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Traits of a Caffeine Addict

Updated on March 8, 2014

You Know You're Addicted to Coffee When ...

Caffeinated beverages certainly are addictive and helpful when you're feeling sleepy. The stimulant can be found in various quantities, from green tea to coffee to your energy drinks - though too much can be bad for your health.

I know I can't start work until I'm properly caffeinated (how many writers do you know that aren't dependent on caffeine??). It's hard to write or edit a novel if I'm falling asleep on my keyboard.

So, are you someone that can't start your day without a java jolt? Do you mainline on caffeine? If, like me, coffee is a huge part if your day, you might find the following signs of a caffeine addict relatable.

Image Credit: Renée Shearer

31 Signs of a Caffeine Addict

  1. You wake up and the first thing you do is make a pot of coffee.
  2. You go a day without coffee and you get headaches or a migraine.
  3. Running out of coffee becomes a matter of life or death.
  4. You consider a large cup of coffee to be small.
  5. You date a barista to get free espressos.
  6. You arrive at parties with a six pack AND coffee.
  7. You've named your mugs.
  8. You're drinking coffee right now.
  9. You lick the coffee pot clean.
  10. You think espresso beans are vegetables, hence;
  11. Your favourite snack is chocolate covered espresso beans.
  12. You believe decaf/unleaded is poisonous.
  13. It doesn't affect your sleep.
  14. You like to 'caff up' before doing anything (i.e work, going to a party, going to bed ... )
  15. You have an eye twitch.
  16. You can run and move faster than Flash.
  17. Your first-aid kit contains litre/pint of coffee and an IV hookup.
  18. You type seventy words-per-minute.


  19. You don't do instant.
  20. Your usual recipe is one bag of coffee per cup of water.
  21. You drink more than four cups a day.
  22. You spend more money on coffee than food each month.
  23. The barista at your regular coffee shop knows you by name.
  24. If (on the rare occasions) you aren't drinking coffee, then you're thinking about it.
  25. Your coffee mugs are bowl-sized.
  26. You get cranky when someone suggests you give up coffee.
  27. You must have a cup before going out for coffee - so you're alert enough to drink more coffee.
  28. You plan to be buried with a to-go cup in your hand.
  29. You don't remember what life was like before coffee.
  30. You've mapped out all the places that have free coffee.
  31. You bought/own a coffee bean plant.

Thoughts of a Caffeine Addict:

Yes, I can relate to most of these! When I run out of coffee, I have a mini-meltdown! I think instant coffee tastes yuck and would only drink it if it were the last caffeine source left on the planet (maybe not even then ...).

What are your thoughts?

Coffee Bean Plants - Why not grow your own?

If you love coffee, try growing coffee beans! It is also a unique gift for any coffee lover.

Seeds and Things Kona Coffee Bean 15 Tree Seeds -Coffea-Gourmet-Tropical
Seeds and Things Kona Coffee Bean 15 Tree Seeds -Coffea-Gourmet-Tropical

Never run out of coffee with this coffee with this coffee bean plant!

Coffee Bean 10 Seeds - Grow & Brew Your Own -SALE*
Coffee Bean 10 Seeds - Grow & Brew Your Own -SALE*

I would love one of these in my house! Would make a great gift, too, for any coffee lover.


How Many Cups of Coffee Do You Drink a Day?

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The DeLonghi Dolce Gusto Genio Coffeemaker - A great machine if you like your coffee to be made in ten seconds or less!

De’Longhi NESCAFÉ Dolce Gusto Genio Single Serve Coffee Maker and Espresso Machine - 21oz Capacity – Capsule Based
De’Longhi NESCAFÉ Dolce Gusto Genio Single Serve Coffee Maker and Espresso Machine - 21oz Capacity – Capsule Based

I love this coffee machine! I have one and it's amazing! Make coffee in around ten seconds. Why not grab one for yourself or a friend?

NESCAFÉ Dolce Gusto Coffee Capsules – Espresso – 48 Single Serve Pods, (Makes 48 Cups)  48 Count
NESCAFÉ Dolce Gusto Coffee Capsules – Espresso – 48 Single Serve Pods, (Makes 48 Cups) 48 Count

Grab some capsules for Genio while you're at it! Makes a fine espresso if you ask me ...


Are You Addicted?

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Fellow Caffeine Addicts - Got Anything to Add? What's Your Favourite Caffeinated Beverage?

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    • RHKnight profile image

      RHKnight 4 years ago

      I love coffee too much to give it up. But I am not as far in as I could be maybe. Great lens, if it were mine I would dress it up with some more merch. Just me though. Thanks for the jolt of caffeinated squidooing.

    • Aibrean82 profile image

      Aibrean82 4 years ago

      This was fun to read, and especially so since I have a friend who is... well... all of the above! As of now I get too wired from coffee to be able to drink more than a up or two a day.

    • thegrayrabbit profile image

      thegrayrabbit 4 years ago

      Very nice lens and thanks for reminding me that I am addicted to caffeine/coffee.

    • floppypoppygift1 profile image

      floppypoppygift1 4 years ago

      I tried to kick coffee during my last pregnancy and the results were disastrous! I had terrible migraines. In the end I decided to simply cut my coffee intake to 1/2 cup of coffee a day with lots of milk! Cheers~cb

    • ukprowriter profile image

      ukprowriter 4 years ago

      I used to be addicted to coffee but its tea now. I just replaced one caffeine fix for another. I think the addiction is worse now as I drink twice as much tea than I ever did coffee. Good lens