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I'm calling you out...

Updated on March 20, 2013

Outside that is!

Now I know the world can be a scary place…especially if all you know are video games…but it can also be a lot of fun too. I just have a few things to go over with you before you step outside the front door.

The graphics are going to be better than anything you’ve ever seen…so try not to freak out. The bright glowing orb in the sky is not a power button, so please don't try to turn it off…your eyes will adjust in a minute or so. I must also warn you that more often than not, the gameplay and storyline are going to suck…but that is not a reason to go running back inside.

When it comes to communicating with others…out here people's names don't appear over their heads, you must talk to them to find out what their “gamertag” is. Please remember… if you want to speak to someone out here in the real world you have to make eye contact with them and speak without using internet slang (and a mic)…and it’s a good idea to physically laugh when someone says something funny instead of just saying “LOL”…that’s just strange.

If someone says something nice to you and/or does something nice for you there is no “like” button to show them you appreciate it and/or agree…you must actually tell them. There is also no message box that pops up to let you know when your friends (and I use that term loosely) are outside…here you have to do a little leg work if you want to find out that information.

I can guarantee you won't find anyone named KillerDeathSlayer27 out here either, so don’t sweat it if your name is just Bob…that’s alright. Also, the mailman is not an enemy soldier; don't try to knife him…that would be very bad.

Don’t try to stomp on people’s heads that you don’t get along with…they don’t like that…and they’ll probably end up beating you down. So you know…if you happen to go to prison…you won’t find a princess there...that is unless that is what Bubba calls you while you're holding onto his belt stay out of trouble.

There are no giant floating coins for you to collect either…you must get a job if you want to buy things…like groceries and clothes…not potions and swords…I know it sucks but we all have to do it.

Finally, stay out of the road…if you get hit there is no respawn…it’s game over…like for real…no more lives.



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    • MichaelJohnMele profile image

      Michael John Mele 4 years ago from Seffner, Florida

      @marykatbpc thank you so much for the kind words.

    • marykatbpc profile image

      Mary Hill 4 years ago from Southern United States

      Love the wit and the use of sarcasm to actually point out reality in a way that makes you laugh and think deeper at the same time.

    • MichaelJohnMele profile image

      Michael John Mele 4 years ago from Seffner, Florida

      @Rebeccamealey thank you so very much for the kind words...I really appreciate it.

    • rebeccamealey profile image

      Rebecca Mealey 4 years ago from Northeastern Georgia, USA

      Well written. Cute and entertaining! I am not much into video games, I like jewels...and I used to really love the old pacman !

    • MichaelJohnMele profile image

      Michael John Mele 4 years ago from Seffner, Florida

      @Sunshine625 I never really got into Farmville...but I did have my fair share of video game addictions that kept me indoors...especially when I was trust me, I can relate.

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

      I could relate to this. A couple of years ago I was a Farmville addict. It wasn't good. Luckily I kicked the habit cold turkey and never looked back. Ha!

    • MichaelJohnMele profile image

      Michael John Mele 4 years ago from Seffner, Florida

      @Theophanes I won't hold it against you that you're not a gamer...we all make mistakes in life...just playing...thanks for reading and commenting.

    • Theophanes profile image

      Theophanes 4 years ago from New England

      I'm not a gamer but that was very cute. Thanks for the laugh. :)

    • MichaelJohnMele profile image

      Michael John Mele 4 years ago from Seffner, Florida

      @Eiddwen thank you very much.

    • Eiddwen profile image

      Eiddwen 5 years ago from Wales

      Very interesting indeed;thanks for sharing and voted up.


    • MichaelJohnMele profile image

      Michael John Mele 5 years ago from Seffner, Florida

      @Ghaelach you are so nowadays don't know what they are missing. When we were young we had a blast playing outside...we didn't come home until the street lights were on and our mom was yelling for us.

      @Anthony Binks you know what...they really should. Don't get me wrong, I do love a good video game, but I also love life and enjoying it to the fullest.

    • Anthony Binks profile image

      Anthony Binks 5 years ago from Northern Ireland

      Very very interesting hub.

      Computer programmers should have that as a warning at the the end of any game.

      Great hub, thanks.

    • profile image

      Ghaelach 5 years ago

      Morning Michael.

      A super hub and a great skit on the gaming world. I think if you showed this hub to a young person they start laughing at you saying you where a fiction writer, or worse, that you where weird. Try telling them that there was life before Microsoft.

      LOL Ghaelach