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Other Fears © Rolly A. Chabot

Updated on April 3, 2015

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Welcome Again

Welcome again to the Fireside, it seems like I have more to say than I thought today, so I am back again. I see a few have stayed and left some comments and it is good to touch base with you again.

As always there is room for another, if you are new welcome. Please introduce yourself and feel at home. Help yourself to refreshments and anything you can find to snack on. If you leave crumbs, please do not worry about them. I have this four legged vacuum cleaner that is energy efficient and always hopeful, Quigley the faithful will find the smallest of morsel

Since I last wrote close to a year ago there is another addition to the family "Gizmo" or sometimes known as "Cat Face." Just a young Tabby, but smart as a whip and can fetch better than Quigley. Toss the ball upstairs and he entertains himself by the hour chasing it back down the stairs. Carries it back up and rolls it down and chases it again. Great until it starts to happen at 3 in the morning. Once you pet him once he is your buddy... so make yourself at home and above all else know that you are dearly loved.

Fear of Heights

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The Cure

I was one of those rough and tumble kids that thought nothing of taking changes. My poor Dad was always taking me to the hospital for one thing or another. Many family stories and much laughter over the years were the result of some of my historical daredevil events. One was a serious fall off a high ladder. I landed hard, knocked the wind out of myself and was eventually went unconscious from a nasty bump on the head, let alone the bruises and result fear that developed of heights. Four foot off the ground and my knees were knocking like the engine in my first car.

For years I avoided heights, I suppose because I scared myself half to death, let alone my poor parents. I would have friends come over and do any of the high work. Not me, well not until I decided it was time to do something about it. Skydiving was the challenge and I took it on. After hours in a classroom, watching videos and near vomiting as I climbed onto the airplane, I was ready. I had even talked a dear friend who was 25 years my senior to come along. George had been a pilot for years and it was not until we were in the air did I share with him my fears. It was later I learned that was how George spent his first Canada Pension Check on learning to dive from what he called a perfectly good aircraft.

I watched as George stepped out onto the wheel and held onto the wing strut at 4000 feet did I know I was next. With a great smile he fell back, and I was next. Well to add insult to fear I stepped out to early and the pilot did not have his foot on the brakes of the wheels and the result was me doing a very fancy exit from the plane and screaming until the chute opened. It was then I realized I had conquered a fear. Maybe not as gracefully as George but the chute was open. It was the longest 8 minutes of my life and I loved every minute of it. I came in with a perfect two point landing and the fear was gone.

I later went back several times and also became a tandem jumper, where people would be strapped to me and I would provide the thrill of free flight from 9000 feet to 3000 where the chute would be deployed. It was a very exciting time as all the fear was gone.

Fear of Water

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Fear of Water

I suppose I may sound like a person filled with fear of many things after reading the past few hubs. I suppose you may be right but I attribute many fears I had as being self inflicted. Water was another.

I recall the day this first took hold. You see I was raised around water, swimming in dirty old sloughs invested with bloodsucker, dirty rivers were a part of my childhood. The first time I ever swam in a real swimming pool was a day which taught me a new respect for where I was. Being a kid and all excited I dove headlong into the pool and struck my head so hard things went black for what seemed an eternity. I swear I swallowed half the pool that day. Thankfully some kid stepped on me and brought me to my senses. Needless to say I had water coming from my mouth and my nose when I surfaced. Not one person noticed me, so I was cool. I laugh now recalling looking at the lifeguard that was more concerned aboit talking to some young lady than looking after his charges.

Yet another time I was at a week long camp for kids at the lake. A small lake in comparison to many, a half mile across and the challenge came to swim across, a pick up boat would be close at hand. Not close enough for me as I ended with a severe cramp in my leg and was unable to swim any further. The lesson learned is lake water tastes far different that pool water. Try treading water in the middle of a lake with a badly cramped leg.

Years later I watched a Scuba Diver come to the Golf Course where I was the Superintendent. In a mere few hours he made a few thousand dollars with recovery of many, would be bad golf shots. It was then the wheels started to grind away. I proposed to the golf course board if I were to get certified and buy all my own equipment I would have the exclusive right to dive at the course. They agreed and my dread of water disappeared as I discovered I could actually breath under water. I went on to be a certified dive instructor as well as being certified for tri-mixed gases that allowed me to dive to 420 feet. I ran a small sideline business that specialized in recovery dives of all sorts including drowning victims. I did the recovery for the Royal Canadian Mounted Police.

Speed

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Fear of Speed

Speed never really was a fear but more a danger, one could say the need to live on the edge of insanity maybe. Over the years I have built many Hot Rods and the bigger the motor the faster I could go. Sadly many of them ended up as wrecks and thankfully I survived. At least with a vehicle there is some protection but a motorcycle is a whole other being of its own.

