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4 Steps to Change

Updated on October 17, 2017
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Rosemary is certified LOA Coach, Helping women who feel stuck in life or career to answer those silent questions that transform their life.

1. Recognize, 2. Acknowledge, 3. Release and Forgive, 4. Retrain

These 4 steps is a process that you can use when you are faced with change, or feeling of self-doubt, not good enough, or feeling unworthy.

When you are facing a decision, or change in your life, your mind / ego starts with the self-talk, of why it's not possible. Or you may remember when you did something similar this happened.

Imagine you are driving a car on the road of life, and your mind has been the navigator. Giving you ideas, inspiration, showing you opportunities and everything is flowing smoothly.

Then you hit a road block, you freeze, or go into shock. You think "What should I do?" Or "I don't know what to do?"

Imagine your mind suddenly panics, and thinks "oh they have let go of the steering wheel". The mind grabs the steering wheel, and it doesn't know how to drive. It has the steering wheel on hard lock to the right, and you are just going in circles.

This visualization I have just shared with you, is how many people's lives are. 4 Steps to Change help you get back into the driving seat. By taking control of the steering wheel again, and allowing the mind doing what it knows best, navigating.

Step 1 - Recognize

  • Identify what the situation is, and how it takes you away from that joyful being that is your true nature.

  • Describe the entire situation or circumstance that you are feeling, or experiencing.
    Ask yourself, “Where is this coming from?”

  • Be real and honest with yourself, so you can clearly look at what is happening or happened. Once you know how it happened, you are in a better place to change it.

  • When you become aware and recognize that you are out of the state of feeling good, you have the power to change.

Nothing Happens

Until you decide

Make a Decision and

Watch your life move forward

— Oprah

Step 2 Acknowledge

  • Law of attraction works through your feelings, emotions, and what energy you put out, through your thinking, thoughts, and your stories you keep telling. All this creates your feelings and emotions.
  • If you not sure what you are thinking, stop, and look at your feelings. If you are feeling negative, despondent, then your thoughts will be negative as well. If you are feeling happy, joyful, in well-being, your thoughts are positive.
  • By acknowledging how this happened and who created it. It's an important part of the process, and you are able to implement change.
  • By asking the question
  • “Who created this?” The answer is You. You may not believe at first that you created it.
  • "Stop and see what stories you are telling yourself, how are are you feeling. What negative thoughts are you having, thinking or saying?"

Ask yourself the following questions and follow along with the exercise.

  • “Why did I create this”?
  • “What would I have to believe to create this situation in my life?”

•List a minimum of 10 reasons why you would have created this. By taking pen to paper, and writing no censoring, just allowing the hand and pen to flow across t

Once the list is complete
Go back and review each one on the list,
Ask the following questions
Is this true?
Does this resonate as truth to me?
You may have a few reasons why you would have created it. But now you are aware and you can have the power to change it

Creating Your List


Step 3 Forgive and Release

You have acknowledged where the negative emotions have come from, and realized how you created everything in your reality.

Now release all these pent up emotions and feelings. One very effective method is deep breathing.

Deep breathing.

  • Take deep breath through your nose, and exhaling out through your mouth.
  • Do this several times, and you will feel yourself growing calmer and peaceful.
  • You may find yourself yawning a lot, this is good, you are releasing energy that is stuck within you.
  • You may also feel other emotions surface, like sadness, or tears, let them surface, and keep breathing.
  • Just feel the sadness, let the tears flow, keep breathing, you will notice after a little while you feel calmer and more peaceful.

Time to forgive yourself.

  • “Why would I want to forgive myself?”
  • "You have been beating yourself up with all your negative self-talk, and the stories you have been telling yourself".
  • “Stop, and think about what you have been saying to yourself?”
    “What stories have you been telling yourself?”
  • “What negative words have you been saying to yourself?”
    “What has been your self-talk?”

I use Ho’ponopono which is a very powerful mantra that originated in Hawaii.

"I am sorry
Please forgive me
I love you
Thank you"

Setting Yourself Free

Step 4 Retrain

Now, you are feeling calmer and more peaceful. It's time to start to create what you want in life. A great way to start doing this is asking yourself some questions.

  • How do you want to feel?
  • What do you want to create?”
  • “What experience do you want to have?”
  • “What would it feel like if you had your desire or goal”

Grab a pen and paper. Answer the above questions, by describing what it is you want to experience and feel. Allow your hand and pen to flow over the paper, with no editing, just allow your thoughts to flow.

Once you have finished, read it through, and start visualizing what it would feel like to have what you want, and how would it feel having it.

  • Tip:
    Having Positive affirmations help create new positive beliefs.
  • I am firm believer that when you are doing affirmations, they should resonate with you.
  • They should create a joy, an excitement, and they feel good to you.
  • Using words in the now like 'I am' 'I now have' I am willing..' ' I am now"

With Law of Attraction, to create what you want in life, is being in the feeling of joy and happiness. By putting this energy out into the Universe you attract back more of the same. Joy and Happiness.

The same goes when you are thinking negatively, you attract back what you put out.

Example of some affirmations, to start you on your way to creating positive new beliefs.

  • “Everything is always working out for me”
    “Things are working out for me”

    “I am peace”
    “Today is great day.

    Plus, any other positive affirmations that resonate with you, and make you feel good and feeling of joy.

© 2017 Rosemary Leach


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