Any tips for an adult parent going back to school full time?
I start college in 17 days. Very nervous about having children and keeping a school, homemaker, mom, and me balance with a husband who works 50 hours a week. Can anyone offer tips on how to prepare, what to expect, or how to keep a balance?
If you have several young children, I'm afraid you are overextending yourself. My husband also works long hours (professor) and I did not do grad school until my youngest was in grade school. I recommend online classes for flexibility, since kids will still get sick or have other emergencies and I assume you are the main transporter of children. Please don't buy into the lie that a woman can have "it all" all at the same time. You can do "it all" eventually, over a lifetime.
Try to have meals in the freezer and an arsenal of pantry meals--those you can fix by just opening some cans and boiling some pasta or rice. And if the kids are older, they can certainly learn to do laundry or other helpful tasks.
Hi Peeples, returning to school as a mother and wife is certainly a struggle but it can be done with determination. I returned to school and got my BA and then continued and just received my doctoral degree all the while with 5 children. My youngest was 5 and the oldest 16 when I started. When I was in school for my BA mind you I was still working a full-time job. It takes work and a joint effort. Daycare may be needed if you can afford to do so. I would do group homework sessions so that my children could get help on their homework while I was doing mine. My husband also worked but we split up chores and the older children began chipping in. My experience was that I could not be where I am now without everyone's help but that is what families do. Always find time for your husband, even if it is just going on a grocery store date or relaxing with him while watching television. Also I found it helpful to not be so controlling and expect everything to be done, somethings had to be put to the side for a moment. GOOD LUCK in your journey, if you think positive thoughts then you can achieve anything
When possible consider doing some of your classes online; that helped me immensely with balance because I lived 40 minutes from campus. If you need to, drop to part time and don't try to do too many credits at once, especially the first semester. If you do go full time, balance your classes to have one harder one and a couple that are easier for you. For example I had a very demanding art class one semester that required 12 hours of studio time per week and I took it at the same time as an advanced English course online thinking it would be ok - it wasn't, I really struggled to maintain my 4.0 which my scholarship required that semester. Balance your classes - demanding and not as demanding!
As for the house, get used to a messy house for awhile - it's all good. You have to prioritize and there is just some stuff that isn't going to get done and that can be hard to deal with if you're a bit of a "type A" like myself. I had to learn to let go of some stuff and fortunately my other half was very supportive. He didn't work as many hours as your husband does though.
For me, organizing my time on paper each day was how I managed to get the most done without feeling stressed and frazzled. I made prioritized lists (still do) each morning and went down the list - what didn't get done didn't and that had to be ok.
I had to learn to reorganize my time. Time management is so important. There may be times your sleep will be short but in the long run it's well worth it. My older children had to learn to help in the house a little more - I made sure their chores were reasonable and that they were able to maintain them responsibly.
One of the hardest things for me was letting messes happen - it initially drove me crazy lol but then I learned that there's a big difference between having a mess and being filthy - and by no means were we filthy lol
The other hard thing was making sure I was still able to give my kids enough time. I prepared them by letting them know that i was going to be going back to school and there would be less time for me but reminded them that are the most important thing in my life and my love would not change.
I learned that by them watching how hard I worked, it encouraged the importance of schooling to them - they realized sometimes mommy doesnt like her homework either but she has to do it because it's important to have an education. I watched them work harder at reching their own goals and I really wasnt expecting that so it worked well for us.
I made it clear that I wasn't only doing this for myself but I was doing it for them as well, along with the other people I wanted to help. They learned valuable lessons in that.
I made the most of my time with them. I still made sure we had movie night (more at home than anything) alternated for game nights, and made sure they were able to come to me if they needed me for any reason. They learned when to be patient with me, they also learned how to resolve issues on thier own, and not once did any of them come to me in sadness feeling neglected or unloved, thank God!
Talking to them and preparing them ahead of time is probably the most important thing you can do. Of course, there are also ways to give time to your spouse - any interaction, as long as you're genuine, will help him to remember he's not least in your life. Set a date night once a month for just the two of you, engage him, ask him his opinioin (whether or not you actually want it lol) Make sure he still feels loved & wanted by you and he'll be ok. Education is a great thing to invest in - you can do it - you have to figure what works best for you and your family.
God bless you.
It's scary but doable, with determination and at times a box of tissues because if you're anything like me you will need them at some point or another. I have written a hub with basic tips so feel free to have a look, remember time for you and your family, remember you're not infallible, remember your end goal and I promise the pride when you graduate despite all you have going on is fantastic
by dashingscorpio 8 years ago
Would it upset you if you learned your husband or wife gave their (ex) money to help them out?Assuming his or her ex came to them asking for money or simply told them they were having a hard time. Would it upset you to learn your spouse withdrew money from an account to give to their ex? Would it...
by alexandriaruthk 11 years ago
Should stay at home mom expect their husband to help them with housework and childcare?Being a full time stay at home mom is tiring specially if there are small children to take care. It is like working full time and more than that. Is it right to demand that their husband should help in the...
by R D Langr 5 years ago
Is it better to fill up your gas tank all at once, or little by little ($15 at a time).I drive a moderate amount, and I usually fill up my tank with about $15 worth a time, unless its at a low price or I'm going on a long trip--then I fill it up completely. Is this an economically efficient...
by winter11 13 years ago
I have a son who recently turned four and every night before we start his bedtime stories I show him how to bless himself and i read to him from his prayer book for children and then I read to him from his bible. I also take him to church and when we go I dress up and I have him wear dress...
by EinsFloW 13 years ago
Do you still use things that you learned in high school?
by Grace Marguerite Williams 7 years ago
ARE there MORE advantages or disadvantages being THE YOUNGEST child in the family? Why?Furthermore, how does FAMILY SIZE influence how the youngest child is treated in his/her family? Also, how does family size determine THE STATUS of the youngest child in comparison to his/her OLDEST sibling?
Copyright © 2024 The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers on this website. HubPages® is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website.
Copyright © 2024 Maven Media Brands, LLC and respective owners.
As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.
For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://corp.maven.io/privacy-policy
Show DetailsNecessary | |
---|---|
HubPages Device ID | This is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons. |
Login | This is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service. |
Google Recaptcha | This is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy) |
Akismet | This is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy) |
HubPages Google Analytics | This is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy) |
HubPages Traffic Pixel | This is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized. |
Amazon Web Services | This is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy) |
Cloudflare | This is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Hosted Libraries | Javascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy) |
Features | |
---|---|
Google Custom Search | This is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Maps | Some articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Charts | This is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy) |
Google AdSense Host API | This service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Google YouTube | Some articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Vimeo | Some articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Paypal | This is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Facebook Login | You can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Maven | This supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy) |
Marketing | |
---|---|
Google AdSense | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Google DoubleClick | Google provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Index Exchange | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Sovrn | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Facebook Ads | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Amazon Unified Ad Marketplace | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
AppNexus | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Openx | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Rubicon Project | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
TripleLift | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Say Media | We partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy) |
Remarketing Pixels | We may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites. |
Conversion Tracking Pixels | We may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service. |
Statistics | |
---|---|
Author Google Analytics | This is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy) |
Comscore | ComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy) |
Amazon Tracking Pixel | Some articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy) |
Clicksco | This is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy) |