25 Extreme, Disgusting and Crazy Sandwich Fillings
Enjoy your sandwich fillings!
What is the most disgusting sandwich filler you've ever eaten? The most extreme? I guess that's an impossible question to answer because we all have our own ideas about what should go between two slices of bread. Be it white, brown, rye, roggebrod or baguette!
I thought my tastes were extreme - I love banana and grated chocolate between wholewheat sliced as an energy food but this pales into insignificance when compared to the following sandwich fillers.
These are taken from various sources - myself, family, friends, students, low renters, those with strong stomachs and other ardent sandwich makers.
They're mostly if not wholly authentic, that is, they've been made and eaten by real human beings.
Be careful though. Some are worth trying, some are enjoyable and nutritious; some definitely to be approached with caution, and a strong stomach.
If the Earl of Sandwich is looking down on us from his parlour in the sky I can only say - thanks for the invention, each day millions swallow your surname!
For those who don't eat meat, vegetarian options can be found at numbers: 2,3,4,5,9,11,14,17,19,21,22,and 24.
1. Breakfast at Sea
The first offering comes on wholemeal bread and is a nutritious mix of protein spiced up with a crunchy accompaniment, adding an edge to an interesting unseasoned lunch time snack.
Fishpaste, gherkin, sausage, pickle and fried egg.
2. Two's Company
Next up on the plate is a student's delight. When you've run out of staple foods and your cupboard is bare, your fridge empty and the freezer a vast white space of nothingness, reach for the last two items available.
French mustard and Apricot preserve.
A thin layer of french mustard on one slice. A thin layer of apricot preserve on the other. Enjoy?
3. Three In A Bed
This third sandwich would grace any vegetarian's lunch box. It has a common base but takes off with the addition of an unusual and peppery plant. So, prepare to have your tongue stuck to the roof of your mouth and your teeth full of little green mashed up bits.
Crunchy peanut butter, alfalfa sprouts, mayonnaise.
4. All Red
Fourth is a low rent affair that smacks of male desperation and quick fix tactics. The saving grace is a little red vegetable. At a push it could be toasted. Check this one out.
Cold baked beans, ketchup, sliced tomatoe.
5. Green Sleeves
At number five comes this delicate yet eye watering masterpiece. Four fascinating ingredients that would put a smile on any vegetarian's face and stare of bewilderment on everyone else's.
Dandelion leaves, endives, sliced radishes, cream cheese, raw onion, mustard.
Boy Sandwiched Between Mum and Sandwich Stealing Dog
A Japanese work of art that when served on a train comes in an oblong container.
Pork cutlet, cheese, tomatoe, onion, lettuce, pickle, Worcestershire sauce.
7. Beach Bum
A truly exotic little number. Take some meat, something from the sea and a classic British sauce and what have you got?
Fried Spam, seaweed, Worcestershire sauce.
8. Sweet Banger
This combination again involves meat with something sweet. Sounds like a Hollywood marriage.
Sausages, marmalade or sliced fresh apple.
9. Tangy One
Cheese features highly in this smorgasbord, as you'd expect. Who hasn't eaten a cheese and pickle sandwich in their lifetime? Or a cheese and ham special? For those with more ambition how about this one:
Mature farmhouse cheddar, crisps (chips), fruit jam (jelly), and mayonnaise.
10. Double Date
This next concoction is for the discerning palate. At first it sounds a bit odd but the more you think about it the more you want to eat it?
Sliced fried potatoes, liver pate, cranberry jelly, french mustard.
11. Sweet Eve
This next one tastes much better on dark rye bread or pumpernickel as the Germans call it. Rumour has it that in some parts of Scotland certain takeaways offer deep fried Mars Bars for sale which makes this sandwich filler sound quite appetising!
Melted Snickers Bar, sliced apple, cold custard.
12. Seaside Delight
Fish fingers (fish sticks) in some people's eyes were made for bread slices. It's the way they line up so neatly onto the square sliced bread to produce an abstract picture fit for any modern art gallery. Now, try to imagine this next beauty on your plate.