It started with a smaller bike and progressed to one that I had rebuilt from the ground up. The engine I had rebuilt and blueprinted to my specs. On it maiden run I clocked a speed of 260 km per hour. Converted to the old standard speed that is 162 miles per hour.

When I think back now at just how much rubber was actually on the road, the chance of a small pebble, warm tar or anything causing a deflection, I would not have even had a chance to kiss my butt goodbye. Let alone of course the amount of me that would have been spread over a vast area, mainly being a small grease spot somewhere in the distance.

Should we fear speed, certainly as it can kill or seriously injure yourself and many people. Do I still drive fast... really a redundant question. To be honest, yes there are times when I do kick in the turbos on my slightly, well majorly modified Dodge Dart. Somethings never change and I blame the kid in me. "Bad Kid... stop it, Oh look here I have an open road and no traffic coming... lol... enough said. I still get a kick out of the young kid who pulls up beside me at the lights, you know the ones with the booming stereo and the jam can on the end of his tail pipe. The look on his face is priceless as this old fart, slightly balding and all but grey hair leaves him sitting in a cloud of blue rubber. But that is just me having fun.






Do I need Therapy... Maybe

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Taking Chance and living

I think we have all said the words "If I could live that moment again." Would you change it?

So how is it we face our fears, how do we defeat what has defeated us for years? The answer lives deep within us, searching for the root cause of our fears and dealing with it in our own way. I do not recommend taking things to the limits as I have chosen over the years unless you feel the need.

Often people sit in a quiet place and do some soul searching, maybe for some of us we seek it through our faith. No matter what you choose I think it important you fully understand it important to face it head on. Journal if you like, share with a loved and trusted friend and see what transpires from it.

I believe each and every one of us has been uniquely and wonderfully made and when our lives are altered through a fear then we fail to live a full life unable to experience all we can. In closing I think I would have to use a quote that I am not certain I read or one that I have fabricated. "Limits exist only in our minds and the roads I have travelled have brought to where I find myself today."

Be well my friends and live well, at the end of the day when you place your head on the pillow be proud of who you are and what you have accomplished... Many hugs attached as always...



© Rolly A. Chabot

Rest and Reflect

Death

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Fear of Death

Many people I talk with share one of the greatest fears they have is death. Over the years I have seen enough death like many of you. Yes it is a scary thought. A number of years ago I sat late one evening with a lady friend, she was a lovely vibrant young lady. Someone who had a life of dreams, ambitions and goals she had set out for herself. I often enjoyed her company, so fun loving and caring for others. She had shared with me a few times her faith and yes her fear of suffering a terrible death like others she had known.

It was late that night and she still had to travel a fair distance to get home. It was snowing that night, a heavy wet snow. She asked if I could follow her and make certain she had arrived home a few miles from my cabin. I had a few last minute things to do and left shortly after her. I recall the night as plain as I sit here now. All I could see were the two tracks on the highway she had left. Far ahead a bright orange glow reflected off the night sky. I found my friend that night, she had slid coming into a curve and lost control plunging off the side of the road and into some large rocks. Her car exploded and burst into flames. By the time I arrived I was too late, all I could see was her skeleton inside, the car completely engulfed in flame. The heat was so intense I could do nothing but call the police and stand by. It had a profound effect on me, even writing about it some 35 years later I sit on the verge of tears.

For those who know me and are aware of my background as a Pastor and a Christian today I can say I have no fear of death as I am reassured something far greater lies ahead. The blessings in this case was she never suffered according to the Coroner. He said death would have been instant, such a reminder of just how fast life can end.

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    • aviannovice profile image

      Deb Hirt 2 years ago from Stillwater, OK

      The only thing we have to fear is fear itself, but we cannot live in a cocoon. I have taken plenty of chances, and come up well, but when your time is up, it is up.

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 2 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Bravewarrior... I can certainly appreciate what you and Ruby say in regards to highways and byways and the congestion we see. Any issue such as a blown tire can cause havoc... so glad to hoary made it ok...

      Hugs from Canada

    • bravewarrior profile image

      Shauna L Bowling 2 years ago from Central Florida

      I share Ruby's fear of highways. Several years ago I totaled my car doing 80 on the interstate. My tire blew out and my car sped around backwards and ended up a few feet from the swamp. I was sure I was going to die, but I was unharmed. A couple years after that, I had a panic attack while driving on the interstate. I just can't do it. If I can't get somewhere via back roads, I just don't go.

