parks?
Well, it may surprise you to know that apparently they knew how to play in the hollyfuds and probably relied a good deal more on puckish sort of pastoral pastimes than we do.
Here are some fun foods to satisfy your swain!
-- Kidneys (of sheep, pigs, and cattle are best when barbecued on a skewer with a juniper berry energy drink, said to maintain intestinal fortitude and youthful ardour).
-- Lentils (If it was good enough for the "Father of Medicine" Hippocrates, to "keep the older man alert", you can be sure it's good enough for you!)
-- Liver (Frankly my dear, if the Roman poet Horace found it could whet his amorous appetite, perhaps it's time to learn how to cook it!)
-- White Lizard (An excellent amatory appetizer if cooked in sweet olive oil with cloves, cinnamon, giner, cardamom, coriander, white pepper and a touch of honey.)
-- Saffron (If it was good enough for Aristotle and friends not to mention Persian Kings to satisfy their powerful and passionate palates, it's certainly up your alley!)
-- Garlic & Onions (If it was good enough for the legendary Greek epic poet Homer, who ate them raw and loved their pungent aroma, you can bet your sweet bippy that you can handle them!)
-- Truffles (Let's face it, anything that's rare and pricey even if it's mushrooms is bound to stimulate your taste-buds and increase your testosterone level...whoopee!
-- Leeks (The seductive shape should give you hint as to their value as an aphrodisiac not to mention as a popular diuretic and laxative; what more do you want from a vixen veggie?)
She vowed never again to fall for that "KISS ME I'M A PRINCE" line! (Image Credit: mquest email@example.com)
PASSPORTS TO PARADISE
To inflame passion and maintain potency, the human species has resorted throughout history to all manner of romantic remedies, some successful, some daring, and some might say, even a tad outlandish.
When it comes to seduction or lifting one's lagging libido, one has a good many foods, drinks, chemicals, and plants from which to choose.
Although "absinthe" (known as Artemesia Absinthium or wormwood) is the primary ingredient in a popular French liqueur, it is also used to ward off malevolent spirits however, if taken to excess it may also lead to insanity. Apparently, John the Baptist wore a girdle fashioned of wormwood while strolling about in the wilderness -- perhaps to banish the demons or perhaps to pay tribute to the Greek Goddess of love known as Diana or Artemis, the Hellenic goddess of forests, hills, and virginity/fertility.
Frogs and the bones of frogs, were popular among the Romans as a merry-making meal appetizer. So, it's not surprising that today, these "noble aphrodisiacs" are treated as a culinary delicacy, especially by the French, renowned as much for their courtship capabilities as for their culinary capers.
Fanciful foodies wishing to indulge in feelings of euphoria might well be advised to take up amatory cooking. Among the most delightful dishes for amorous encounters include: beef or chicken curry, cheese soup, seductive sea-creatures including carp, cod, crayfish, eels and herring, fresh oysters or oyster stew, milk pudding, omelettes, onion soup, not to mention apple, pear, or pineapple fritters.
For those looking for something quite exotic, there are a number of entertaining edibles and lusty libations one can consume including a boisterous beverage prepared with the testicle of a goat or ram boiled in milk and sugar (recommended by Dioscorides, a first century A.D. Greek physician), goose-tongues (recommended by Roman poet Ovid), and fermented grapes (associated with Dionysus, the inspirer of ritual madness and ecstasy as well as Greco-Roman god of wine, fertility, and procreation.)
HOW TO WOO ME POLL
Well, if you're a finger foody, you might want to serve your special someone the following flights of fancy:
1) Roasted asparagus with fennel and avocado salad (it will tickle you pink);
2) Oyster in the halfshell (Casanova consumed 50 a day for breakfast), or perhaps chili-rubbed chicken breasts in honey sauce (if you prefer Lothario's favorite food);
3) Chocolate ginger parfait with figs, bananas cooked in run served over real vanilla icecrem, or chocolate almond cake (if you have a sweet tooth and sweet disposition).
What is the ultimate aphrodisiac?
"For women the best aphrodisiacs are words. The G-spot is in the ears. He who looks for it below there is wasting his time."
