Lying, cheating, abuse, I dont care because i love him/her

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   goldengirl88posted 12 years ago

   So there is this couple they have been married eight years, violence has occured within the relationship periodically over the last eight years. Not very often but upon occassion, where both would hit each other during an arguement, she supposedly would be the first to hit him and then in his defence he would hit her back. An example, occured with him kicking her car, and then jumping on the roof while she was inside.
   Another incident occured when she barged through the bathroom to get to her son as the he was yelling at him for vomiting.
   
   She often asked people to lie to him in regards to money issues, and other details like if the kids did something wrong, though that being said she is also extremely tough on the kids too. For example, she lied to her husband telling him there were savings in the bank, when infact there were none, telling him she was transferring the money over.
   
   Now the husband recently had an affair, where he fell in love with someone else. He had previously spoken with someone over the internet, but the other woman refused to meet him. The wife found out about this one too, by going through his emails. Now the husband admitted to this new affair, and said he wanted to be with the other woman, but then agreed to work things out with his wife. However, he did not stop the affair right away. He even told both women at the same time he loved them both, but then went back to the wife.
   
   Now when his wife found out about the affair she did hit him a few times (though this may be understandable). He continued to help with the kids but on a couple of occassions he mentioned wanting to kill himself and his children to make her suffer.
   After finding him texting the other woman, they fought again where he locked her out of the house, she then proceeded to break down the door and smash through the glass to get inside. She then hit him, and he kicked her to get her off him as she was trying to get the kids from him as he was putting them in the car. The couple then proceeded to play "chicken" with each other with her eventually giving up and him later dropping the kids back of at the house in the car. After this he moved to his parents house, but they once again tried to reconcile.
   
   After they reconciled, they once again fought and this time because she refused to give him the keys so he could get his stuff out of the car, he smashed the car window. He then told her to get in the car, where she asked if he was going to kill her, he said hop in and find out! After he took her for a "drive" he told her to go get the kids and then get back in the car, she did not come back out of her parents house so he went in, where her dad attacked him and she later hit him with a fry pan several times. He was arrested and the police put an avo against him and he had to face four other charges.
   
   Because of third party involvement her friends who acted as go betweens the wife pleaded with the court, making a speech of how mcuh she loved him and how amazing he was, and what an amazing husband and father he was so the court reduced the charges and the avo and he was allowed to see her and the kids again, they once again got back together straight away. Keep in mind too that at the same time he was leading the other woman on too.
   
   The next incident occured after the pair and the kids went away for the day for more time together. Upon returning home the two once again fought, this time he takes her and the kids for a "drive" to make her scared i guess. When they get home he tells her to go inside and make the kids dinner, he goes and gets an axe and tells her and the kids to hop on the lounge where he then swings the axe at her head, well beside it. Later on in the evening i assume they leave the kids all under 6 at home and he blindfolds his wife and takes her out too a backwood road and tells her to lie down, of which she complies. He then proceeds to attempt to run her over stopping about one meter in front of her. They than go home where she makes him eat and she wants once again to work things out with him.
   
   she is the persistant one with them getting back togther, but he also loves her. All returns to normal, they go away the next weekend and have a nice romantic time.
   
   A few weeks later in order to see if she is lying about a particular incident he puts her and the kids in the car and by driving dangerously he threatens to kill her in front of the kids. After this incident they call a a babysitter and he takes her out to dinner, follow by a movie the next night.
   
   The last incident she took of with the kids in the car no seatbelts at midnight and he pursued. They kept bumping each other in there cars and she lost control of the car, nearly killing herself and the kids ( no one was hurt, but almost rolled the car), she called the police, but refused to give a statement he was charged with breaking the avo along with other charges. He said that he wished they had died, but he loves them/ her supposly.
   
   so should they be together, and would you consider this love.

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      Marisa Wrightposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      No and no.

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         sofsposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         That was very emphatic... and rightly so

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      EmpressFelicityposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      If it weren't for those poor children of theirs, I'd say they should definitely stay together. They're both so dysfunctional that staying together would prevent them from forming relationships with anyone else and thereby blighting two more lives.
      
      
      
      
      Gawd no.
      
      Just what is it about the idea of love that makes people go misty eyed when a person says "I love him/her" when all the evidence provided by that person's actions points to the contrary?

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         kerrygposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         "If it weren't for those poor children of theirs, I'd say they should definitely stay together. They're both so dysfunctional that staying together would prevent them from forming relationships with anyone else and thereby blighting two more lives."
         
         Agreed about the parents, but regardless of whether they stay together or not, somebody needs to get those kids out of there asap!
         
         My husband was coming home late from a family party one night when a drunk, angry man streaked by him at about 100 miles an hour in an attempt to "scare" his wife. Moments later, the guy lost control and slammed into a tree. The older of their two sons was killed instantly - he was thrown from his seat and his head was crushed between the car and the tree. The younger boy survived, but with serious injuries. It sounds to me like it's only a matter of time before the unfortunate children of this couple meet a similar fate.

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            EmpressFelicityposted 12 years agoin reply to this

            I occasionally read stories like this in the paper and they always leave me shaking my head in disbelief.
            
            How can anyone claim to love their children if they pull stunts like this?

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      litsabdposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Love is gracious...do you see any grace in that? NO....that's the answer....

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   Emile Rposted 12 years ago

   There is a prime example of why some courts in America have decided not to pursue prosecution in domestic disputes.
   
   That's a horribly unfortunate situation for the kids. It reminds me of a demented woman I once knew. Her 8 year old son was finally rescued by social services, but not until after he went out and laid down on a busy street because he wanted to die.
   
   I hope the children in your story survive the insanity.

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   goldengirl88posted 12 years ago

   Hi everyone
   i agree with you all! Being in Australia our legal system has just started to crack down on domestic violence regardless of what the so called victims wants and will procucute the offender even without the consent of the victim, which is a good thing! But i think she should be procucted as well in the case, because she has been guity all most as much as him.
   And i think yeah if these two get back togther then yeah there is a huge possibility that there three kids will end either dead, or with servere issues later on. Though i must say our welfare system sucks and have not done anything regardless of complants made on behalf of the kids

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4. 60

   SomewayOuttaHereposted 12 years ago

   ...scanned the op...physical/emotional abuse on both sides...sounds like a relationship from hell...and enabling each other too.....WOW!....

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