    • bravewarrior profile image

      Shauna L Bowling 2 years ago from Central Florida

      I share Ruby's fear of highways. Several years ago I totaled my car doing 80 on the interstate. My tire blew out and my car sped around backwards and ended up a few feet from the swamp. I was sure I was going to die, but I was unharmed. A couple years after that, I had a panic attack while driving on the interstate. I just can't do it. If I can't get somewhere via back roads, I just don't go.

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 2 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi LastHeart ... Great to see you here and welcome to the Fireside. I hope you find something more to your liking... The Fireside is a safe place with an open door to all who pay a visit.

      Thanks for the comment and yes I do believe we need to face those fears... Lol... As long as it's on the safe side, a blessing to be watched over at all times now.

      Hugs and blessings

    • Lastheart profile image

      Maria Magdalena Ruiz O'Farrill 2 years ago from Borikén the great land of the valiant and noble Lord

      Rolly I hardly can write due to technology problems, but I read this hub and I just had to say that I hope many get the opportunity to read it. Thanks for sharing your fears it takes bravery to do so. I am so happy to know you have faith in our Creator, Lord, and Savior.

      Blessings

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 2 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Ruby... thank you for your comment and I feel for you with the fears you have mentioned. In today's world both air travel and interstate or high volume traffic are a fact of life. It is possible the fear you have is from the statistics of both modes of transportation.

      We have two major roadways in this part of my little world, both are built for speed and have posted limits. These limits are rarely adhered too and the result is when there is an accident it is generally one which makes the news. In Canada the speed on these major roadways are generally in the 70 mph range and yet most people travel 15 to 20 miles per hour and the law seems to turn a blind eye which is sad when you think of the losses which can occur.

      As a Christian I do not believe in the reincarnation concept. I do believe we die but once, our bodies are made in the image of Christ, They return to the dust which they are made of and our soul and spirit are returned for judgement. The reincarnation concept is born from the Buddhist and Hindu belief system only. I hope this gives you somewhat of an answer.

      I do love the backroads much better anyway, great way to slow down and enjoy the travel...

      Hugs and Blessing my friend

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Fuller 2 years ago from Southern Illinois

      Rolly, I'm afraid of hights and interstates. I will not fly and I take the back roads. I have had these fears all my life. I can control my fear of flying by not doing it, but there are times when I must get on the interstate, when I do I have panic attacks, sweaty palms, rapid heartrate. I do not know why I'm so afraid. I've often thought that maybe I lived another time and was killed in a wreck. ( I'm not kidding. ) What do you think about reincarnation? I'm glad you were able to overcome your fears. Seeing your friend die in such a horrible way and not being able to help her was so sad. Take care.....

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      Rolly A Chabot 2 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Jodah ... and loo at you now, not only speaking but writing your thoughts through the power of the online world.... well done.

      Yes it was great loss in many ways as like most there was a far reaching circle of friends and family she left behind. Such a young life and taken so tragically. Thank you for your kind words.

      Blessings from Canada

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      Rolly A Chabot 2 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Bobbi... kind words and thank you. Yes you are so right and I have spoken of this many times over the years. The sight of seeing this all unfold are still so fresh and to think only 30 prior she had been alive and so full of zeal.

      It is a good reminder for us all to think as we progress through life and hold it dear as being so precious.

      Hugs from Canada

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 2 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Jackie... Thanks for the comment and come long now... skydiving we can hook you up to me and away we go.... well on second thought I better get re-certified for doing that. Glad you have small fears and have learned to live around them...

      Hugs and Blessings

    • Jodah profile image

      John Hansen 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      A wonderful fireside chat Rolly. I think we all have fears and as you did the best way to overcome them is to face them head on. You did that in spades. I have overcome a few fears, like speaking in public. I volunteer.

      Tweeted to be secretary at a local fire brigade so I had no choice but to speak in public, reading minutes of meetings etc. Often if I have to act fast without thinking of the consequences I will act quite fearlessly. It is if I Have time to think of consequences that I will be reluctant to do things. This was a good lesson. Sorry to hear about the tragic death of your friend. That would have been difficult to get over.

    • PurvisBobbi44 profile image

      PurvisBobbi44 2 years ago from Florida

      Hi,

      Overcoming ones fears is a huge challenge and you did it with gusto. I know you feel great about it.

      I am sorry about your friend and now that you’ve talked about it---your bruised heart should heal and your memories of her will only be sweet ones.

      Have a wonderful weekend and be good to yourself.

      Bobbi Purvis

    • Jackie Lynnley profile image

      Jackie Lynnley 2 years ago from The Beautiful South

      So very sorry about your friend and hope she was as ready as you are. I have a few fears too but I don't feel the need to overcome them; say like jumping out of a plane. I just simply won't do it and I will be fine; right? lol

      Good to hear from you and hope all your bad weather is gone!

      ^+