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In Depth Poland Spring Bottle Review

Updated on March 22, 2016

The Bottle

Plastic. It's what comes to mind when many people of this planet we call Earth grab a bottle of Poland Spring Water. But there is so much more to this delicious bottle of H20. Just look at it. The curves. The Lines. The bottle cap. (I'm sweating in excitement). I mean just honestly, take 5 minutes of your day, and STARE at it. Do you see what I see? A work of ART. I honestly believe Poland Spring hired Picasso to create this timeless piece of craftsmanship.

The Water

Many of you may not know this, but Poland Spring water was "MADE for the NORTHEAST". That's at least what the bottle says, but I truly believe in that bold yet tough statement. I'm from New Jersey, and everyone here drinks Poland Spring, yet when I visit India, everyone drinks from the sewer pipes. They don't drink Poland Spring in India, it's insane. But enough of this talk, lets get back to the water.

The taste is unlike any other water I've ever had. It's truly remarkable. The ingredients from their website claim H20, but I believe they should add America to the ingredients. Poland Spring tastes like America. Donald Trump is going to make water great again.

The texture is something extraterrestrial. It feels like a molecule from outer space. Something not humanly. It somehow quenches thy thirst without consequence. I believe NASA should do a full analysis of this water.

Conclusion : This water tastes awesome and is probably made by ALIENS.

The end.

Full Nudity

Frontal Action
Frontal Action
Back Side Action for You Freaks ;)
Back Side Action for You Freaks ;)

RATE THIS WATER IF YOU'VE HAD IT

5 out of 5 stars from 1 rating of POLAND SPRING

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