-- Isabel Allende, Chilean-American writer --
FINALLY LOVE POTION #9 COMES IN A BIG BOTTLE! (Image Credit: Chud Tsankov Illustrations)
SEDUCTIVE STIMULANTS WITH STRANGE NAMES
When it comes to seductive stimulants, there is an amazing array of amusing names from which to choose.
Mugwort (Atemesia vulgaris), place the herb inside a pillow and sleeping on it is said to induce vivid dreams of powerful pans and pixies, but it also works well on repelling insects, particularly moths.
Horny Goat Weed (Bishop's Hat, Fairy Wings, or Epimedium) said to be a powerful alternative to the "little blue pill".
Sea-Slug (or sea-cucumber), a stimulating sea creature with an elongated body and leathery skin, is considered an aphrodisiac in Asia.
Rhino Tusk (or Unicorn Horn), throughout the centuries man has been looking for the magical horse with a single horn that would bring him health, wealth and happiness.
Illustration Credit: firstname.lastname@example.org
LOVE POTION #9 RECIPE
For anyone who's been searching for a paramour in all the wrong places, here's the right recipe, "Love Potion #9" (courtesy of the Druids & Damsels-in-Distress Firey Meals Society).
Ingredients for "Titillating Tea":
1 pinch of rosemary
2 teaspoons of black tea
3 pinches thyme
3 pinches nutmeg
3 fresh mint leaves
6 fresh rose petals
6 lemon leaves
3 cups pure spring water
To woo another, brew this tea on a Friday during a waxing moon (moving from new moon to full moon).
Place all ingredients in an earthenware or copper tea kettle.
Boil three cups of pure spring water and add to the kettle. Sweeten with sugar and honey, if desired.
Before drinking, recite this rhyme:
BY LIGHT OF MOON WAXING
I BREW THIS TEA
TO MAKE [lover's name] DESIRE ME.
Photo Insert Credit: Katsimagination@flickr.com
LUSTY LIBATIONS TO LIFT THOSE LAGGING LIBIDOS
MIRTHFUL MEAL MESSAGE FROM A LIGHT-HEARTED LUSH
"My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four, unless there are three other people" (which is probably why Orson Welles who said this thought consuming oodles of gastronomically appealing and lust-provoking anchovies might be a good substitute for tasty dinner companions)!
MUNCHING ON MORSELS IN OTHER LOVELY LANGUAGES
Nibble in Dutch is knagen, knabbelen
Nibble in French is ronger, croquer
Nibble in Italian is rosicchiare
Nibble in Portuguese is mordidela
Nibble in Spanish is mordisco
Nibble in Swedish is knapra, nafsa, mumsa
A Palatable Personality Profile... - A Delightful Date With Destiny?
Image Credit: Vimrod cartoon - myauntthecarnivorousmoose.blogspot.com/4794a.gif
"NAUGHTY GIRL" - For Australian Energizer Bunnies Only!
Take me a turtle-dove
And in an oven let her lie and bake
So dry that you may powder of her make;
Which, being put into a cup of wine,
The wench that drink'st it will to love incline."
Image Credit: Scarlettcat's photostream on flickr.com
HIPPOCRAS APHRODISIAC: Red Burgundy with ginger, cinnamon, cloves, vanilla, and white sugar (Rabelais' Gargantua & Pantagruel)
ENTERTAINING ELIXIRS TO LOVE
For those who can't keep their hands off those alluring artichokes!
Who says g-strings and gastronomy have nothing in common?
The perfect gift for newlyweds (or how marriage and a microwave go hand in hand.)
Written by a Goddess of the Grape, this book is sure to entertain you and whet your appetite!
YOO HOO, SANTA ...C'MON DOWN MY CHIMNEY FOR SOME MILK & COOKIES! (Image Courtesy of Bob Van Ooik Studio)
MISTLETOE MAGIC FOR MATURE MUNCHKINS? (Image Credit: The Gross Uncle @ flickr.com)
The Booty Bistro & Bookstore
Little tidbits that never tasted better!
For those with a keen interest in cultivating culinary delights and connubial bliss.
For food-loving hunks and hussies only!
Have you ever tempted your tastebuds with connubial cuisine?
All you ever wanted to know about aphrodisiacs and never dared to ask?