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Amusing Coffee Quotes & Polls for You!

Updated on August 29, 2015

A morning without coffee is like sleep.

Coffee Quotations for Scrapbooks, Twitter, and General Amusement

I love coffee. I love quotes. I love reading coffee quotations while drinking coffee. You too??! Small world.

Here are some great java sayings, latte laughs, espresso expressions...well, you get the idea. Also, since I love to shop, there are some cool gifty items for the coffee lover in your life. All good, clean fun. Just a giggle or two to get your mind percolating. (oh please stop me...)

In any case...enjoy these words and other delights as you sip (or gulp -- no one is judging you) your fabulous drink of choice.

Best place to have a cup of coffee?

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Coffee Quotes by Famous People

  • I never drink coffee at lunch. I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon. ~ Ronald Reagan
  • Without my morning coffee I'm just like a dried up piece of roast goat. ~ Johann Sebastian Bach
  • I put instant coffee in a microwave and almost went back in time. ~ Steven Wright

David Letterman on Java...

Way too much coffee.

But if it weren't for the coffee,

I'd have no identifiable

personality whatsoever.

Do you have a favorite coffee cup or mug?

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Which do you prefer?

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Quotes & Jokes about Decaf

(this unknown author guy sure gets around...)

  • Sleep is a symptom of caffeine deprivation. ~ Author Unknown
  • Decaffeinated coffee is the devil's blend. ~ Author Unknown
  • Decaffeinated coffee is kind of like kissing your sister. ~ Bob Irwin
  • I bought a decaffeinated coffee table, you can't even see a difference. ~ Author Unknown
  • Decaf? No, it's dangerous to dilute my caffeine stream. ~ Author Unknown
  • I don't have a problem with caffeine. I have a problem without caffeine! ~ Author Unknown
  • If it ain't caffeinated, it ain't coffee! ~ Author Unknown
  • Caffeine Allocation Error: COFFEE.SYS missing, Programmer halted. ~ Author Unknown

Life without coffee...

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My blood type is Starbucks.

Do you ever drink your coffee black?

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the finest organic suspension ever devised.

~ as said by Captain Janeway

on Star Trek: Voyager

Does your restaurant server's tip depend on your refill status?

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I don't say good morning until after my first coffee, because before that, it isn't.

How many cups of coffee do you drink on an average day?

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Which of these flavors would you be most likely to add to your coffee?

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When life gives you lemons, trade them for coffee.

Which of these coffee brands do you like best?

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Nothing makes sense before coffee.

What do you do when you are out of coffee?

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