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Spam, Rice, and Eggs--A Local Hawaiian Boy's Favorite!

Updated on June 4, 2013
Spam, eggs, and rice at the Uwajimaya Food Court in Seattle, Washington
Spam, eggs, and rice at the Uwajimaya Food Court in Seattle, Washington | Source

The #1 Place in the World Where Spam is Consumed

A markerThe Hawaiian Islands -
Hawaiian Islands, USA
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My Secret Life

Writing hubs is like having a secret alter ego...a Walter Mitty fantasy.

My wife grew up in a vegetarian household. I grew up on Kaua'i.

I just said a lot, didn't I?

So now that I'm sitting in a corner of the Walla Walla Senior Center--a clubhouse for old folks, as I fondly refer to it--on the threshold of my sexagenarian decade, and looking over my shoulders to make sure my dear wife isn't here yet to pick me up, I can wax nostalgic about one of my favorite foods...


Let me pause here to make sure that you and I are on the same page.

The spam I'm referring to isn't the horrendous amount of junk mail you find in your inbox each morning.

Rather, it's the morning food I long to wake up smelling long before I see it cooking in the frying pan.

Mmm! That savory fragrance! Instantly triggering the seesaw buildup of anticipation...the pull between the id and the superego...the tug of war tension between complete, utter abandon and restrained, civilized sophistication

And if you add scrambled eggs and rice...ah, primo!

Auwe! (Hawaiian for alas! ) What's a local boy to do?

The Dilemma of Being a Closet Meat-Eater in a Vegetarian Household

You know...I can be pretty resourceful...

I could very well truck on over to Walmart and pick up a can of Spam. It wouldn't be too hard to stash in my backpack.

That beautiful blue can is so conveniently made for hiding just about anywhere in the house. Let's see, where's the least likely place my wife would look?

Ah, yes! If I push the can hard enough, it'll fit snugly in the recesses of my shoe. Placing a balled up pair of socks at the opening will look so natural.

But, then, how could I cook the darn thing? My wife has the best sniffer in the whole world. If she wasn't already a terrific nurse, she'd have made a good training officer for the local cop shop's K9 unit.

I mean, Spam is so delicious, and its aromatic flavor lingers in the kitchen like a perpetual afterlife. No amount of spraying air freshener or lighting those obnoxious candles my better half is so crazy about would ever conceal its tantalizing meaty pheromones.

So slap me silly with a loaf of Spam!

It's reality check time.

The best I can do is to dream about it every now and then.

Like now...when I'm chewing on these carrot and celery sticks.


Submit a Comment

  • hawaiianodysseus profile image

    Hawaiian Odysseus 4 years ago from Southeast Washington state

    @rajan jolly

    Rajan, good for you for wanting to try it. It's a "local boy" (Hawaiian style) special. The McDonald's restaurants throughout the state of Hawai'i are the only ones in the nation that sell Spam Musubi--Spam, sushi style. During World War II, it became a staple for the soldiers overseas as well as a convenient food item, especially for the lower socioeconomic class in the islands who couldn't afford cuts of ham. It was so tasty that it appealed to everyone across the board. I grew up eating Spam, and while my diet has changed in the last few decades, I still recognize a twinge of nostalgia, not to mention a twinge in my nostrils, whenever I encounter this "ono" (Hawaiian for delicious) food. Thanks for participating in this hub experience, my friend. Always good to hear from you!


  • rajan jolly profile image

    Rajan Singh Jolly 4 years ago from From Mumbai, presently in Jalandhar,INDIA.

    Joe, I learnt today that spam meant something else too. Thanks for this lesson and I'm gonna have it when I come over there! It looks irresistible. I can already smell the aroma lifting off that delicious spread on top.

  • hawaiianodysseus profile image

    Hawaiian Odysseus 5 years ago from Southeast Washington state


    Ha-ha! Yeah, I remember those broken key small kid days! Thanks fo' stopping by, bruddah!

  • benisan85745 profile image

    Ka'imi'loa 5 years ago from Tucson, AZ.

    Wow...laulau! I remember getting lickings from my tutu fo' breaking the key off wrong back in my keiki days.