How do you introduce a new boyfriend/girlfriend or a partner into your children's life?
What is the proper way to introduce the new love of your life to your children? I can see that when the children are facing separation syndrome from what they are used to - their old families which the parents are intact. A new set up could bring some problem to stability of the children. How do you go about it?
You need to make absolute sure that your kids are ready for the introduction. I would even keep the person secret until you know the kids are ready because this is a huge deal to them. Kids react differently, even among both their parents. By this I mean that some will accept the father finding a new love but not the mother and vice versa.
When you're sure they're ready, move super slowly. Maybe make it aware that you are going on dates, then involve your kid(s) on some while making them the center of attention. Just don't force them on the outings if they are not into it. It can be very, very difficult to adapt to a new person in their parent's life and a lot of kids have a tough time letting go of the fact that moomy and daddy won't make up.
I dated a nice man for a while, but I didn't introduce him to my kids until I knew him pretty well. Even then, I kept it very casual and short, and didn't at all push the issue. I was super glad I'd taken this approach, because when we went our separate ways they had no attachment to him and barely noticed. It would have been really hard to know I'd caused them the pain of losing someone besides their own dad.
Give them a talk before hand so it is not an entirely awkward situation. However, it is never a good road dating with children who like their other parent. The situation gets messy and they will never accept your new "partner".
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