Fish fingers (sticks), mayonnaise, mustard, sliced boiled egg, lettuce and balsamic vinaigrette.
13. Diner Mash
You'd be forgiven if you refused this next sandwich were it presented to you on fine bone china in a 5 star restaurant as guest of honour at the International Sandwich Maker's Guild annual world gathering.
Mashed potatoe, mashed hot dog sausage, sliced gherkins, sweet pickle, mayonnaise.
You're allowed to toast this one if you want to give it that extra zing.
14. Rabbit's Delight
OK. Vegans can start cheering. This exquisite green delight is ideal if you want to boost your vitamin and mineral intake. Probably best eaten in sunshine, in a garden, with ice cool water on the table.
Several lettuce leaves, cucumber slices, peppers, rocket leaf, parsley, chutney, white wine vinaigrette.
15. The Down Under
Depending on your budget, diet and lifestyle this next item could be a breakfast, lunch or dinner meal in one. This down to earth work of art hails from Australia, hence the inclusion of an optional Vegemite!
Fried strips of bacon, cooked noodles, a sprinkle of brown sugar, one poached egg.
16. Italian Submarine
This piece de resistance carries a warning. Treat with respect or the consequences could be alarming.
Fried Bologna, sliced tomatoe, mustard, tabasco sauce, sweet pickle, optional salad leaf.
Strong stomachs recommended for this filler.
17. Mabel's Vomit and Toenails
A definite low renter that's on a par with ketchup, brown sauce, apple jelly and prune juice spread thinly across white bread. With no additions!
Apricot puree spread thin as glue, plus thin apple slices, on white sliced.
18. The Dorchester Hobo
Sandwich experts will be puzzled by this curious meeting of common and exotic ingredients. You've heard of the down and out worth millions right? This is the sandwich equivalent.
Smoked salmon or trout, processed cheese slices, dill, gherkin, pickle, mayonnaise or salad cream.
19. The Hunter Gatherer
The low renter par excellence.
Leftover crisps (chips), bottom of jar mustard, diluted pickle remains.
20. The French Cavalier
A meaty compilation best eaten with close friends and carnivores who don't mind having their mouths full when smiling, laughing, burping, in conversation or simply staring at the walls.
Beef slices, stuffing (a mixture of onions, breadcrumbs and herbs), fried egg, capers, parsley, Worcestershire sauce, Dijon mustard.
21. The Country Millionaire
Served on wholemeal or home made bread this razzling nutritious magnificence will last you all day if eaten at just before noon (and washed down with juice or beer or ginger ale or milk).
Stilton cheese, sliced tomatoe, chopped onion, lettuce, pickle, English mustard, seasoning.
22. Home Run
Peanut butter makes its second appearance but don't be too hasty to try this student special which was hatched in the USA but could go viral. Best eaten on a toastie.
Peanut butter, grated apple/ spread, banana slices, mayonnaise.
23. Nurse's Leg, Matron's Leg, Dead Dog In A Blanket
Another low renter from the dark ages, served on crustless white bread or similar.
Suet (hard white fat from cows and other farm animals), strawberry jam (jelly).
24. Greek Popeye
One of those exotic sandwiches that come our way every so often - this can be developed to kingdom come because the basics are so solid. Best eaten toasted.
Sweet potatoe, spinach leaves, balsamic vinaigrette, fetta cheese.
Known as the widowmaker, this is a basic food best eaten by desperadoes, meat addicts and those who don't know any better.
Dripping (the cold white fat left over from cooked beef/pork), seasoning.
Guest Spot - Japanese Welcome
You'll want to compose a haiku after eating these delicious white bread delicacies.
Raw fish, yellow pickle, thin cheese, lettuce, herbs and seasoning.
Bonus Filler - The Dark Invader
An acquired taste. Best served on dark rye, roggebrod, pumpernickel.
Banana sliced, bacon, chocolate spread.
Your favourite sandwich filling?
So you've gone through all 25 extreme sandwich fillers. From the sublime to the ridiculous. Which one is the best for you, your all time favourite?
Beware plagiarists who steal content!
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© 2012 Andrew Spacey