- Games, Toys, and Hobbies
The Waiting Game - How Video Games supposedly evolved.
Excited Phase 1
You just heard about this amazing new console (let's call it Jubilee) that's going to come out sometime in the next holiday season. At first you're not too sure. Will it really be worth buying? Will it have good games? However from reading more and more about it from magazines and TV show you suddenly start getting a bit excited.
Excited Phase 2
So, you finally decided to go check out some of the games for the starting line-up of the Jubilee's release. There are a few games you'd be interested in, but not too many.
Excited Phase 3
That's right, you read it correctly: Your favorite game series will have a new installment on this brand new console and from the looks of it, it'll be an amazing game. (let's call it: Burning Fire Tires 7)
Excited Phase 4
The console has been released but the game you are waiting for won't be for about 6 months. You figure it's best to start saving up now so that you can buy the console and game at the same time.
Excited Phase 5
6 months have passed. You just went to the store and dished out somewhere around 300 bucks to buy Jubilee and Burning Fire Tires 7. You are now giddy in your car and as soon as you get home you put the console on and the game in so that you can start playing right away...
Oh wait, you can't.
How do you put the game in? They really don't make it that obvious. Where did they hide the button? "Grr, let me get the stupid booklet."
Oh ok, game in.
First you have to give out a username. Ok. "Player1111. Let's play!!!"
Oh no, you still can't. You are asked to fill out a profile and possibly some settings for future online play. Oh, but wait, you only want to play the one-player part of the game right now. You're thinking "I can fill out all of that info later on, right now I want to play".
Ah, but of course you can't go on until you've filled out all of the required parts of the profile. Now it's time to play!!!
If only you could find the games section of this complicated media menu. You thought you bought this console to play games, but apparently the console makers decided they wanted you to also share media. Isn't that what your computer is for? Oh well, time to attempt locating the games menu.
Ok, it's found. Let's start the game!!
[publisher logo] You attempt to click all the buttons in order to skip directly to the start page, but it doesn't work
[developer logo] You're still clicking in the hopes of a direct skip
[other logos you're not sure why they are there] Still clicking...
[start menu finally loads] You pick New Game. Player name? Meh, you'll just use the default name. Oh wait, there isn't one. Ok, you'll just write the shortest name you can think of: "Ed".
Getting excited and ready to play aren't you?
[Title sequence] "Wow, look at how pretty this is, they've done a great job!"
[3 minutes later] "Still going. When does this end?"
[eventually..] "Ok, the mini movie's over, time to play!"
"I have to enter a character name? I'll just use the default."
Aww, there's a tutorial sequence. This wouldn't be so bad if they hadn't made it so obvious that it was meant to initialize settings...
"Ok, can I F***** play now?"
[some "in-game" dialog]
[another movie sequence. You start to lie down]
"I get it, they're pretty. Can I play now?"
You just realized your screen has been stationary for 10 seconds. It's finally time to play.
Estimated Time: Anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hours.
Comparison: Game Boy
- I grab my Final Fantasy Legend
- put it in the obvious hole that the cartridge goes into.
- I turn it on and
- see a quick Nintendo logo,
- see my Start Screen.
- Press start.
- Aw an opening? Hey, I can make it go quicker by pressing A!
- Pick a character.
- A name? Let's make it short. "Ed". I get to play!!!!!
Estimate time: approx 40 seconds.
Comparison: Playstation (Final Fantasy VII)
- Press the Eject button to put a game. That's simple enough.
- Turn it on.
- You see a quick PlayStation logo.
- You then see a quick developer logo.
- Start menu.
- New game. Wow, go right into it.
Estimated Time: less than 2 minutes
New consoles suck, and so do many game openings, introductions, and starter tutorials (or starting missions that are really sucky tutorials in hiding).
If I want to play a new game, one that I'm probably really hyped up to play, I don't want my excitement to turn into frustration and boredom. No wonder I have more Game boy color games than I do DS and PSP games combined; also no wonder I never get excited when my brother buys new games for his 360, even though I'm always happy when he gets a new one for his PS2. Let's get to playing please.