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Pineapple Pizza: Get over it, haters

Updated on October 5, 2016

A Clever Meme Expressing the Pineapple Party's Disdain

Pineapple Pizza, the History

The traditional "Hawaiian Pizza" was invented (if you can call it that) by a Canadian chef, Sam Ponopoulos. Having never approached pizza before, he was unaware of the social intricacies he was clearly tip-toeing around. Of course, the Hawaiian Pizza became a hit and can be found on pizza menus around the globe, but having never originated from Hawaii and bringing fruit onto the Italian pie, the issue today is a cause of controversy.

A quick Google search can show one the vast majority of people against the fruit's presence on a pizza, many of whom claim that its nature as a fruit is the reason for such debate. But I have one piece of evidence that I feel many of the haters out there are ignoring: Tomatoes are, even if you don't like the idea, a fruit! It's an unavoidable truth, regardless of whether the look, feel, or taste like a fruit, the ARE a fruit. The comprise the sauce, and also a majority of the veggie ingredients that one finds most commonly on a pizza. So what is really bothering pizza fans out there, then?

Pineapple Pizza, the HubPages decision

Should Pineapples be allowed on pizza?

See results

The Fruit and the People

Well for one, I feel it is definitely the refusal to recognize the Tomato as a fruit, but also the unwillingness to branch out and experience the fruit's application as a pizza topping. Have you ever had a Hawaiian Pizza (or perhaps the Canadian Pizza as it should be known)? I have and it's, brace for impact, delicious. I have never been more confused by a demographic of haters, except perhaps by the internet-famous which provides haiku and first-hand accounts of why cilantro ruins every meal (another claim of which I am opposed).

My biggest question to haters out there is this: Why do you care? This one goes out to you as well, cilantro haters, why do you care? Just order or make your food without the herb/fruit and you can avoid an all-out war against its supporters. Certainly, the haiku produced are not only hilarious but undoubtedly only made possible by the group of dissenting opinions, but telling people how to live and eat their own food is something I cannot even begin to fathom.

The Dissenting Opinion

Other, more traditional Pizza lovers claim that the pineapple doesn't belong because of it's effect on pizza composition and result. The fruit itself is extremely moist, and for this reason, it causes the crust and other elements of the pizza to become more water-saturated, and in some cases, soggy.

Another claim is that the fruit itself is too sweet, and that it does not pair well with the traditional pizza elements of Mozzarella cheese, drowning out the subtle flavor of the cheese with the overall sweet and tartness of the pineapple.

Finally, the tradition of having low-cost ingredients on a pizza, ingredients only available to a lower class, is another cause for disagreement. The pineapple itself is a difficult fruit to harvest, and for this reason, it would be difficult to find one on a pizza before the modern era. To long-time pizza lovers, this is enough to despise the novel ingredient.


The People's Opinion

A recent Buzzfeed poll, results pictured above, found that of 80,000 cast votes, the vast majority (64%) found pineapple pizza to be enjoyable. Assuming this demographic can be used as an estimation of the population, that would mean that you pineapple hating pizza traditionalists are not only outnumbered, but are speaking more often and loudly about their own negative views than pineapple lovers are with their positive opinions.

The Author's Opinion

Taking all of this into account, I have only one thing left to say: Get over it. Get over it! Come on, guys, who really cares? I love pineapple pizza, and I love cilantro too, but you don't see me blogging about how bad traditional pizza is or how cilantro should be respected as a universal ingredient. No way! Because I know that people are entitled to their opinions and there isn't always something we can do to change that. So what? We move on. And we enjoy whatever pizza or herbs we like, without having other people tell us what to do.

Today, I ask of you, traditionalist pizza lovers, to put down your arms. We love pizza just as much as you do! So what if we put a little fruit on it, we promise not to put any on your slices. The world could always use a little less hate being spread around, let's start with pizza.


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