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Is this bad; is my life (as a man) over as I know it?

Updated on December 21, 2012

Last night I was hanging out with my girlfriend (believe it or not I actually have one...and it's not the blow up kind either) watching a little TV. After the show we were watching was over, we decided to try the game we just picked up, which was You Don’t Know Jack. We played a few matches and she won most of them, honestly I wasn’t really too concerned with the outcome because I always knew she was smarter than me...which is pretty much the case for any other couple too.

I then figured, let’s play something that I knew for sure I would beat her in, so I put in Marvel vs. Capcom 3. As silly as it sounds, I wanted to end the night with both of us knowing I was the superior gamer out of the two of us...and the pants wearer in the family

So I’m standing there beating on my chest like I was Tarzan and she was Jane as I popped in the disc. I sat beside her on the couch and it was on, we picked our fighters and we were off, and I was feeling pretty confident that I was about to administer a butt whooping. The fight starts and at first we’re pretty even, then out of nowhere my first guy is knocked out, then the second, finally the third falls...I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.

After the match, she let out this little school girl like giggle and said “you let me win” and of course me being the gentleman I am, I agreed. I had to redeem myself so we went again, this time I won but not by much. She suggested we do best two out of three, I thought in my head I didn’t want to take any more chances, so I tried a Jedi mind trick on her. I waived my hand in front of her face, telling her we already played three times and I won twice, so I was the ultimate winner.

I could tell she wasn’t really buying it, so I turned the system off in a huff and went it to the bedroom, of course with my tail between my legs...and now wearing the dress. I know for the most part Marvel vs. Capcom 3 is a button masher, but come on, this was like something out of the Twilight Zone...she doesn’t even play video games that often.

I don’t mind losing to a girl, but not to one who asks me to hand her the joystick (get your mind out of the gutter) instead of a controller.



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    • MichaelJohnMele profile imageAUTHOR

      Michael John Mele 

      6 years ago from Seffner, Florida

      Unfortunately mine is.

    • moonfairy profile image


      6 years ago

      my mind is never in the gutter.......................LOL

    • cfin profile image


      7 years ago from The World we live in

      This exact thing has happened to me with every game I have ever loved. My wife has even taken up playing civilization and..... well since I have been playing it since I was about 10, and for her, its new, Im a little stumped as to how she is so good at it. She evn beat me at Fifa! the first time she ever played it! and I never explained to her what button was for what....

      Most people suck at civilization. Its just not OK to be that good at it the first time!! And yes, it was a good time to sulk!!

    • MichaelJohnMele profile imageAUTHOR

      Michael John Mele 

      7 years ago from Seffner, Florida

      @JohnGreasyGamer Dark Souls you say...I may just do that. It would be cruel, but at least I would get my pants back...I like the way you think my friend.

    • JohnGreasyGamer profile image

      John Roberts 

      7 years ago from South Yorkshire, England

      Don't worry, I'm the same for the most part. But in the end, you've got to remember that pants (and trousers) were made for men! Skirts and dresses are for women! So in the end, mankind was always intended to wear pants! YOU MUST BE THE FAMILY PANT-WEARER! Boast about how good you are at something like Dark Souls, then get her to play it on her own. THEN you'll feel better. ^^

    • MichaelJohnMele profile imageAUTHOR

      Michael John Mele 

      7 years ago from Seffner, Florida

      @JohnGreasyGamer are you sure...I mean I look like a man and I have all the body parts of a man...but it seems as if I'm now the chick in the relationship. Today she's beating me at video games, and tomorrow, she's just beating me...someone please call 911!

    • JohnGreasyGamer profile image

      John Roberts 

      7 years ago from South Yorkshire, England

      Don't worry, I'm sure you're better than me at that game. Unless crouching and doing spin-kick is a winning move, in which I'm a master at pulling off. Nice story though, but you're still a man. If you don't believe me, listen to a song from Orgazmo called "Now you're a man". Or a "Mayunn" in the lead singer's case.

      Voted up, funny and beautiful. Remember: real men come up with excuses to lose! Say you had your other hand busy with arm-wrestling the Couchsatan, and you couldn't concentrate on both things. I have a Couchsatan called William, he likes to nibble on the cushions and bring hellfire down from the skies.


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